Rindu..

Kejadahnye tiba2 nk rindu ni kan..
Tp di time2 hujan ni mmg tiba2 cam rasa giler plak.. huhuu..
Td tgk TV ada Eizlan Yusuff.. So what??
Apsal la si Eizlan tu suka meremindkan aku kat seseorang..
Serabot tau.. serabot..

Dah berjuta tahun benda tu jadi.. takkan tak get over lg...
Takkan nk jadi cam citer nenek kebaya lak...
nk dendam 7 keturunan..
Aku takdela nk dendam2..
Life must go on.. Ingatkan mmg da fully recover..
In fact jumpa pun takde rasa apa dah.. kot..
lama gakla tak jumpa dah.. since dat particular day..

Apapun aku doakan ko bahagia..
I never hold any grudge..
You're forgiven n I always wanted u to be happy..
Somehow for me..
Life must go on.. though it's so fuckin hard!!

Ermm

Td, time tgh2 nangis rasa cam nk meluahkan rasa sedih thru blog.. tp skrg rasa mcm malas nk tulis.. btw, airmata da habis kuar td.. ntah2 posa arini da batal dah..
I've no shoulder to cry on..

Any1?? Owh how I miss old time..
:D

Jobless and Penniless

It's been a while ehh..

This evening my youngest bro ask my youngest sista to teach him Bahasa Melayu. I was really good in BM back then. I even get A1 for BM paper ok.. hehe..
Eika was saying to Jamil, "Suh Kak Uci ajar. Dia pun dlu blajar BM gak."
Innocently replying, "Kak Uci tu tak pandai."
So, I was kinda un satisfied. I asked him to read the question so I can come out with the answer. Well, it was a loooooooooong time ago. I don't remember at all.
First question was, acronym.
Layu = Segar.. I was saying MEKAR
Bongkak = I said Bengkok, (honestly I've no idea about this acronym)
Cekap = ??
Musnah = ???

Turn out, none of the question was answered by this sista. Damn, my english is like sooo tonggang terbalik.. My BM is sooooooooo out!!

my bad..my bad..

I'm jobless!! To be true..
I was so fucking depress for the past few weeks, luckily this time around I didn't getaway to another country and caused all the hassle.. ahakss..
So, this evening.. told boss I wanna concentrate on my project and writing. Don't wanna be his kuli anymore. He said ok. But yet, I wanna hv black and white prove. Work out on it later. Not working = no money = more free time.. but more free time if no money what can do??

So, gotta got to work on something later..
Till then..
Chioww

When I lie.. I wish for the wellbeing of the other party..

It's been a while yah..
Been busy lately.. So many things happened and yet, I'm not having enof time announcing thing here.. (haha.. like very important la kan??)
Nothing exciting pun, just that attended Pharmacy Conference last week @Penang. having good time with Onah n Farihah (though, I dunno if they are enjoying themselves hanging out with me..) hehehee.

This morning, accompany Nazim who finally registered as UiTM's Postgrad stud.. Welcome to the club dude. Lama gilak tak jumpa dia.. so it so good to see old friend.
Called Awyck yesterday. He almost giving me heart attack by not recognizing me. Well, of course I'm not that famous but come on la. I've been using the same number for ages. He still the exciting awyck I used to know. Really miss him to the bits. Btw, thinking of going to JB and perhaps further down to Singapore but this H1N1 thingy scares out of me. Damn!! Chill awyck, I'll try to find a good time to hang out with u.

My master project was selected to be exhibited in 'Pencipta Exhibition'. Not sure what it is all about but then it is National level. Last time @ University level, can only get Silver. Let see what can I get this time around. Another ticket to Korea perhaps.. :p (in my dream of course)

What else, my in vitro studies giving me so much headache.. therefore, i really need a break..
hahaha

Till then..

I'm missing someone here.. God, please help me.. hehee

Con te Partiro...

A friend is having difficulty in love.. which then makes me a not very right person giving her a piece of advice..
But yet, I did..
Well, you know.. as Rossa said 'Tak semua laki2 busuk.." but most of it yea..
Busuk as in not in its real meaning la.. then u hv to find out what the hell 'busuk' meant in her song.
Seeing her crying over one stupid.. damn stupid guy, gv some ache in my heart. Somehow, I saw myself in her. When I was so fuckin stupid back then. Yet, I've all the friends in the world by my side, yet she's alone.
What we did? A little drama here n there which then every single drama strangle myself to death. Hurt me even worst but guess what, no regret. All of it.. a very precious experience in life to be remembered.

The same whole things repeated here.. hohoho..


Went to Medan Ikan Bakar Jeram, last nite. It was on my request.. but the food wasn't as our expectation. Papa said it was wayyyyy to far to reach his satisfaction. Memang tak sedap. Wonder how Kak Yana can say, the place is good. Well, no more after this.. not good for me, not good for my family. The price can be considered cheap la..but the taste.. I'm sorry, very bad!

Eika is taking her driving license class starting today. She get excited over having license soon. So pasni she can drive like crazy la.. Looking at her, in her 40kg body, trust me she even had drive lorry. So, shame on those big guys whom still don't know how to drive. Get yourself a license soon!! Will ya!

My updates? Having an on and off affairs with ppl. Yea bitching around like usual. Yet, only those who can stand me and my way will stay.. the rest just jump away. Likely, I'm into chinese nowadays.. tell me why?? I guess because of my childhood dreams kot.. I always wanted to have chinese boyfriend.. ahakss.. sampai kata, if say I can't marry one, jadi bf pun is more than enoff.. ahakss.. N, this chinese guy is from Sarawak.. that's not the funny part! Hell yeah.. I started speaking S'wak somehow, though byk giler words I haven't heard. Blom gik ngan chinese term nyak. Haiyahhh... (btw, Mal sorry.. I was really forgot that u r S'wakian.. huhuuu)
Most likely, I can see Papa is holding parang if he ever heard about this chinese guy thingy.. hoohoohooo...

Takpela, tak dapat real chinese, chinese look pun ok pa.. Any1?? hahaaa

# Poster conference tak wat lagi.. Malas gilak aritok..
Internet slow gilak sampei rasa nk nyumpah jak... Sabar jaklah.. huhuuu


NANA.... HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAR!!!!

Kembali ke alam kenangan...

Tatau nk tulis aper..
Idea.. Lost..
Just now, aku bukak blog lama aku.. zaman2 aku baru putus ngan 1st love.. cheitt..
Zaman2 aku baru berhubungan ngan 'bestfriend' aku..
Zaman2 aku rasa aku jatuh cinta buat kali kedua..
Zaman2 aku rasa somebody betul2 da buat aku get over 1st love..
Zaman2 yg aku rasa sangat happy sekali..
Aku rindu sangat zaman tu..

Tapi bila2 da tua ni, kenangan tu jadi sesuatu yg sangat berharga..
Aii love it..
All the terms..
Teng-teng..
Orang tuh..
Mr X..

Whatever..
When there were times, Mr Orenz asik bagi komen..
Mr A.. Mr N.. Mr S.. Mr I..
Akak.. Ady.. Yazi.. Awin..
Thoseever... whoever..

Weh... the blog is still exist...
Conversation ngan Mr S..
Argument ngan Mr Orenz..
Hahaa..

Aku cam tak caya je.. it's all there..
So there it is.. Aku sangat malas arini..
kenangan2 ni buat aku rasa sangat malas.. hehee

Mentally, Emotionally and Physically Exhausted...

It wasn't pass a week after coming back from notsolong holiday, yet I had myself a stress all over again. Geezzz..

Well, this is expected from the very beginning but never in mind had I ever imagine it will be this worst. The first day in work, I was given a new task and it was like repeating the whole fucking series of work which has been damnly repeated before. Hell, life was like in hell!!

Tuesday, I ran for the animal handling training, which me, myself had killed 3 cute little mice for the bleeding purposes. Yea, after cardiac puncture, the mice still alive and I had to purposely kill them by break their neck. I was sinfully cruel.. Damn me!!

2nd day of training, I had to kill another 3 mice and 2 rats. Test was performed in the evening and I failed my first paper.. hahaa.. for a RM1600 course, it was a shame to fail..

Yet, I failed 3 papers. Huhuu... :p Like I say.. who cares??

OK, done with the training..

Saturday n Sunday, another training and got to finish some unfinish stuffs. So stay in the lab till 9pm on sat and 8pm on Sunday. What a pity life!!

Today, I kinda MALASSSSSS giler to do anything.. So I'll be walking around to do stuffs.. for relaxing.. huhuu..

Guys, check the Perhentian Pics @ my FACEBOOK

Till then.. I need a break again.. after 1 week stressful working day.. Ahakss

Pissed off...

I cried myself out yesterday. All d way from campus to the house.
I cried like a baby. I cried with sounds which never happened before.
Whenever I cry, sob is the only sound will be heard.
Yesterday, was the worst cry ever..

I didn't cry that way when my first love breaks my heart.
I didn't cry that way when the person I love wants us to be apart.
I didn't cry that way when being scolded for going to Bangkok on my own.

But I cried like hell bcoz of that SOB.
I can never keep everything on my own. Was really disappointed and need some 1 to talk to.
I don't really need a boyfriend for that. All I need is an understanding parents.
I know, each time my dad sees me cry, he cries himself inside too..
But I need him to know my situation.. my hardness.. my life..
Family is important to him..
But not when his own family treating his daughter real bad.
How dare that 'Sob' treated me the way that Papa couldn't even imagine.
If he can turn back time.. for sure Papa will never pay a penny for dat 'Sob' studies expenses.

Now, let me finish my things.. n then you and you family can go to HELLLL!!!
I may don't have uncle to pay my expenses but I hv a FATHER who are willing to do that for me.
If my dad can pay an expenses throughout 4 years study time, he much more willing to pay for my expenses double of the time.

I really need a break. I'm going to Kuantan tonight. Need a refresh. Perhaps tomorrow we'll go to Perhentian again.

Mencari kenangan yg masih tersisa....

Si Penjaga Parking..

Actually, aii kinda mad at him. Obviously, tenggelam timbul as he wish..
Sapa tak bengang kan?

Ermm, it has been what eh yang? more than 2 weeks kot he's not around. I mean we were not in touch. As I fully understood his business as "Penjaga Parking", I don't really give so much damn for the first one week. But then, on the second week, I started to feel uncomfortable. U know, who knows something might have happened and yet I don't know. So, I try to call him.. UNREACHABLE..
Again, I try to sms.. my 1st sms was delivered with no reply. The second one failed. So, again I had this good thinking perhaps his phone MIA or whatever good reason I can think of. Oh ya, it's a millenium era, so I left him a message in whatever media I might be able to.. YM, Email, FB, FS.. whatever..
No reply..
After two weeks, I had this feeling. Owh.. he's no longer available.. Die?? I can't think the worst..
Sorry yayang.. u started first.. :p

This afternoon, when I was having headache with LC (chromatography always gv ppl headache.. trust me!), heard an sms beep from my old, cheap nokia phone.
"Hello, hehe yayangku. Baru balik dari Afganistan. How are u yang?"
Who on earth will still smile receiving such msg? You tell me??
So aii reply with not really friendly msg.. huhuu..
"Owh hidup gik. All this while u kat afgan? What r u doing there? Kejar Osama laden?I'm sulking! Not talking! Btw, u ok ke?"
See.. girls no matter how mad they are still concern tau tak!!
Well the rest of the conversation is history.. :p
Btw, did I tell you my headache not getting any better?? huhuu (although i know he's fine & alive)

But still yayangku si penjaga parking.. I'm mad as hell..
Not talking.. Still sulking..
Glad, u r fine n able to find ur way back here.. :p

So.. the mystery is no longer mystery
My yayangku still alive and kicking.. :D

Oh ya, how about friends who are sick?
Have you been well? Going to Subang again tomorow..
Hope you are doing well friend. Miss your smile n laugh..
Lets enjoy the life to the fullest!!

Happy Birthday Babe..

It's your 29th..
I still remember the date..
I will always..

Happy 28th Birthday Babe..
It's been your third year, not celebrating your own birthday..
But no worries.. I will always remember..

May you are fine down there..

MISS YOU..

It's Sunday.. & U'll be fine..

I was supposed to go to the lab early morning. I have a hell lot of things to do..
Yet, after finished my laundry n cleaning spree I took a break on bed and overslept till noon.
Yea.. as usual, when life started @noon u'll be lazy..

Headed to SJMC to visit a friend of mine. He's been there for quite sometimes. Ermm few days.
Lung cancer..
At the age of 29..
2nd stage.. I don't know what is it and I don't wanna know..

**To all my friend who are smoking.. Please stop..

Spending a little time with him as visiting hour ends early.
While was with him, another friend texted me, saying he's not very well..
Wanted to visit him but he gave me a big NO-NO answer..
I don't know, maybe he got his girlfriend over.. :p
Kidding..

So, without anything to do.. I headed back to Shah Alam and get myself into work!
Giler.. on sunday still hv this eagerness to work..
Yeay me.. yeay..

Dude,
Of course.. it's scared me to death to think about death..
But you'll be fine.. Even the doctors say so..
I'll try to come each time I've free time..

p/s: see you manage to get urself being writtenin my blog.. hahhaa
Another life.. another sadness.. another hope..
Wish you well soon...

He's just not into you..

I just closed Yazi's blog tab!
Trust me, I wrote the title first b4 I even thinkin to check on her blog.
Deymnn!!! I'm a lil bit late hon..
hehehe.. whateverla, kinda we hv the same thing in mind..
If only.. If only..
Ahakss... (btw, I wonder who the hell is your new 'Abu Hurairah'?) hahaa

Well.. I'm still in the denial state. yeay.. pity me..
A hell a lot of courage needed..
Yet, I'm still there.. holding the memories..
Shit!!

He's just not into you..
Can't u understand that??
This evening after a hell of work done..
After few days not be able to get ol due to business...
After few days not be able to check my email..
I received something..
I got something..
And bushhhhh...
I hurt myself without even realizing it..
Damn it.. why is it hard for me to understand???
He's just not into you!!!

Hans Isaac, can't you be more available for me???
hahahaa...

A lot of thing to share yet I'm really not in the mood..
Maybe later.. when I can feel the excitement!!
Btw, I'm working on the rat still..
So I'm so fucking stink..


Hola... Me ames..
Let me hold on it..
Need no worries..
As it only takes me one hour to love you..
Yet it takes me forever to get over you..
May you in the best condition of yours...

Bila 4LLI I tunjukkan balasan time di dunia lagi...

biasa.. byk cerita dari seberang..
Grandma seems to regaining her health..
So Alhamdulillah..

Those persons who once hurts her all the way of her aging time..
Got their punishment already.. berkat kesabaran all of us..
Not that we are happy but we realized that once Allah said, KUN FAYAKUN..
Nothing you can do to change anything..
The son in law is having second wife, the daugther is having affair..
Not only 1.. but 2 SIL and 2 daugthers..

So, remember.. kalo buat salah probably Allah will give you CASH punishment!
SO minta maafla sblm terlambat!

Review: Seven Pounds

Ermm.. a bit delayed review on latest movie of Will Smith.
I was so busy for the past few weeks to write a review on this movie.
Even today, I'm still kinda very busy.
So no review today.
I'm tired and I wanna sleep.
Good Nite!

Hello...

Semalam balik dari Lab, aku singgah rumah jap. Amik ext. harddisk.
Dah dekat 2 minggu aku ulang alik shah alam-meru. Since Mama start sakit, sampai la ni Mama da sampai Jakarta. Aku kene ulang alik camni until Mama blk sini balik. Penat kalo nk ikutkan.. tp takleh nk wat pe..

Owh ye.. sambung blk citer td..
So on the way nk turun bawah tu, dgn bawa kain2 baju dlm paperbag, laptop backpack, ngan handbag lagi.. pastu tak lama tunggu lift, second lift nye pintu terbukak.. so aku pun masuk.. ada 2 guys which both hv this malay look. Ok whatever..

Then, one of the guy cakap, "Ada beghapa ghamai tok orang brunay diam siney?"
Aku buat bodoh.. I think dia cakap ngan kawan dia. Then bila aku still diam, dia cakap lagi,
"Excuse me, u dari mana?"
Aku tenung muka dia, aku tanya balik, "Me?"
Dia angguk.. Then aku cakap, "Indonezia" (with slang yer.. ahakss)
Pastu, dia cuit aku, aku toleh.. of course ngan muka masam n mata tak friendly langsung. Pe hal cuit2 orang?? Nak kene penampar.. Ceh tp aku tak cakap la.. aku ckp dlm hati je.. haha..

Dia tanya lagi, "Eh, you dari tgkt 9? Bukan level guys ke? U tinggal ngan lelaki ke?"
Aku bg dia pandangan mata yg agak kurang menyenangkan.. dia senyum sumbing.
Aku cakap, "8&9 , for girls, upward for guys"

Pastu dia ingat aku cam sombong kot, dia p cakap borneo ngan kawan dia lagi sorang..
Boleh dia cakap, "Lawa gilak pompuan ni tok."
Kawan dia pun balas blk, "mesti dia ingat ko ckp dia cantik.. hahaa"

Aku toleh dia, then aku cakap, "Kitak oghang saghawak kah? Next time madah saghawak ja. I do understand."

Time tu gak pintu lift terbukak.. AKu keluar..
The guy tu panggil aku blk.. Aku toleh.. 'Yes?'
"I never thought u r Indonesian, but u do hv a beautiful face. I would prefer you as Bruneian. Hehe.. Boleh bagi phone number?"

Aku cam.. ihh budak2 ni.. aku sembelih kang.. Aku senyum then masukkan barang dlm kete. Time aku nk kuar dari parking, derang lambai.. Aku senyum sendiri..

Weii.. tetiba aku rasa cam nk jadi muda balik.. hahahaa...
Kalo dlu nak je aku bg phone number.. bleh berscandal2 gitu.. huhuu..


Oh ya..
Arini agak malas nk tulis entry bergambar..
So,

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ROSE
& MY LOVELY SISTER, EIKA

Karena wanita ingin dimengerti...

Aku tatau nk start dari mana..
Actually, mcm aku malas gak nk tulis sbb takut tersilap tulis kang kene gelak je..
Arini da 2 kali aku ckp benda mengarut..
Satu aku cakap, Can u plz get me a glass in water?
Which I'm supposed to say, Can u plz get me water in a glass?
Pastu aku dok ckp2 ngan member.. rasanya aku siap antar sms bagai..
Cakap pasal pain in ass.. guess what?? Aku tulis ass in pain..
Tp yg best tu org diam.. aku pun tak pk blk..
tu maknanya aku tak pk apa yg aku ckp.. men lepas je..
Btw, forgive me.. ketensenan da bermula sbb esok boss blk..

ok done with that part.

Td aku dgr lagu Irwan Syah - Camelia. Haha..
Nama dia da dekat2 ngan nama aku tu.. Buang C, jadila Amelia.. :p
So excited aku tau lagu baru, aku pun send la kat sorang scandal aku ni..
Actually, takdela scandal pun.. kira cam kawan2 gitu le..
Aku tak pernah ada serius relationship ngan dia.. unless aku need him to send me somewhere somehow.. camtula.. kira mcm agak make used of him gakla.. hohohoo
Pastu.. owh. .. bukan aku send kat dia sorang.. ada few gak yg time tu tgh chatting ngan aku..
So aku just send link Youtube kat derang..

Guess what, this mamat.. dia ckp kat aku... "I bagi lgu ni kat u, ikhlas dari hati.. Lagu ni menggambarkan hati I yg sebenar.."
I was like.. WTF???
Aku cam.. erkk.. eh hello.. sejak bla la aii jd simpanan you??
Owh puh lease ok!!
Kuasa aku..
Yg mana sblm dgr lagu tu.. elok2 chatting, citer pasal nk tgk wayang..
So, go to hell.. I will never go out or see you.. You can go to Neraka!!

Ish.. terus hilang mood arini..

Btw, again... tlg la ok.. aku tak selera la..
Really not my cup of tea.. not at all!!
Kalo aku lelaki, I would say.. aku akan kene erectile dysfunction..
For God's sake!!

So what??
Owh, aku citer ngan kawan.. Dia kata, asal ko nk marah..
Lantak diala situ.. as long as ko rasa ko bukan simpanan dia okla..
Owh.. hmm.... ok

#Aku rindu.. rindu sangat... If only he knows..

Cayank ku Si Penjaga Parking...

Hehee...
Apekah??

Okla..
Who d hell is Si Penjaga Parking ni??

Guys..
Take it easy.. Sit still and relax..
No.. No.. No..
I'm not going to make any announcement here..
Owh Puh leaseeee..

Ok,
Aii kenal dia waktu2 zaman di UIA dulu..
Our Unimates gitu lho ceritanya..
Actually, whatever fact about him akan sangat memudahkan korang..korang.. sume kenal dia..
SO lets keep the fact..

So gini ni ceritanya.. ehh tolong ok.. Aii takde scandal ngan Cayank ku si Penjaga Parking ini..
Dia hanyala semata-mata the 'bestest' friend je..
Itu pun best for certain things je..
COntohnya mcm bab2 mengumpat.. ihikss..
Opss.. sorry cayank ku..
N juga.. cayank ku ini bukan banci.. eh.. bukan pondan.. bukan sekali2..
Katanya sih.. dia jejaka tulen.. tulen ke tulin aii tatau..
Tp kalo tgk kawan2 dia.. aii rasa dia jejaka tulen 100%..
or mungkin juga dia dua alam.. ihikss..
Ampun cayank ku.. dinda cuma bercanda ria.. huahuahua...

Ohya, cayank ku itu bukan apa2 ok..
its like panggilan je.. like his pet name or something..
It's not like whatever u've in mind..
Huhuu..

SO diharap dpt meleraikan kekusutan..
Aii not into whatever u r thinkin ayem..
Aii still having committment with tikus2 ku terchenta... hahahaa

Till then.. aii wanna hv a rest..
Btw, kekusutan masaian mereka2 yg nk tau pasal cayank ku si Penjaga Parking, tlh membuatkan cayank ku tak senang duduk.. mcm ayam berak kapur dah.. :p
Leks arr..
Enjoy life to the fullest!!!

Great week ever...

What so great about??
Boss takdak..
Outstation for 2 weeks..
So aii bebas..
Yeay!!
Masuk keje kul 12, blk kul 5..
Yeay!!
Sampai lab, main2 jap.. pastu balik..
Yeay!!
Nk wat keje pun takleh sbb machine rosak..
Yeay!!
So keje asik men game.. update blog..
Bacalah blog ni sampai bosan.. hehe..

Arini wat tikus..
Bukan buat.. tp keje ngan tikus..
So aii ada offer baekkkk punya...
Spa2 rasa nk buat soup tikus ke.. nk goreng masak merah ke, gulai ke..
Meh sini aku bg free je tikus ni..
Ermm terbayang kalo tikus ni dimasak madu..
Nyum.. Nyum..
hahahaa

Happy Weekend everybody..

## Rindu tgk wajah tu smlm.. hahahaa.. Doesn't change a bit!!
Muka tak bleh blah.. huhuu

Kiss...

Disclaimer: This is an XXX rated entry. Please close browser if u are an underage...

I like this very much.. Feet kiss..

They said, this is French Kiss.. Why??

Romance..

A friend of mine ask for an opinion.
Which then leads to another big question mark.

The friend asks me, 'So what if he ask me to kiss him?'
I really don't know what to say.
'Why it has to involve kissing?'
Kinda blurr.. I asked Cayank ku Si Penjaga Parking..

He said, "In business world, you gotta do what you gotta do."
My mouth dropped like I can't believe I ever heard he saying that.
"Are you implying it yourself dear?"
He just laugh..
Is it for real? Do you really have to be like that? I mean selling everything for the sake of business??

I may be naive but I'm not really into the idea of kissing stranger.
Not even with you Mr Cayank ku Si Penjaga Parking.
Hohohoo...
Migrain! Migrain!


Mama is going to Jakarta next week. How I wish I can go but my condition is really out of topic.
Grandma is admitted now. Mama just released. I wonder if Mama is strong enof to take care Grandma..

Gotta go..
Hujan lebat adalah waktu paling tepat untuk Tidur....

Catatan buat Si Penjaga parking..

Been awhile since aku chat ngan cayank ku si Penjaga Parking..
Since balik dari Borneo, tatau aper kabar berita..
Ingat da terus kawin n settled down kat sana.. ihikss..
Rupa2nya da blk ke KL..
Khabarnya ke Borneo hanya mencari sesuap nasi..
Siannye cayank..
Kalo takat nk cari sesuap nasi watpe g Borneo sana..
Jauh..
Datang umah aii.. satu periuk nasi aii masakkan..
Siap aii bagi extra ikan dalan tin.. hehe..

Cayank ku kata,
ada hadiah tuk aku dari Borneo..
Biasa, kata baru blk outstation..
Adiahnye adalah a piece of rotten DAIM!
What a lovely present I've ever had..
Sebab, not long time ago..
A friend.. just a friend.. of course a guy fren..
But really just a friend... my cayank at all..
He went back from Germany for conference or something..
He gave me one big plastic of DAIM and other chocolates.. (which I'm not sure Halal ke tak.. but I'm sure aii bedal je)..
Now, u r claiming urself as my cayank yet u wanna give me A PIECE OF ROTTEN DAIM??
U r the most romantic guy alive la cayank..

OK.. done with it.
Saja takde keje..
Aii just wanna wish my cayank si Penjaga Parking will become a CEO soon..
& also will get his Dato'ship afterwards..
So that whoever marry him will get the Datin title..
And also will hv their wedding at the Palace of the Golden Horses..
Therefore, can beat his BESTFRIEND (dunia akhirat)!
AMIN...

Cayank.. see how much I adore you..
Despite what u've done aii still pray the best for you..
Nnt once u decided to hv ur wedding at PGH or the real Palace, do let me know ok..
Of course u kene invite aii..
I contribute gak aper.. tuk mendoakan yuuuu...

Ok cayank!!!

**Cici in the bengong mode.. sebab arini April Fool**

Last but not least,

HAPPY BIRTHDAY EG!!!

SELAMAT ULANGTAHUN SAYANG..

Yang tulus ikhlas
Ingin sekali sekala dirinya dibalas
Walau hanya dengan dakapan di angin lalu

Yang selalu memberi
Ingin sekali sekala jadi penerima
Cukup dengan salam dan manis doa

Aku ingin kau merasakan hebatnya cinta
Dan leburkan saja serpihan calar derita

Selamat ulang tahun sayang
Kini kau bersayap, pergilah terbang
Rentaslah langit cita cita mu
Harap nanti kita ‘kan bertemu'

Selamat ulang tahun sayang
Janganlah engkau tak terbang pulang
Ku nanti penuh kerinduan
Selamat tinggal, selamat jalan

Aku hanya inginkan engkau setia
Kerana setia yang mencipta bahagiamu


EG, as usual.. birthday gift ko da aku kirimkan kat Abang Santa. Agaknya dia ingat tu hadiah tuk Krismas kot.. pastu dia lupa.. hehee
As usual gak, aku slalu bg ko cake.. This time around, aku bg cake gak...

How bout this one?? Cam terover lak kan??

Or Macadamia chocolate cake from Secret recipe?? Whichever u like ok!!!

But please.. please.. please.. jangan makan sampai macam ni ok!!..

Love you big girl!!

A humble request...

Dear friends,
Do spare a little of your precious time for a very humble request from me. Please pray for my Mom's and Grandma's wellness.
Mom just recovered from her illnesses, though not fully recover but getting better and hopefully everything will be back to normal soon. How I wish..
Please..

Thank you very much for your do'a. My family & I really appreciate it.

*********************************************************

It has been 3 weeks since I spent a night in my very own room. Yet to be back here again seems like everything that I would trade with. I just miss my time having a rest in my very own room. Not that, I didn't have my own room in Kristal but somehow, I don't feel Kristal as a home. Just something wrong somewhere as I can recall.

Mom cleaned up the spare room at the back and my youngest sister moved to that room. Well, all this while she wants to hve her own room and now she got it. Nurul is happy to have the room as her wish. So now everyone has their own room. Nobody shares except of course, Mom n Dad.

I never had a chance to share my bedroom with any of my sisters. In fact, they know how much I loath sharing my room. Hehe.. Unless it is emergency.

*****************************************************************

Had a very long night on the day before so I woke up a little late on Sunday morning. Nurul already prepared the breakfast. Since Mom not really well, Nurul take over the kitchen. She prepared breakfast n lunch before went to college. She really some1 now.

I couldn't believe myself in this situation. May Allah gives me some strength to face things sanely.

Aku?? malas??

Malas nk update..
Tp pg ni rasa cam excited nk start hari baru..
Slps ber'stress' sakan semalam..
Formulation dah setel..
In vivo..
In vitro..
So many things to do..
Yet not enof time..

Semalam stress bukan pe..
The whole day, aku committed wat keje..
Tak macam biasa..
Tp tula..
Sakit hati tak siapa tau..
Buang masa je aku smlm..
Satu mende pun tak jadi..

Hari ni, tak disangka..
Formulation smlm yg tak jadi tuh..
Dah jadi..
Huhuuu..
A bit lega..
Tp bila repeat balik..
Tak jadi plak..
Trus aku naik gler.. Deymnnn!!!

Ohya, pagi td.. a beep from hp ku.. Msg masuk kul 6.05am. Deymmnnn!!! aku masih tdo ok!
"Suci, boleh tak tukar tiket flight? - Mas"
Aku cam?? Kejadahnya?? Ingat aku keje jual tiket flight ke??
So aku reply, "Ha? boleh kot. Ikut ko beli tiket aper la. Kalo yg promo nye.. tak dapat kot.Btw, ni tiket aper?"
"Tiket mas la." Mati!! Gubrakk!! Nama dia Mas, mana aku nak tau dia letak kat hujung 1st msg tu company tiket yg dia beli tu.
For God's sake!!!
It was early morning. baru kol 6. Biasanya aku masih diulit mimpi lg ok!!
Aku ckp camtu kat dia..
Dia kata "kat sini da siangla.."
Aku lupa dia di Borneo. Semenjak jadi Cikgu di pedalaman di S'wak, dia mmg suka bgn awal.
Sbb dia kene bgn awal..
Hehehe.. Sorry Mas.. Aku gurau je.. :p

Pastu, time aku ngah mandi, another beep..
(Awat life aku cam bosan je?? Asik beep je.. takkan takde bunyi yg menarik sket.. hahaha)
"Can I have both? Hahaha.."
Aku cakap.. " Don't be greedy"
Sebenarnya aku nk cakap, -"Asal nk dua je? kalo nak 4 ke 8 ke soploh pon bleh.." hahahaa

So aku makin sengal..
Hopefully things getting better..

Btw, apa kabar mu disana??

Arini rasa cam nak bunuh org...

Rasa je ok..
Rase je..
Tp blom ada duit nk upah org..
Sabar jek la..

So sesapa yg berani2 nk cari pasal ngan aku..
Tunggu jela..
Hahahaa..

Deymnn!!
I hate it..

*********

Smlm dia beep aku..
Aku merajuk..
Dia ckp br lepas meeting..
Dah kul 11pm..
Meeting kejadahnya..
Dia kata meeting ngan PakLah..
Tipu pun berpada2la..
Taula da jd org besar..
Huhuu..
Btw, I miss you Yang..
Hahaha

Metaphor?? What the??

Ok, the tittle got nothing to do with what I'm gonna write later.

It was early morning, for God's sake.
Beep from phone wakes me up.
A message.
I was so under my sleepy mode to realize who sent the message.
It says, "Yang, I dah nak naik flight. Miss you muahss"
At that state of my mind, I'm simly reply
"Ok.Syg take care. Jgn nakal2. Miss you too muahss"

Then I crawl back into my comforter and jumped out when I heard the alarm from the phone.
Shit, it was almost 8.30am when I finished my shower.
Get ready and go out.
Realized I left my phone, I got back into the room and got the phone.
Well, it was still at the message.
The fact I didn't close the app.

Ehh.. some1 sent me a message this morning.
But I really can't remember. Gosh..
Check back. What I've wrote.
Who call me Yang?
Perhaps some1 sent to the wrong number and I directly reply.
Luckily it was from some1 i know.
Hahaa..

Can't keep smiling on my stupidoshh..
What if the message from some1 else.
Owh... I really tired lately. I can't even think straight.

#p/s: yang, dun forget some cake batik for me.. mishh you muahss... hahahahhahahaa

** example of nice metaphor
"Before I met my husband, I'd never fallen in love. I'd stepped in it a few times."
(Rita Rudner) - so cici said, meaning that I've never fallen in love yet. Fuhh..

Sakit Sendiri

At the moment, Aii layan sentimental songs.. the very mellow one.. huhuu..

Cindy Bernadette - Sakit Sendiri

Ada yang kurasa dari dirimu
Kau kini menjauh apa salahku
Apakah ku menyakiti hatimu
Katakan padaku jangan membisu

Kau kini berbeda jauh
Dari Wanita yang dulu
Membuatku jatuh cinta
Siapa yang telah merubahmu
Untuk meninggalkanku ..kasih

Bila engkau harus pergi
Tinggalkan saja ku sendiri
Jangan bilang masih cinta
Kau hanya membuatku menangis
Untuk apa bilang sayang
Buat hatiku makin susah
Pergilah kasih pergi saja
Biar aku sakit sendiri

Walaupun harus berpisah
Takkan kulupakan engkau
Yang pernah ada di dalam hidupku
Tak mungkin aku memaksa
Kalau memang cinta tlah sirna

Mungkin ini yang terbaik

Cindy Bernadette - Cinta Mati

dengarlah cinta ada yang ingin kukatakan
seorang dirimu adalah cermin hatiku
hidup hanya kuberikan untuk bersama dirimu
selalu ...

tetapi entah kapan dan apa yang terjadi
kau bilang mungkin kini saatnya untuk sendiri
apakah cintaku selalu
takkan pernah cukup untuk membuatmu bahagia

katakan pabila cintaku salah
kurangkah perhatian untuk dirimu
untuk membuat dirimu bahagia
seumur hidupku aku takkan mengalah

oho...

adakah waktu untuk membuatku mengerti
apa yang seharusnya kulakukan untukmu
buat diri ini belajar untuk mengerti hati seorang lelaki

katakan pabila cintaku salah
kurangkah perhatian untuk dirimu
untuk membuat dirimu bahagia
seumur hidupku aku takkan menyerah

apa lagi yang harus kukorbankan
untuk membuktikan rasa sayangku
sepanjang hidupku aku tak mungkin menyerah
padamu aku cinta mati

oho...

katakan pabila cintaku salah
kurangkah perhatian untuk dirimu
untuk membuat dirimu bahagia
seumur hidupku aku takkan menyerah

apa lagi yang harus kukorbankan
untuk membuktikan rasa sayangku
sepanjang hidupku aku tak mungkin menyerah
padamu aku cinta mati

Cindy - This is my way

With everything I've been thru
Why would you say I'm not good enough for you
Even when things are fallin
I would stand here beside you
I wont stop for nothing
That's how i pledged to your heart

This is my way
The way i love you
But i wont force you to stay
If you never want to
And I'll be alright without you
Cause when a man can't appreciate
So what's for a woman to stay?

It aint easy
To give you everything you want
Love you no matter what
Even on the days I don't
If i stay you'd run me over
So it's my call
I call it over..

Guess I'm better off without you
It's all I gotta do and I wont stop for nothing
That's how i pledged to your heart

I wont stop givin up on love
I must be another man treasure
Just because of you
Dont think I'm too desparate
You can go front to
Your boy's say it was you who call it off
I don't give a damn about a thing you say
Coz I know my way, and I refuse to be the fool to stay


Cindy - With or Without you

Many roads I have walked
Breakin thru all the rocks
Kickin all the pebbles
Here I am where I belonged
Not regreting what I've done
Better person I become
It's all up to you what to say
I don't give a damn what you think about me
I make my path I make my future

If you think your judgement can bring me down
You better think twice coz
Aint nothing pulls me apart
I'm so much stronger than I was before
And I can make it thru with or without you
With or without you

Many years I have passed
Many sweeter things like lies
The more of bitterness I've tasted
But I don't care what's in the past
Let it burried in the grave
Cause I am walking out untainted
It's all up to you what to say
I don't give a damn what you think about me
I choose my path I choose my future

Though my future in your eyes seems so far away
You better think twice coz
It's never beyond my reach no..
I'm halfway there I'll make it to the end
Yes I will make it thru with or without you
With or without you


That's all for now.. Later aii tambah lagi.

# Td download lagu2 arab. Sekalinya ada one singer tu nama dia (dalam huruf arabla kan) Ra-Ya-Nun.. SO aii pun cam oo nama ni cam nama india Rayan?? kan?? Sekalinya bila donlot lagu tu.. nama mamat handsome nk mampus tu is Ryan.. Keren gitu kan?? Ahakss..

Kla.. time to go home..
What a tired Sunday!!

One day in the stressful week..

Hari ini and hari2 yg aku rasa nk menulis dalam bahasa aku akan guna bahasa. Sebab rasa cam sucks je nk tulis dalam omputih setelah lama aku tak gunakan bahsa omputih tu. Owh semalam aku guna bahsa omputih sbb aku terjumpa ngan Bassl, the proud Arabs tu. Huh...

Semalam hari kurang baek untuk aku. Pagi2 aku sengal g buat keje bodoh end up aku tak buat keje sampai petang. Aku nk call sapa pun aku tatau. Mesti masing2 sibuk. Aku malas nk online. So all I can think of ialah Yazi. Sebab dia sorang je yg waktu keje dia pelik sket n aku rasa cam dia selalu free nk cakap ngan aku. Ngahahahhaaa.. Sorry Babe..

Aku habiskan semua credit yg baru aku top up tu tuk call dia. Habis gakla 30 hinggit aku sbb nk bercakap je. Nk cakap benda yg bodoh n mengarut lak tu. Mengganggu waktu kerja dia plak tu. Bukan aku sengaja tapi smlm otak mmg da weng giler. Tatau nk pk mende dah.. huhuu..

Hari ni aku wat keje balik setelah sekian lama aku cuti dari buat keje aku.. Turn out lama tak wat formulation, otak pun berkarat. Pastu aku jd malas sbb esok nk wat tikus lagi. Tengok keadaan cam can tuk ke kuantan menipis je. Tapi tgk gakla nnt, ne tau peluang tuk ke kuantan cerah ke. Lagi pun da lama kau tak berjalan2.. letih da.. aku mmg nk berjalan je skrg ni. Tp peluang itu cam tak nampak je gik.

Sabar.. eh.. sabar..

Aku sibukkan diri ari ni.. and start with a new exciting stuff.. Hopefully, aku blh lupakan masalah smlm. Hishhh dahla stressful week, tambah stress plak..

Huhuu...

Fark!!

Hari2 bekerja ngan Cik Ti da start.. I'll be so F'king busy n so F'king stressful

I couldn't sleep.
Maybe sbb td da tdo byk sangat.
Nak ol pun, yayang da sign out td.. so takde member nk bermanja..

Ada kawan aku.. ckp kat aku on my birthday clbration
"Dear, you look young, like 27"

I was like.. bullshit.. what the heck is that supposed to mean? Farkk.. don't tell me..

So aku simply reply,
"I am 27" and gv him the face.

Pastu derang sumer gelak tak hingat bagai nak rak. Sampai blk, lepas kawan tu hantar aku, aku dok tanya .. aku ni nampak da tua sangat ke?? Tetiba je teringat benda ni.. tu yg aku tulis tu.. sebab takleh nk tdo.. hahaa

Couple of days gak la dia amik nk apologize. Dia nye reason sangat simple. Dia bergurau. Dia kata mana bleh agak umur 25 ke 26 ke 27 ke.. Biasanya kalo org agak, dia akan kata late 20s or early 30s. Behtu??

Pastu bila dia tgh aku cam marah lagi.. dia tambah.. "But you look 27 last year."
Aku give him my middle finger.. Fark U
(aku buat bodo n pekak badak gak.. )

Huhuuu....

Badan ketul-ketul and six pack..

Chris Evan - What a hot stuff..

Chad Murray - One Tree Hill.. Sbb dia gak aku layan citer tu.. huuuhuu..

Ni tuk cuci mata yer.. muaahahhaa...

Papa Paul Walker.. huhuu.. hotzzz..

Aku mmg suka kat Dr Chase ni since the first time aku tgk dia kat House. Regret la dia called off the wedding the Jen Marrison tu. Padahal da sama2 cantik.. Aii lurvee..

Hari ni aku demam. Demam sebab tgh malam td aku tulis entry cakap aku benci ngan boss. Memang nyampah sbb dia suka bagi aku keje banyak2. Keje dia. Patutnya nnt kalo project PhD dia da siap.. takyah letak nama dia, tampal nama aku. Senang2 aku da dapat PhD sbb lebih 50% keje dia dulu aku buat. Sebab dia takmo nampak cam aku buat so dia upah orang2 baru ulang balik sumer keje aku. Bijak tak? Cerdik tak? Ulang balik keje tu sampai da 4-5 kali kot. Ermm lantak la..

Tapi sebab aku tensen, sebab aku stress, badan2 aku sakit2 sebab terpaksa duduk sebilik ngan Cik Ti the whole day, nak ditakdirkan aku demam. Sakit kepala macam nak pecah kepala. Bukan.. bukan macam migrain yg aku selalu kene tu. Sakit kepala ni macam bila aku baring je rasa macam kepala aku tu da nak pecah. Sakit giler. Dah 2 hari. Ubat biasa aku makan da takde, td suh my bro g cari ubat tu. Tapi da takde. Aku da telan panadol actifast 4 biji since pagi still tak hilang lg sakit kepala. Lepas makan panadol td, aku bantai tdo berselubung ngan selimut tebal, tutup kipas bagi badan berpeluh so fever aku blh pecah. So, lbh kurang kul 1 aku bangun ngan badan basah lencun. Maknanya fever da pecah. Tinggal sakit kepala and sakit perut je. Errkk aku tak citer aku sakit perut ehh. Sakit perut sbb hari 1st bulan mengambang. Dah lama aku tak layan sakit owang ppuan ni. Tp sbb aku demam kot, dia datang in package.

Sebab da terlalu lama tdo, aku tak larat nk tdo lagi. Aku dok tgk tv. Tak bley nk layan. So aku browse net. Aku dok layan video clip Amr Diab dari tgh hari td. Sampai la ni. Pastu browse gambar2 Dr Chase (House). Ermm tiba2 aku rasa mcm berminat ngan org badan berketul2 ni. Ni sume penangan Samuel Rizal semalam. Arghh.. kene rajin g gym pasni. Bukan nk work outla.. korang ingat aku rajin nk work out.. owh puhliss.. aku nk cari candidate yg berbadan chantekk..
p/s: yang, u kene rajin g gym blk.. bagi badan ketul2 sket, ada six pack. Huhuuu.. mesti sexy u.. aii like..

Ingat2 balik, aku tak pernah couple ngan org yg badan berketul. Yg ada six pack jauh sekali. Tp yg ada 2 pack kat kat depan tu adala. 1 tuk bahagian atas, 1 lagi tu perut yg menonjol kedepan. Ngalahkan ppuan ngandung pun ada. Tp tu dulu.. time sayang, so tak kisahla kan..:p maybe sbb tu gak skrg aku tertarik ngan manusia2 yg badan berketul2.. (aku letak tangan kat dahi... sah masih deman lagi.. so maafkan kata2 mengarut aku ni k)

Since aku cuti arini, so aku tatau nk wat aper. Mama takut aku kene denggi so td Mama masak sup ketam. Kalo org suspect denggi, adalah baik kalo dimasakkan sup ketam. So minum air dia byk2 k. So, nk dijadikan citer ketam tu tak fresh da.. so skrg aku menanggung akibatnya. Aku allergy seafood especially yg tak fresh. Dahla demam baru nk kebah, kepala macam nak meletup, perut ni memulas tak habis2 dapat plak lagi satu gatal2 kat muka n belakang badan aku. So satu combination yg sangat sempurna.

Ok, berbalik kepala badan ketak ngan six pack. Dah kata berkenan ngan org berbadan ketak wif six pack. Aku pun gatal contact kawan aku yg rajin ke gym. Citer ngan dia kegilaan aku. Tiba2 dia ckp, 'hati2 sket yg org yg badan2 ketak2 ni yang. Nampak cam lelaki tulen tp tak semestinya derang suka kat ppuan.'

Cisss.. merosakkan mood aku sungguh. So for those yg rasa badan dia ketak2 wif six pack.. jom kita kuar.. hahhaa.. nk gak rasa kuar ngan org yg badan ketak2 ni. Ada rasa bangga ke eh?? maklumla jalan ngan org yg berbadan sasa. Rasa selamat kah??

Dulu aku pk, kalo jalan ngan orang hensem mesti rasa bangga giler. So bla aku jalan ngan org2 hensem ni mula2 je cam best. Pastu trus rasa tak best sbb org dok tgk je kan. Bukan tgk aku.. tgk org sblh aku. Ciss.. tak beshh.. so biarla jalan ngan org yg berwajah bese2 je. rasa secure. Tp still aku nk rasa jalan ngan org badan sasa n ketak2 ni.

# Sebenarnya aku jeles giler ngan S. Amani peluk2 si Samuel Rizal dalam movie SAYANG tu. Cisss.. sangat menggugat keimanan gue..

p/s: Yang, cepatla build ur body tu.. hahaa... aii takmo 1 pack yg ngalahkan pregnant lady tu. okies.. huhuu

** Maafkan penulis atas kegilaan entry kali ni. Maklumla tgh tak brapa sihat. BUkan badan je.. ngan kepala2 hotak sekali weng.. Sowwy..

Wedding.. Wedding.. Wedding..

1st week,

Mama sibuk suh blk coz ada kenduri kene attend. Since skrg schedule quite packed so tgk keadaan baru aku blk rumah. Sampai rumah, I was so damn tired so bantai tdo. Mama ajak g kenduri. But… I’ve to passed.

The kenduri is my cozin’s engagement. Everybody was there xcept aku n adik2 ku. So, u know how the mouths kan.. So kiranya, they said nnt kalo turn aku bertunang.. they wont come. Hmm.. mcmla aku nk bertunang buat besar2an cam derang..huhuu..

2nd week,

Mom n Dad’s 29th Anniversary. So aku da arrange family dinner baikk punye. Sekalinya Nurul ada exam plak, dia tak balik. So dinner tak cukup corum. The next day plak, ktorg plan nk jenjalan ngan family. Turn out to be ada wedding kene attend. Anak sedara jiran sebelah rumah. Papa da janji nk pergi. Mulanya Papa suh Mama ngan ktorg je g, tp Mama takmo. So Papa terpaksa join sekali.

Habiskan masa kat wedding tu, then g bershopping2 tuk buat makan2 kat umah the next day.

3rd week,

Sabtu, aku dah start buat in vivo study so bermakna aku da deal ngan cik Tikus. Kalo da deal ngan derang ni sakit2 badan nk amik darah. Blom lagi keje2 mengemas bila da siap semua keje. On the same time plak, validation UPLC kene siap asap.

Baru blk dari lab, baru nk terlelap. Ada membe call tanya sal wedding jijoi plak. Pastu tak lama Amir plak call tanya pasal passport plak. Pastu Mama plak tanya bila aku nk blk. Esok wedding jiran aku. KENE BALIK! Arghh letihla..

4th week,

Tgh usahakan supaya aku dapat attend wedding jijoi.. Tp kalo tak dapat, minta mahafla joi ye..:D

***********************************************************************

Td, jiran aku kawin. A bit tense la sbb the pengantin is very muda yet da kawin. Well, as usual la ppl will ask mama n mom will shoot me. Owh plz.. No such questions plz.. da tiap minggu aku balik n tiap minggu tu gakla kene shoot. Matila kalo tiap minggu camni.

Plan nk g tgk citer Geng (upin ipin) ptg td, tp full house. So da alang2 bawa adik2 g tgk wayang. Ktorg tgk citer Sayang, you can dance. I hate the ending. I hate Amani tu blh peluk2 samuel rizal, I hate amani tu blh peluk2 sumer org.. Pokoknya aii tak suke.. haha

Citer tu ZERO in term of apa yg cuba disampaikan. Tp kalo takat nk tgk movie tuk gelak2, tuk layan body ketul2 samuel rizal yg sexy itu (owh gue da jatuh cinta tuk yg sekian kalinya pada dia), nk tgk aksi si Dafi dance vibrate2 dia tu.. boleh la tgk citer ni. layanla.. at least aku gelak sakan2 sampai hilang sekejap tensen kat kepala. Mak sukerrrr...

Ada 'kawan baik' yg aku kenal dari zaman degree bitau dia jumpa ex bf aku. Since dia kenal sumer ex bf aku n currently menjadi bf acah2 aku (hahaha.. lawakla bila ingat2 blk :p ), aku terpaksa tanya ex bf yg mana satu. Sbb mana aku nk tau dia cakap sal sapa kan.. hihii.. lagipun dia dok diarea yg memudahkan jmp org2 yg pernah terlibat dalam scandal aku.. muahaha..

As usual.. citer bosan.. (kan yang kan??) Nothing much... rasanya aku da start rasa tua. Aku da malas nk kuar. Maybe ni syndrome kot.. perubahan zaman dari remaja ke dewasa.. aiyooo.. rasanya da sangat tua.. walaupun kalo kuar ngan my sisters takdela org ingat aku tua sangat.. plg2 pun org kata umur dlm 25.. ahaks... :p

Biarla aku nk perasan.. da kang aku merasa diri tua.. korang kt aku giler plak.. haha..

Happy Monday Blues.. I hate monday. I hate my bos!

Girls talk - Part 2

It has been a while aii didn't even jenguk my blog. So kinda feel responsible to write something in this blog of mine. yeah.. but as usual.. no interesting topic to be discussed so the same old lame story u'll read. :p

Last Sat was my parent's 29th Anniversary. Happy Anniversary Mom & Pap, Love you guys whole heartedly!!

Ok, back to the girls talk..
Nothing pun just that, as usual these 'takdekejenyegirls' we having their girls talk. As usual, about boys, erkk man.. about masing2nye man, about money, cuti2.. and so on so forthla..

When it comes to my turn, aii usually passed. Hehe.. Bukan takmo bercerita cuma I don't hv things to talk about. Nk citer pasal aper?? erkk.. btw, my fren is getting married.. ermm.. my other friend is getting engaged.. so aper kene mengena ngan aii kan?? basically my cerita is all about 'owh shit, I forgot to shut down the system' or perhaps ' owh fuck, the boss caught me doing some other part time thingy'..

Nothing great about it. Let me read about u.. let me hear ur story.. Mine?? Nah.. not interesting at all.. Btw, I'm looking fwd to go to Bali.. soon.. soon.. but first I need a sponsor.. Anywan?? Having extra dollars?? you can simply bank in to me.. hahhaa..

Every single week ada wedding to attend.. Nak g Kuantan ke or Perak?? Pk.. Pk..

Girls talk..

We had this girls talk not so long time ago...
I wasn't really interested with what she's talking about so I dun really bother much...
I was busy writing on my old lpc..
Suddenly, (I've no idea how we get into such topic but..) she came about a gossip bout me..
Well yeah.. not like I'm an artist or glamorous or whatsoever but still when there's a single gossip about me, make my life sounds interesting..
Hell no.. trust me.. It is not!!

She said, = we were saying about ur avoidance behavior towards this marriage thingy when someone pop up the possibility of you r broken hearted..

Whoaaa... ppl nowadays are discussing my life..
Hmm quite interesting.. well of course it is coz I dun even damn know about it..
Ok, yeah.. i did avoid a wedding or perhaps two .. well ok.. quite a number but it simply because I hate to be distress later on being asking all such questions.. So please gimme a break!!

I raised my eyebrow n she said, = Yea..yea.. I know, it is not good to discuss some other ppl life but we love you. We r trying to help you.

Again I raised my eyebrow..

She added, = Hey, just listen first.. will ya?

I didn't say anything.. For God's sake.. Ok continue..

She nodded n say, = ok, then *toot* said, you will never broken hearted. Since it is merely human emotional. So broken hearted will be a big NO NO for you.

So? What am I? an angel?

Her face turned red as she saying this, = well, not exactly what he said but it is totally different from that. 180 degree different.

Owh, ok.. I think I know what he said.

She gave me this pity look, = But I know, you are not. Dun bother about it ok. Lets move on n have faith on some1. You cannot keep yourself this way.

I dun need your pity dear..

*********

Well, ok..
I dun wanna talk about this much..
But let me tell you..
I dun give a fuckin damn on what u said..
I know I'm bad..
I know I'm a fuckin bitch..
So WHAT??
Gimme a break.. will ya!!

life??

whoaa...
lama gler tak update.. lama gler tak ol..
I miss the virtual world... hahaa
OK..nop.. im not crazy ok.. just enjoying the moment.. ahakss..

Ok.. the truth is I'm freak out..
I'm 27 already...
ermm bak kata cozin2 aku yg kurang hajau..
umur da nak bau tanah.. cisss..

So hows life??
SUCKS??
No.. my life is beautiful..
walaupun orangya tak beautiful tp hidup beautiful.. okla tu.. jadila tu..
ahakss..

Ok.. cici merapu bla pala otk da weng ni..
so minta mahap.. minta hampun ye..

Bla otak aii da betul sket nnt i hapdet blk..

Arghh mencikkkk!!!

#Kumerinduimu.. tingtong.. (ingat tak iklan ni?? ahhahaa... sahla aku da weng wehh..)
Harap maklum..

Mengenangmu 2 years RIP

Mungkin ini memang jalan takdirku...
Pertemuan, Perpisahan lumrah kehidupan...
Cuma bagaimana kenangan-kenangan lekat dan tetap di hati dan minda yg membezakan pertemuan dan perpisahan tersebut..

"Dan izinkan aku, memeluk dirimu kali ini saja.. tuk ucapkan selamat tinggal untuk selamanya.. dan biarkan rasa ini bahagia untuk sekejap saja.."

Tapi sekejap pun aku tak dapat peluk, sekejap pun aku tak dapat tatap wajah itu.. Cuma suara yg aku dengar dari corong telefon pada saat2 akhir.. suara yg sampai ke saat ini masih terngiang2 di kepala..

Dan yang paling penting, dia bawa hati aku bersama.. sampai aku tak tahu kenapa hingga ke saat ini aku tak penah ada perasaan untuk settle down dgn mana2 lelaki. Mungkin waktunya belum tepat, mungkin orang yg sesuai belum ketemu.. tp aku happy dgn keadaan skrg. Kadang2 bf ada pun serabut pala otak.. at the moment, ai stay single and fabulous..

"Saat aku tertawa di atas semua..Saat aku menangisi kesedihanku.. Aku ingin engkau selalu ada.. Aku ingin engkau aku kenang..Selama aku masih bisa bernafas, masih sanggup berjalan, ku kan selalu memujamu.. Dengarkan aku.. Ku merindukanmu.."

U were there, at the worst time..

"Di malam yang sesunyi ini.. aku sendiri.. tiada yang menemani.. akhirnya kini ku sadari.. dia telah pergi.. tinggalkan diriku.. Hanya dirimu yg kucinta dan ku kenang, di dalam hatiku.. takkan pernah hilang.. bayangan dirimu.. untuk selamanya... Mengapa terjadi kepada dirimu? Aku tak percaya, kau telah tiada..."

SAAT TERAKHIR

tak pernah terpikir olehku

tak sedikitpun kumenyangka

kau akan pergi, tinggalkan ku sendiri

begitu sulit kubayangkan

begitu sakit kurasakan

kau akan pergi tinggalkan ku sendiri

dibawah batu nisan kini kau tlah sandarkan

kasih sayang kamu, begitu dalam,

sungguh ku tak sanggup, ini terjadi

karna ku sangat cinta

*

inilah saat terakhirku melihat kamu

jatuh air mataku, menangis pilu

hanya mampu ucapkan : slamat jalan kasih

satu jam saja, ku telah bisa, cintai kamu, kamu, kamu dihatiku

namun bagiku, melupakanmu, butuh waktuku seumur hidup

satu jam saja ku telah bisa, sayangi kamu, di hatiku

namun bagiku, melupakanmu, butuh waktuku seumur hidup

di nantiku

o.. oh…

Al-Fatihah for Arwah Iwan. It has been 2 years already, yet I still missing you darling..

Another loss in February

In the middle of the night on Feb 15, my housemate burst into tears. Then Eka came to me n tell me Putri is gone. She had an accident few weeks back n was in the coma state until last friday when her dad flew all the way from Jakarta to see her. When the girls went to visit her on Sunday, she even can hold Echa's hand. We were praying hard so that she can survive the misery. Got swollen all over the face, they hardly recognized her. Tears flow when they see the picture.

Obviously, we can't really hv a sleep for the whole night, and early in the morning I need to get up n go to the lab. Headache due to not enoff sleep. Waiting for the call from the family. Arwah died at Melaka Hospital and need to be taken down to Subang Bestari (her brother's house). We were expecting the arrival should be around 2pm but due to complication here and there, the deceased only reach the house at 5.30pm. The face is still bleeding so we can't see her face.

It was kinda flash back. If only I was there at Iwan's when he left.. I don't know how am I going to be very strong. The future MIL n FIL of Putri were there all along. Their son couldn't come due to exam he's having at the moment. Gosh.. though I don't know her well but I do feel the sadness inside me. I don't wanna cry. Never want to cry but the tears never compromise. I had it all the way till to the grave. Yea, I went to the grave site with more than 100 others.. 2 buses were provided by UiTM for the students. What a loss.. But we always expecting the best for her. Perhaps, this is the best for her. Allah loves her more..

To add the sadness, it almost 2 years Iwan went to see Allah. And in that 2 years, I can't really see what I want in life. Relationship is out of topic. Seeing the deceased being put in the grave, make me realize on my reason to be in this world. What I'm become? What I wanna be? What is going on with me?? I'm tired with all this play around thingy. I never expect the best but at least I could have a better life. Pray to Allah, that I can survive this test. I wanna stop my bad side of life.. Wish me luck.

Al-Fatihah for both of my friends..
My Do'a with you, love one.. I will always love you n always do...

Surprise for an old lady...

First n foremost...
Please congratulates by ex for his wedding this coming March...
Congrats.. Congrats...

Ok,
Yesterday was 15th of February.. a day after Valentine (erkk.. kinda confuse.. Valentine?? What the hell is that??? hahah). I was quite sure I wanna spend the whole sunday doing my research in the lab, when a friend of mine askin me out to had dinner together.. Remembering how much I've missed the moment of hanging out with frens, I didn't hesitate to say Yes n after changing my cloth (and make him wait for me more than half an hour.. hehe) we went to OU.

He was repaying for canceling the dinner he promised before n to celebrate my belated birthday.. (owh thinking about birthday make me feel older and older.. goshh how I wish I always 25 yo.. huhu). I didn't expecting anything when he wanna hv the dinner at TGI's Friday. Nothing come to mind at that moment. When he left me for a while, I was trying to recall when was the last time I hanging out with friends.. having a nice day out with guys.. like old days.. But trust me, I can't recall any.. which means, its been a long long long long long time ago... walah weiii.. what a pity desperate spinster I've been... NO WAYYYYY!!!! (btw this year has already put me in the spinster list.. goshh.. GOD please forgive me.. )

We had a nice dinner though.. I don't really favor TGI (u knew it.. from the very beginning kan?? what happened to me last time we had our breakfast at TGI!! yet still nk makan kat sana.) Didn't expecting anything.. after we had our dessert, suddenly the boys from TGI bring 2 pieces of cake.. I was like excited.. There's some1 celebrating birthday today.. but when one of the guy came to me and ask my name.. n askin me.. "It's your birthday??" I was speechless.. gv this kind of look to him.. n all he did was smiling.. At that very moment.. I really wanna kill you!!!

The boys asked me n the other Chinese boy to stand on the chair. I was given a bottle of tomato sauce and pretend as it is a microphone.. Holly, yeah.. they make me stand on the chair n give a nice speech to the audience.. I was so embarrassed ok!!!

They were singing.. and the same old tradition they had.. I was hoping things ended immediately.. malu sehh.. they ask us (me n that Chinese boy) to blow the candle (when they put the cake hell way from me!!!) Took us sometimes to blow it out of the fire.. They things just ended.. Owh.. how relief I've been..

Thank you dear.. Such a nice surprise I had yesterday.. I still hv some adrenaline around.. hahaa... Suddenly, I had on mind.. how old I am at this very moment.. Gosh, Cici.. kamu itu udah tua.. tua.. tua.. tua.. tua taukkk!!!!

Thanks again for that a week belated birthday surprise..

Ikmal!!!! where the hell hv u been hiding yourself????

Thank you from me...

For the past 3 birthday, the big day was celebrated in its own way. After my 24th birthday, I always get a very nice party.. Ermm.. byr balik kot the one year yg sangat teruk tersebut... huhuu..

Look back..
25th was at TC with KOS staffs... a great great great party ever...

The cake...

Birthday girl..

The housemates..

Kenangan sampai sekarang.. Wa.. I miss you guysssss!!!

The girls..

26th was at home with few ppl invited.. again such a great party.. for an old lady..hehe

Chocolate Indulgence - The Cake..

My lovely Papa..

My sista.. Eika.

Da foods... huhuu.. lapar...

The family..

27th was at Kenny Rogers.. On Papa's bill.. Thank you very much Papa..

Tiramisu - The cake

Si tue yg tak merasa tua.. aii rasa macam masih muda you...

The family..

The girls n parents..

Anak manja siapa??? Ya mama n papa donk..

What happened on 24th BD??
hehee.. Hanya Ady n him n me yg tau.. haha.. time tu sedih giler.. now lawak giler bila ingat2 balik..

First of all, as usual.. aii nak ucapkan jutaaan time kasih pada teman2 yg wish me.. Thank you very much friend.. I love you all.. Muahsss...
A special thanks goes to My Papa n Mama for throwing a birthday party fer me.. ahakss.. terasa spt kanak2 ribena ok...

Again, THANKS FOR ALL THE WISH OK...

Pull Out

I had a very good lesson today..
After all, things went smooth and research going well through these 2 days..
But, as usual b4 u had things went well, there must be lotz n lotz of problems all the way..
We had to submit the proposal by today erkk yesterday to be exact..
Boss didn't even spare a minute of his time to read mine.. (kinda VERY dissapointed ok!)
Luckily I sent a copy to Dr Nadeem and he helped me out on few aspects. He corrected the proposal. Huhu.. cannot harapla the boss.. All he knows, I must do the task n finish it within the time given.. arghh serabot...

Thinking of pulling out, but yet i don't want to waste all the time spent here for nothing. Kene sabar sket la.. but still don't know sampai mana tahap kesabaran tu.. dushhh...

Bila nk g pulau?? baru balik dari hutan nk sibuk nk g pulau plak.. adehhh....
Nahar!!! Kata nk sms aku.. mana???

Ekspedisi.. ke Ekspidisi??

UiTM's Center kat Taman Negara tu..

Boat kitaorg.. purple yuu..

Jetty.. dari Seberang..

Whateverla kan.. konon2nya nk bersatu dengan alam.. td nampak cam lebih ke enjoying Australian Open Championship kat TV je.. ahakss..

On canopy walk.. pendek je..

Ok, to start with.. Last trip was awesome.. Me very loikee.. tak berapa penat sangat since not much activity was done.. hehe.. Yg bestnya sbb trip kali ni adalah fully sponsored.. Aii ta kuar duit walau sesen pun kecuali time nk blk tu, aii beli kuaci n 100Plus.. hehe.. selain dari itu adalah ditanggung sepenuhnya oleh pihak yg sepatutnya.. ahakss

G Taman negara with the main priority was to get some sample for student's final year tp turn out to be sampling taken not more than 1 hr of our time..so the rest of the time is for leisure la.. best giler kan.. g sampling sejam.. tp trip to taman negara is like 3d2n.. huhuuu... walaupun kakiku sakit2 skrg ni sbb dok naik tangga banyak sangat.. tp amatla berbaloi.. makanan dia sedap2.. hehe..

Kat sana, sempat melayan gama Nadal n Verdasco yg sangat sengit.. sampai2 lepas dinner tak habis gak game tu.. Sibbaik time dinner tu blh lyn tgk dari jauh sbb kat hall ada big TV.. lepas makan malas nk layan the lecturers bersembang.. aii p join dak2 cina yg tgh masyuk layan game tu.. tp sbb tpt agak crowded.. aii excuse myself g blk tgk tennis sensorang sbb roomate dok sembang lg kat cafe...

Nadal menang tipis, Verdasco kalah bermaruah.. hehe... tp kemenangan Nadal sbb kecuaian dia.. sian dia.. Ok back to the trip.. guide ktorg sangat baik n aii very loike.. Semalam balik Shah Alam n reach here by 5.30pm. Lepas tu, terus direct blk Meru sbb the next day (todayla tu) ada wedding sepupu.

Kaki masih lg sakit2, pastu lupa bw flat shoes, terpaksala pakai heels time kat kenduri tu... owh penderaan kaki sungguh.. Jumpa few kawan2 n lotz of sedara mara yg susah sangat nk jumpa. Sume dok tanya bila aii nk berlaki.. sabar la dulu... One fine day ok!!

Girls.. & Pengantin..

My family n Pengantin

Nila dia pengantin baru itu..

The Gedikss.com

Tadi wedding berjlan dgn lancar.. very beautiful the bride n groom.. Just check the picture out k.

Td juga dok ralat melayan Final Game Nadal n Federer.. Nadal won the game dgn sangat bergaya sampai federer menangis.. tak tahan aii tgk.. but still m really happy. So sayang, janji tetap janji.. aii menang.. yu kalah.. belanja aii makan ok.. Not maggi... never maggi ok!!

Bos macam agak kureng sket.. gerenti kene marah.. itu adalah pasti.. tp lantakla.. kata kamikaze.. brani mati.. hehe.. so layankan esok.. kalo perlu gertak sket.. hehe

TAG??? Mende nih??

Aku baru tau kewujudan blog Nouq, itu pun setelah dijemput dgn segala hormatnya menjadi pembaca blog Onah.. Dan dalam aku 'ketahuan' tu... aku baru perasan aku telah di TAG.. amende tu?? Kla, since aku ngah bosan kat lab di hari cuti yg senyap sunyi ni.. aku pun rajin sket nk menjawab soalan2 tu.. hohooo

Every question is referring to 1 person
Wokies

1. What is the relationship of you and him/her?
Him?Her? Siapa? Siapa? Haihh confuse aii..

2. Your 5 impressions towards him/her.
Towards sapa?? adeh.. soklan camni aii takde jawapan kekdahnye.. pass..

3. The most memorable things he/she had done for you.
Lor yg ni sapa plak?? she? he? yang mana?? kalo tak kisah mana2, the most memorable things some1 ever done to me is when he sang a song time aku baru bangun tdo.. n the song tu plak ayat dia camni "Disetiap ada kamu....." sambung arr sendirik.. hahaha

4. The most memorable things he/she have said to you?
Ermm.. ni aku nk plh sapa ehh?? not he or she but THEY, when THEY celebrate my birthday kat TC.. I love you guys.. love u so muchhhhh!!!

5. If he/she become your lover, you will..
Uishhhh awat lempung sangat soklan, kalo da jadi lover sah sah la kawin.. takkan nk wat dosa manjang kot.. owh pliss dehh.. ahakss

6. If he/she become your enemy, you will...
Aii wat bodo je.. dah ramai pun yg jadi.. haaahaa.. bak kata orang, practices make perfect.. ahakss

7. If he/she become your lover, he/she has to improve on...
Sapa yg nk jadi lover aku ni?? meh sini aku tgk sikit rupa parasnya.. chewahhh

8. If he/she become your enemy, the reason is...
Yg jadi enemy aku skrg ni ke?? Yg da penah jd enemy aku sbb2 nya adalah.. betrayal.. hehe..

9. The most desirable thing to do on him/her is?
Adehhh.. aii peningla.. amende la question2 ni sumer.. fening tau...

10. The overall impression of him/her is...
Sapa?? Obama?? Ok kot.. ahakss..

11. How do you think the people around you will feel about you?
Ontah.. aii dun care n aii dun give a damn.. bleh gitu?? nk pk apa org rasa ttg aku blh giler wehh..

12. The character of you for yourself is?
My character?? Im a loner and sober.. ok??

13. On contrary, the character you hate of yourself is?
Refer to answer No 12

14. The most ideal person that you wanna be is?
PERFECT tak pun ALMOST PERFECT... boleh??

15. For the people who care about and likes you, say something about them.
Thank you for caring and liking me.. I love you guys...

16. Ten people to tag?
Aii dun wan to tag ppl.. tak suker..

17.who is no. 2 having a relationship with?
No one at No. 2.. so question will be left unanswered.. pass

18. Is no. 3 a male or a female?
He..

19. If no. 7 and no. 10 were together, would it be a good thing?
Dun think so..

20. How about no. 5 and 8?
Wehh... I'm not a matchmaker ok.. leave it..

21. What is no. 1 studying about?
No 1?? erkk.. ada ke?

22. Is no. 4 single?
No 4 aku kan ramai.. so mcm2la status derang.. bini orang pun ada ... hahaa (degil)

23. Say something about no. 6
No comment..

Ok.. itu sahaja...
Im kinda pissed off hari ni....with myself..