Key Ell.. I'm Here

How does it feel when you step on the place you've left for quite sometimes.. A place I miss, A place that I feel like hometown.. I miss this place so damn much.. I miss KL.. seriously!..

Went back to KL with Amir n Aloy. Then amir drop us at DJC . Went upstairs and I go into a deep sleep on the couch.. should I repeat? I was asleep on the couch bcoz aloy sleep in the room. I was so tired though appp asked me to sleep in the room. Nvm honey.. I'm gonna b ok.. :p

Call home early in the morning but no1 pick up the phone. Call my brother just to know that all of them are out to Melaka n only gonna get back on sat. I was really pissed off. Come on..their daughter is goin back for holiday, spare me some time please. They dun even leave the key. So even if I get home.. how on earth I'm gonna get in to that house.. I cried again.. after so many cry at Kuantan.. damn hell!!

Well, I went down KL with what I wear..n my lpc n my personal stuffs. Nothing more.. I dun bring any extra cloths or anything I can wear. How on earth I can stay here.. for 2 days wearing the same things.. you know. . uncomfortable it is.. Mite goin out with sum1 to buy sumthing to wear.. Walah...

In a way, I should be happy to spend more time with him.. you know.. though not that happy but okla than nothing.. miahahha.. I miss him so much gak kan.. (check my prev entry ok!!)

if only he knows how I miss him.. Even if he know sure he wont do anything.. In ur dream suci.. :p

Till then.. Im gonna mis u more n more darling.. :D tho u dun feel the same :(

Muahsss for my readers.. u may find this entry kinda disgusting.. hahaa.. i started to feel that way..

ntahla..

Suker giler bila hanya insan2 tertentu je blh baca blog aku.. bukan tak suka orang baca cuma suka akula nak tulis aper.. ni tak.. tak komen kat blog tapi komen bila chat..takpun hantar sms.. cam ****.

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Zi,
Nak aku citer sal kuantan ni tak?? Hehee

Okla.. kuantan.. its just a small town la.. takla besar cam KL tu. Takderla byk shoppin kompleks.. ada satu je pawagam yg takla segah OU nyer GSC tu.. taklah sehebat Cineplex.. cuma small GSC jer.. okla dari takder.. pastu ada kompleks teruntum yg dah takder pawagam teruntum.. "Oh pawagam teruntum dah lama tutup dik. Pawagam ada satu je kat Megamall..".. Punyala besar signboard dia.. takder dah rupanya pawagam tu..

Pastu ada Berjaya Megamall.. ni takdela ropa Berjaya Times Square tu.. Jauh sekali nak seropa ngan BST tu.. yg seropa pun.. ermm..title "Berjaya" tu jer la.. Megamall tu ala2 Centrepoint Klang je aku tgk.. pastu Kenny Rogers dia pun tak besh.. aku dah pangkah kedai tu.. tak beshh..

Ermm.. aper lg nak citer sal Kuantan ni??
Dah few days asik hujan manjang.. tak berenti.. aku dha nek risau2 kalo2 banjir.. dah la keadaan tgh sengkek giler ni.. rasa cam aper je... tak brani nak kuar malam2.. tapi dah brapa hari ni mmg blk malam manjang.. nak wat camne.. dah kat umah pun takder nak wat aper.. so lepak jerla kat lab ni..

Aku dah start mengajar td.. tetiba rasa cam mengajar ni tak beshh plak.. rasa cam ntah paper ntah yg aku g berenti kat UITM tu.. rasa cam aku rindu ngan mama ngan papa.. huhuuu :((
Time cuti takleh nak blk..sebab ada keje.. pastu takder duit lagi ni.. Ni pun eg yg banje ngan belas ehsan eg.. Thanks ehhh EG embam.. Eg embam sangat... :p

Zi,
Aku rindu... rindu sangat...

Kuantan...

Asal ehh.. asik citer sal kontan je.. sbab aku dah bosan sehh.. bosan giler..
This wiken nak blk KL..
Hopefully next week takder class.. aku nk blk KL
hehee..
till januari.. baru aku blk kontan blk..

Kuantan...I'm here..

Well, Alhamdulillah aku dah sampai Kuantan dengan selamatnya malam td around 7pm. Pastu ada operasi menyelamatkan kucing. Sampai tu memang penat giler tak hingat, tapi kene ikut dak2 g makan then tdo umah Rab.

Pagi ni report duty then aku baru tau, aku handle 3 classes which aku pun tak tau camne lg. Aku bosan seh kat sini.. huhu... nak balik KL.. :((

This week ni tak start class lg.. tapi da suh datang awal2... hampehss..

Huhuuu... Aku rindu...

Ptg ni nak setel rumah sewa.. hopefully setel arr.. Aku tinggalkan semua memories kat KL tu..tak bawa sini.. tapi ada gak yg ikut.. hampehs tul..
Td nazrol kol tanya lg sal aritu.. bosan beb.. :p

#Hapus aku...

Kuantan..here I come..

Bangun pagi2 tapi aku malas nak packing.. dok baca paper.. then baca blog orang, then layan jamil yg tdo ngan aku mlm td. Pastu hehee.. modified skit template blog.. then tulis entry ni.. hehehe.. in fact aku tak packing paper pun lagi.. muahahhaa...

Kla.. nak start packing.. kang ada plak yg tertinggal kang.. hehee..

Nway.. lepas ni tataula ada can ke tak nak apdet blog as rumah yg aku nak dok tu takder net lg.. kampus pun tak sure lg.. so tgk jerla nanti..

Till then.. Bubyess...

Stay Alert...

Went out to c cozin kat MV this evening, then Papa call suh bawa Jamil tgk wayang. So aku pun g Q pjg giler nak beli tiket. Aku nak tgk Deja Vu tapi ada budak kecikla plak.. so si Jamil nak tgk CicakMan, which aku rasa hampehss sangat citer tu. Aku mmg bosan giler.. dapat lak ngan mamat sengal dok blkg aku dok kicking kusi aku.. aku dah pandang blkg sekali stil tak reti bahasa.. nak kene aku sound gak baru nak berenti. Cam hampehss.. Time Q tu aku call sorang member, tanya if dia nak join tgk wayang.. Yerla.. da day b4 aku dah kuar ngan sorang kawan, pastu hari ni kene kuar ngan lg sorang. Kalo tak kang ada plak yg tanya apsal aku tak fair padahal both pun kawan jer.. huhuuu.. aperla nasib aku ni..

Bawa jamil ngan eika makan kat McD and tgk wayang.. kira cam dah lepas hutang aku. Hehee.. pastu balik 2 aku hantar member tu g FutsalPlanet kat Sunway b4 aku blk umah.

"Eii rasa cam nak ketuk2 je kepala dia. Apsal akak boleh sabar n diam jer yer ngan dia. Ika tak suka langsung kat dia. SIbbaikla..." Ayat pertama kuar dari mulut eika lepas tak bercakap sepatah pun since masuk kete nak blk tu.
"Mama kata, camne jahat pun orang kat kita..jgn bls jahat. Sabar. Akak sabar jerla." Walaupun rasa cam air mata dah bergenang kat kelopak mata. Tapi benda dah jadi.. there's nothing yg blh putar masa.

"Kalau aku tak dapat, takder sapa akan dapat." Wish I die early.. then ur wish will b true...

Tonite is my last nite ere.. Rasa macam malas nak g kuantan. Ntahla, skrg aku dah takder perasaan. Td Papa suh call tuan rumah tu, suh masuk gak umah tu esok. Tapi umah tu tak cuci lg. Camne.. huhuu..

Hati agak pedih hari ni.. agak sakit..

"Kenapa mesti nak kisah kalo orang dok sebut pasal x-bf dia / x-gf dia.. tu hak diala kan. Yg awak tu dok mention2 nama x-bf awak/x-gf awak.. saya tak kisah pun. Ada saya cakap aper2? Kenapa awak mesti cam nk perli2 kalo saya dok sebut sal x-bf/x-gf saya?Yerla awak tu sapa.. saya ni sapa.. " - Cam shialll nyer stetment.. hampehss

#HATI T'LAH LETIH.. terpulangla pada ko nak buat aper.. Jadikan aku ni cam bola kat padang.. tendang je mana2 suka.. kalo ada orang amik.. buat sampai orang tu tendang kat orang lain plak.. or perhaps tendang kat ko blk.. Aku layan baik.. ini yg aku dapat.. THANKS

Fun.. n.. Fun..

"Balik nanti mesti tulis blog la tu..." Yup..thats wut im doing rite now :p Suker arr nk buat aper..ihikss..


Yesterday was my off day. Thursday was my last day @UiTM 'dihati mereka'. Hanya UIAM dihatiku :p So wut I did was housekeeping work in the morning. Maklumla since Mama takder ni aku kemas ala kadar je b4 g keje.. hehee.. al maklum bgn lambat manjang.. ahakss.. Laundry pun dah 3 hari tak buat. So semalam aku setelkan sumer. My dad ni dia cam lain skit.. kalo rumah bersepah, jgn harap dia nak dok kat umah tu.. dia akan lepak kat umah my bro. Pastu Papa hanya akan masuk rumah bila dah betul2 ngantuk n dah nak tdo. So aku kenela kemas rumah tu untuk papa berehat2..hehe

Setel keje, aku g Shah Alam. Dah janji nak jumpa Yazi kat Sec 2. Tapi since bas dia lambat, aku g klang japs..cari barang which takder pun. Then, g jumpa Yazi kat Plaza Alam Sentral. As usual...hehe we did some window shoppin. Sibbaikla gaji aku tak masuk lg, kalo tak mau aku borong baju2 tu zi.. huhuu

Lepas beli benda2 yg mmg dah plan nak beli..hehe.. g makan kat KFC. Then jalan2 lagi tgk CD. Pastu aku hantar Yazi g USJ. Thanks 4 the time babe..

Direct g KJ LRT Station. Ada 2 accident along the way n jalan mmg so fcukin jem. Nyampah aku!! Sampai2 tak lama sangat aku tunggu, orang yg ditunggu sampai then trus g OU. Well, kalo aku tau dia pakai baju kuning aku pun takkan pakai baju kuning tu. Kecoh!! Apsal ehh, aku dah nak g kuantan pun sesaja je nak gaduh ngan aku :p

Jalan jammed gakla, pastu pusing2 cari parking..bisingla orang tu kata laparla, mengantukla.. mengada2 :p Dapat parking trus g Chilli's, then order makanan. Maybe sebab orang dah lapa so rasa cam lambat sangat derang prepare makanan tuh.. hehhee..

Lepas makan, aku g cari 'kasut', which actually bukanla kasut, aku cari sandal tapi cam dah terbiasa sebut kasut. Suke akula nak sebut aper. Pastu blh plak, nak buat2 cam tak kenal aku.. cam hampehss je.. Ala kalo kenal tinggal pun bukan dia dulik pun.. kawasan tu dulu 'TEMPAT DIA'.. retila dia cari jalan blk sendri.. huehuehue..

Dah penat pusing, tak jumpa benda yg dicari.. hantar dia g LRT blk, then aku nak blk umah. Teringat Eika kat umah makcik aku kat KJ tu. Dah alang2 kat situ call eika, dia kata nak blk..so aku g amik dia sat. Sekalinya makcik aku tahan suh lepak sana dulu. Lepakla sampai kul 8.30. Pastu baru blk umah.

Sampai2 umah, pala dah pening sebab kene hujan time amik eika tu.. then mandi n terus TDOOO.. Dah 2 hari tdo awal giler.. aku tdo b4 10pm..hehee..

Having fun ke? Okla.. spending time wif frens disaat2 terakhir ni.. hehe..

Hari I'm goin to spend sumtimes ngan my cozin plak.. this time kat MV. Pastu sekali nak bawa my sis n Jamil tgk wayang.. Lama janji ngan derang.. tak tunai2 lagi.. hehee..

# Pening pala kene prepare lab manual ni.. cam hampehsss

Arghhh...

Cam tak puas hati la.. aku tatau camne nak letak border pattern kat gambar. Semalam dok browse tutorial Adobe Photoshop tu.. aku reti nak letak border biar nampak cam menarik skit jer.. huhuu..

So ada sesapa blh ajar?? Tolong ehh.. :p

# Dizzy giler rite now... wondering how m i goin to drive in this condition.. Minta papa hantar kah? lalallalaaa

Last Day...

It's almost 2.45am tapi aku tak tdo lg. Aku baru lepas siapkan report tuk dipresentkan esok kat bos. Pastu aku akan angkat kaki meninggalkan UiTM di hati mereka. Hehehee..

Biasa last minute nyer keje.. aku dah pening.. lantak arr.. esok tgk je aku bgn kul bapa..

OKla.. nak tdo.. ada benda nak citer tapi.. malas nak type.. huhuu

Salah ke?

Nway, Mama baru jer sampai KLIA just now. Nak catch flite kul 7.50am. May Mama, Dayah n Nenek nyer journey smooth jer sampai kampung. :D

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I talked to sum1 last nite which really pissed me off. Ala skrg ni sumer benda pun cam nak nyakitkan hati aku jer pun. But if i really bother what ppl will think, I'm gonna die broken hearted. So who fucking care what ppl mite say. But still as menyuarakan rasa ketidakpuasan hati..hehe aku nak gak tulis..biar bagi lepas skit sakit jiwa ni.. huhuu

Wut my life would be? How do I know? Nobody knows wut gonna happen in the future and if I'm really thinkin about it.. im just wasting time coz m not gonna know anything. So why bother. Me is like roses petal yg dah tertanggal dari kuntuman rose tu.. so it depends on where wind will bring it.. hehee.. so tgkla nanti, if let say aku ditakdirkan akan setel down kat Kuantan.. then at Kuantan I'll be. If aku settle down kat KL..so aku kat KL la. Kalo aku kawin ngan tyo..hehe.. then I'll be kat Jakarta.. Muahahahaaa.. (lantak arr..suka aku nak tulis aper!)

To be honest with u guys, sapa tak rasa gembira bila tgk kawan bahagia tapi jauh di sudut hati, ada rasa terkilan sebab kita tak dapat merasakan kebahagiaan macam orang dapat. Maybe ada hikmah yg terselindung tapi kita tak tau. Kalau ada pun orang nak ngan aku, bukan aku tolak sebab saja2 suka2 je. It's becoz aku rasa aku cam takleh nak go on ngan orang tu. Well, orang kata tak kenal maka tak cinta. The thing is, cinta aku satu and aku takleh nak kongsi2. Though its not worth me anything pun to hv cinta yg camtu. Who cares? As long as I'm happy.. Happy yg sementara? As I said b4.. who cares?? Mite never think up to the serius part of relationship coz for sure it won't reach that far pun.. but enof as m enjoyin my life :p

So ppl, would u mind to watch wut u said as m gonna go out wif any1 i wanted to. I won't bother wut ppl say as I take it as a piece of crap.. Hello.. its my life.. it's my fuckinglife. DUn bother to giving so called 'opinion' which actually just a piece of crap.

Benci bila orang suka2 jer nak cakap aper.. Macam tau sangat aku ni camne.. cam tau sangat orang2 keliling aku camne.. huhuu

# mata dah bengkak..camne nak g keje.. t cam tau jer aku tgh berduka cita.. uhuhuu

Happy B'day Mom

Hari ni B'day Mama, but aku tak belikan paper pun for her. Ingat nak blk keje awal n nak makan kat luar ramai2. Sekalinya blk umah, takder orang.. they all dah kuar g makan sama2 dulu. Aku just prepare fish n chips for myself kat umah. Then derang balik and mama dah bz prepare barang2 nak bawa g Padang esok. Mama blk kg lagi ngan Nurul. Erm.. tahun ni cam aper je.. tak dapat nak belikan mama paper, hopefully next year will b better. Last year, aku dapat gak get her sumthing. Next year, aku rasa cam dah tau nak beli aper. Mama cam ada minat one cutlery set tu..memang nampak mewah.. aku pun suka.. tapi rege dia.. mak aihhh.. dekat 6 rat. Gilakk arrhh.. tu tunggu next year arr aku kumpul duit dulu.. hehee.. yer ma.. :D

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Pagi td, aku g keje agak lambat.Dahla aku mmg selalu lambat tapi pg td lambat giler2 arr. Pastu mmg aku pecut arr..kene sampai b4 9am.. hheehee aku gerak dari rumah kul 8.45am. Bantai lagi jammed kat susur keluar ke jalan shahpadu tu.. haru biru gak aku. Tapi takper.. menten cool.. hahahaa

Sampai kat tol, aku laju jer masuk lorong Touch n Go, pehtu aku tercari2 card aku tuh. Biasanya aku letak kat tepi pintu tu jer.. ni aku dah panic bawa kuar sumer benda kat lubang tu.. takder card aku tu. Merah dah muka aku.. pulak tu ada kete kat belakang dok hon hon... cam syialll...
Aku bagi signal derang reverse then aku masuk lorong sebelah.. Malu seyhhh.. tak hingat nyer.. Aku rasa cam malu nak ikut jalan tu lagi.. macam tak pernah lalu tol.. huhuuu... bengong.. cam hampehss..

Dahtu dah lepas tol tu aku cam pk2 mana p card aku tu. Dok ingat2 blk sapa pakai last.. sapa yg guna.. dia letak kat ner.. Bila ingat2 aku rasa cam nak menjerit.. Memang dah aku menjerit dalam kete tu.. sibbaik takder org dengar.. wahahhaa... siott jer.. dahla barang2 aku dia dok pandai2 alih2 plak.. ni yg nak marah ni.. sibbaik ada satu kete je blkg aku.. kalo byk bayangkan betapa malunya aku.. mencikkk... huhuuu (next time.. make sure org letakkan barang2 aku kat tpt yg aku selalu letak..)

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Happy birthday Mama,
I wish you all the best, a long life full of happiness and peace. I hope that you can achieve your dreams.
You are the best mom in the world; I am so blessed to have a wonderful, caring, supportive, successful, friendly and affectionate mother like you.
You always encourage me to achieve my dreams, you make me feel so special, and you are always there for help and advice. You are my inspiring close friend, I always pray for you.

Without you, I wouldn't be able to continue studying, when I had my relationship problem last year, you help me out n support me. I won't forget the concern and fear you felt about me, I will not forget that ever. I wouldn't succeed without your help. Your sacrifices make you a special mother; I wish I can be a mother like you one day.

May your birthday bring your way many precious moments , that you'll cherish as loving memories always , wish you a happy birthday .

I love you Mom!! So much that you can't never imagine...

Bonne anniversaire .
With my love,
Cici.

tekateki

"Kalau orang jepun g bulan, aper jadi?"
"Ntah" ni style orang malas nak pk n menjawab ni.. hahaaa

"Pk la, jawab jer aper2 pun. Kata orang science. Try dulu.. try." Huk olloh.. aper kene mengena science ngan teka teki ni. Hampehs!!
"Kira orang tu akan jadi orang Jepun pertama naik ke bulan!" :D hehehee

"Hahahaaa... hmmm betul tapi kurang tepat. Cari lagi.."
"La tadi kata jawab sekali jer. Malas arr. So aper jawapan dia?"

"ok ok.." senyum sensorang.. cam aper jek..
"aper dia?"

"Akan ...... toot....." hahahaa... both of us gelak.. lawak ehh lawak...
" Hmm... ok.. huhuuu"

"Ok, kalo orang africa plak g bulan. Aper jadi?"
"Kurang sorangla kat africa tu. Ermm.. 2 orang umatla kurang kat dunia nih." konpident!!

"Betul tapi masih belum tepat."
"Dah tu aper?"

"Pkla dulu."
"Malas.. jawab jerla"

"Hehee... ...... toot..... hahahaaa " Huwaaaaaaaaaa...

"OK ok.. ni anuar upgrade skit teka-teki ni.. dia tanya 'paksu-paksu, kalo orang south africa g bulan aper jd?" Aku dah malas nak teka... :p dah sah sahla jawapan dia cam aku takleh nak pk dah. Maklumla aku dah tua n takder jiwa kanak2 lg.. :p
"Aper?"

"Ni jawapan standard budak2 arr.. try la pk dulu."
"Malas arr.. jawab jerla.. huhuu"

"...... toot..... Hahaaa"
Huwaaa... hampehsss

Aku adalah manusia yg paling tak creative.. teka teki ni.. cam aper je.. aku tak pandai nak teka2 ni.. hehee..
Tapi... ermm biarla aku tau sendri.. :p

Jawapan tuk soalan2 tu.. korang cari la sendri
hahaa... Yg dah tau.. dah g main jaoh2.. jgn nak buat bising kat sini... hehee

3 full days...

Hmm.. excited but too tired to type.. hehee

Lets start on Friday - day 1 - G kontan ditemankan seorang kawan yg baik hati nak temankan n drive all the way.. heehee. - THANKS VERY MUCH!!. Sampai kuantan, dah dekat nak solat jumaat so kelam kabut cari masjid/surau.. ermm.. tak diberitahu ehh yg ktorg taktau jalan nak g kontan sebenarnya tapi sibbaik la.. member tu ramai member kat seantero dunia ni.. so senang jer dia tau direction. Sampai UIA mmg sunyi sepi.. takde org lagi.. so aku pun cuma masuk tgk kampus then lari kuar UIA blk cari surau. Jumpa surau tapi takder parking.. time tu dah bang yg kedua.. kira cam dah nak semayang dah tu.. kawan aku tu pun aper lagi.. parking je kete kat tepi tu then terus lari kuar.. time dia amik semayang, imam dah start solat. Dengan keadaan hujan renyai2.. basah suar dia.. hehee.. sian dia..

Then, lepas semayang nak g makan kat kontan. Kawan tu teringin nak makan KFC so g la cari Kuantan Parade.. tapi tak jumpa pastu tanya member2.. derang suggest suh g megamall.. So ktorg pun p la cari.. berpusing2 gakla kat kuantan tu. Dah jumpa building nak parking plak satu hal.. bosan tul aku.. kuar je parking.. terus cari tpt makan.. mula2 nak makan KFC, last2 makan Kenny Rogers Roaster yg tak brapa sedap tu. Hampehss..

Lepas makan and nak blk UIA dah..tatau jalan nak blk.. dah jalan2 pusing2 kat situ gak.. pastu call eg suhh amik.. trademark.. bangunan hijo..which kat kuantan tu byk giler bangunan ijao.. kan eg kan?? hehee. Penat2 EG cari ktorang tapi akhirnya kitaorg sampai gak kat UIA dengan selamatnya. Aku tinggalkan app kat bawah, aku naik setelkan all the registration stuffss.. Setel jer, aku ikut EG g tgk lab2 yg konon2nya byk n meriah tu.. AKu sedih... derang tak hbs unpack lagi.. huhuu..

Hbs keje, Nazrol Moin n Daus ajak g makan kopok kat kuantan.. derang banjer.. ye ye... hahaha.. pastu cari rumah kat area Indera Mahkota 15. Aku dah berkenan ngan satu Semi-D nyer rumah ni.. besh2 .. tak sabar nak melepakkan diri kat situ.. ahahaa..

Sampai rumah dalam kul 11.30 kot mlm tu. Lepas kene bebel suh mandi.. baru aku g mandi.. then tdo.. huhuu

Saturday - 2nd day - Bangun tdo layan tgk citer Las Vegas.. ehehee.. Pastu dah dekat tgh hari aku siap2 g kenduri Aan. Then g amik EG.. aku tak ajak pun app.. hehe.. mana tau dia nak ikut ke kan.. sorry ehh i really ingat u nak g tgk guitaristore tu.. balik kenduri tu ktorg g Care4, then belikan KFC tuk org yg mengidam KFC. huhuu.. pastu aku duduk kebosanan dalam rumah.

Lepas magrib app ajak g cari DVD n makan.. tapi dah sampai dalam kete, CDOrian call ajak dia main futsal n dia WAJIB pergi.. terus dia lari naik jap n amik barang2 futsal dia.. so again aku duduk kebosanan tgk derang main futsal.. what a boring day..

Blk dari tgk derang main futsal, lepak kat Pelita.. layan those guys melawak2 dgn lawak2 antarabangsa derang tu.. hehee.. then lari g 'PortCreek' (:D) plak.. Mike nak shopping.. huhuhuu..
Aku dah pening pala dah time tu.. tapi boleh jalan lagi.. skalinya sampai kul lepak bapa kat luar tu... pala aku dah tak blh compromi.. sumer benda aku nampak berpusing.. so terpaksala again menyusahkan orang.. minta maaf ehh

Tak mandi pun mlm tu terus tdo.. 'Eiii busukla.. tak mandi'

Sunday - 3rd day - Bangun tdo layan Las Vegas lagi, then siap2 g kenduri Aini Mazlan.. Selamat Pengantin Baru Aini n Mael. Pastu aku terus blk umah.. hehe.. sekarng tgh mengadap lpc aku ni.. huhuu.. rindu...

Tu jerla kot 3 days journey aku. Thanks a lot to those yg terlibat secara langsung n tak langsung or terpaksa terlibat.. hehee..

I'm gonna miss you!!!

# Zi, Happy Birthday !!

* Buat bodo je... Dah buat bodo tapi jenis tak reti bahasa..susahla...

Hey...

Nway.. I'm feeling better today..

Hopefully, I wont do anything stupid..

I wont be around today as I'm going to Kuantan fer a while..

Z, i'm lookin forward to see u this wiken k!

Erm... thanks for accompany me g kontan :D (Ada driver...ihiksss..)


# After few days... I shud be ok..

Andai ku tahu...

Datang kerja pagi td cam takder semangat langsung.. like sumthing stuck.. ada yg tak terlepaskan. Lunch nak kuar makan ngan Mr H. Alhamdulillah walaupun aku reject dia tapi dia ttp anggap aku macam kawan. Still nak berkawan.. Thanks...

Tengah hari b4 lunch chatting ngan kawan2. At one point, aku rasa cam sesak dada bila ada orang tanya benda hilang time aku datang 'opis' dia. Benda yg hilang tu dalam bilik keje dia plak tu and aku tak jejak kaki pun dalam bilik keje dia time 'lepakking' kat sana. Cuma soalan dia tu seolah2 menuduh aku buat sumthing yg sangat besar. SANGAT BESAR. Barang yg dituduhnya aku curi mula2 tu pun bukan mahal sangat.. aku boleh ganti 10 kalo dia nak. Tapi soalan tu cam syialll jer.. Mula2 tuduh baik punya.. aku datang opis dia time dia takder.. bantai arr aku blh baca niat BAEK dia tanya soalan2 macam tu... lantak arr suka ati diala..

Then petang tu.. memang aku dah malas nak ol.. satu hari takder mood. Plus sakit hati aku tak ilang2 lg. Then aku dah malas mengadap formulation tu.. aku ol blk. Chat lagi ngan yg kononnya 'kawan' tu. Makin buat sakit hati jer.. Kali ni aku cam hilang punca apa pasal dia ber'kawan' ngan aku n jadi 'kawan' aku.. JACKASS.. Biasanya benda yg dah terjadi.. kita takkan menyesal sebab dah jadi.. no regrets.. tapi kali ni.. aku mmg menyesal giler2.. How I wish aku tak kenal dia langsung.... Dan tak sangka.. kawan2 yg aku ingat betul2 baik ngan aku pun.. lebih kurang je.. THANKSSSS A LOT!!!

Aku mmg dah tahu dari dulu.. ramai yg remind.. Tapi itu pengajaran.. Langit tak selalunya cerah.. Tapi one thing yg aku tahu.. lepas ni jaga hati sendri.. takyah nak jaga sangat hati orang.. walaupun macam mana baik pun kita jaga hati org.. kalo hati tu dah hitam berkarat.. takkan kembali bersih putih... Tak payah berlembut hati tak kisahla kat pompuan ke lelaki ke.. kalo dah nama dia human being tu.. lebih kurang je.. baik keje ngan tikus.. kalo dia marah.. sah sah dia gigit.. kalo dia baik.. dok diam je dalam cage tu.. takderla kalo marah tapi tunjuk baik.. pastu dendam penuh sebakul.. Scumbag!!


# The dumb and dumberer...

**Sorryla.. entry arini mmg agak emo skit..

Facts bout gurl..

1. When a girl says she's sad, but she isn't crying, it means she's crying in her heart.

2. When she ignores you after you've done something wrong, it's best to give her some time to cool down before touching her heart with anapology.

3. A girl can't find anything to hate about the guy she loves (which is why it is so hard for her to 'get over him' after therelationship's over.)

4. If a girl loves a guy, he will always be on her mind every minute of the day, even though she flirts with other guys.

5. When the guy she likes smiles and stares deep into her eyes, she will melt.

6. A girl likes to hear compliments, but usually not sure how to react to them.

7. When a particular guy flirts with a girl very often, a girl would start thinking the guy likes her. So if you treat a girl just as a friend, go easy on the smiles and stare ok?

8. If you don't like a girl who likes you, break it to her gently.

9. If a girl starts avoiding you after you reject her, leave her alone for a while. If you still treat her as a friend, talk to her.

10. Girls enjoy talking about what they feel. Music, poetry, drawings and writing are ways of expressing themselves (which explains whymost girls like writing journals).

11. Never tell a girl that she is useless in anyway.

12. Being too serious can turn a girl off.

13. When the guy she likes calls her for the first time, the girl may act look uninterested during the call. But as soon as the phone is back on the hook, she will whoop with joy and immediately start telephoning her friends to spread the news.

14. A smile means a lot to a girl.

15. If you like a girl, try making friends with her first. Let her get to know you.

16. If a girl says she can't go out with you because she has to study, leave.

17. But if she still calls you or expect a call from you, stay.

18. Don't try to guess a girl's feelings. Ask her.

19. Hearing the words "I love you" is a great reassurance to a girl that she is beautiful.

20. After a girl falls in love with a guy, she'll wonder why she never noticed him before.

21. If you need tips on how to flirt with a girl, read romance stories.

22. When class pictures come out, a girl would first check who is standing next to her crush before actually looking at herself.

23. A girl's ex-crush will always be in her memory, but the guy she loves now stays in her heart.

24. Girls love having fun!

25. A simple 'Hi' can brighten a girl's day.

26. A girl's best friends usually know best what she is feeling and going through.

27. Girls hate it when a guy pays attention to them just to get close to their 'prettier' friend.

28. Love means devotion, caring and happiness to a girl, in that order.

29. Some girls care about looks, some care about brains, but ALL girls want a guy who will love and care for them.

30. Girls want nothing more than to feel loved.

31. Girls always hope that they can always remain as friend with their ex. But never know how !

# Well... its explained everything... :D

Lasagna..

Aku tgh surf cari recipe tuk carbonara td..tetiba nampak recipe yg mmg dah melekat kat pala otak ni.. AKu rindu nak masak lasagna.. tapi malas.. hehe.. lagipun selama aku masak kat umah ni takder sapa nak makan.. dulu kalo masak ada classmate yg nak makan.. I miss those moments.. hopefully nanti pindah kontan, aku akan rajin masak lasagna tuk member2 aku.. hehee (macam ader je barang2 dapur nak masak.. hahaa)

Hmm.. nak jdkan carbonara tu creamy, kita just perlu letak cream je... or boleh gak letak susu but kene masakkan skit sampai dia pekat.. senang je ehh..

Lasagna... Lasagna... Lasagna... Nak makan lasagna.. huhuu..

Unanswered called, Unreplied message..

I know it's gone and there's gonna be violence
(Want you to love me)
I've taken as much as I'm willing to take
(Want you to be)
Why do you think we should suffer in silence
(The heavens above me)
When a heart is broken, there's nothing to break
(Eternally)

Last nite.. after wut happened.. I got a call.. from the screen I knew the caller and I decided not to answer his call. Few times gak he called me. Aku buat bodoh je.. its almost 11.30pm,, bior dia pk aku dah tdo..

But then, ada sms masuk. Satu dari kawan yg suh tgk DEWA kat Astro Ria. Aku pedulikkan.. aku tgh ol :p maleh nak layan dewa time2 camtu.. ada rasa cam sedih skit.. yer arr baru lepas kene marah kan. Aku cuma tgk tyo dari you tube je..Satu lagi dari Mr H. Mula2 aku balas ok je..

Sampai satu tahap soalan2 cepumas dia.. aku cam lemas sekejap. I do expect he will ask me such question but I dun expect that soon. Anyway.. msg tu aku malas nak jawab.. then he called me again n aku tak answer pun dat phone call.. coz I know wut he will ask n I;ve no answer for his Q.

"I honestly hope you can answer me. Coz I really hope that you can be the suitable gurl 4me @ my soulmate.."

The whole nite cam takleh nak tdo. Padahal I can always say.. 'I'm sorry' or anything yg suitable la.. but I kinda lost last nite. I was wondering why he likes me in d 1st place and I'm after som1 else.. You see thats the problem here.. when I never be thankful (as sum1 mentioned..). He such a nice guy la.. (selama aku kenal dia la..) but the fact that I'm afraid will torn his heart into pieces is my biggest problem. In fact, no one pun will be okay with that matter.. tapi nak wat camne...

Though I don't know y I'm doin all this n that.. but the temporary satisfaction is enough.. maybe thats the price I've to pay for wut I've done. I've no regret on that coz, I learned from my mistakes.. Wish I will be forgiven by whoever he mite be..

What did they say again ? something like if u love an eagle let it free, if it comes back it was meant to be?

Well its very true.. I did it twice, n they come back.. but @ the moment they came back.. I'm no longer hv heart for them.. for what they've done.. n wut I've done.. so I've decided to stick with whoever I want.. no matter wut.. but then.. I just realize.. If I dun like sum1, I tried my best to show rejection in the very nicest way.. n perhaps I'm facing one right now.. hehe..

Tak kisahla apa2 pun.. lagi 2 minggu aku akan tinggalkan KL.. I'm gonna miss KL.. hehe.. tapi raya haji nanti aku blk lagi..ihikss.. So far aku belom bosan lagi dok KL.. hehe. lainla kalo orang dari mana2 ke kan.. tu sure bosan kalo dok KL lama2.. :p

My bad..

Aku baru blk dari PC fair wif Ap, Oni n Zainor (camni ke eje nama die..hehee). Okla, dah 2 minggu aku cam bebas walaupun the price that I've to pay kinda too much for me. But its worth it la. Even now aku ol guna my new D-Link wireless router. Hehee.. takyah nak sambung2 wire dah.. Ahakss..

Balik dari KLCC, they ajak g makan kat Big Plate. Well, dah dekat ngan umah dah tapi percaya tak.. aku tak pernah makan kat sana lagi. Taim hantar derang tu.. macma rasa nak join tapi time tu dah kul 9.15 which dah lepas curfew pun. Ap suh call mama, konon minta permission blk lmbat arr..tapi aku cam dah dapat agak aper jawapan mama.. I did call her but aku cume dgr omelan2.. je.. So aku kata.. aku akan blk skrg.

Drive cam pelesit bak kata..ermm sapa ehh kata.. :p kat simpang after traffic lite tu ada roadblock.. diorag suh aku stop n bukak bonet.. ala.. muka innocent cam aku ni pun nak periksa gak.. hampeh je polis2 tu.. aku ni kan warga yg baik.. so aku buat je aper derang suh.. setel.. (dah kata aku tak buat salah paper.. so derang nak charge aku aper.. hehe) aku pecut blk umah.. Jalan kat tempat Altantuya kene bom tu.. drive sorang2.. cube bayangkan. eii. aku bantai drive 130kmpj.. dahla rim blkg kete tu dah bengkok mmg rasa la agak goyang kalo bawa laju.. huhuu..

Sampai umah, mama dah tunggu depan pintu.. salam tangan, cium pipi pun mama buat dek jer.. huhuhu... dah seminggu tak bercakap sangat.. pastu ni aku buat hal lagi. Mau plan g Kuantan tu tak jadi. Aku masuk blk jap.. setelkan hal reload2 orang2 ni.. then.. mama panggil. Kene dgr omelan2 pasal anak dara blk lmbat n all stuffs. Aku rasa cam ermm.. ntahla..

Setel kene marah2 sumer.. ada orang call.. aku baru je nak bukak D-Link yg baru dibeli tu.. hehee..so sembang kejap. ngadu kene marah.. ahakss.. aku set kan kat pc belakang router tu.. now aku dah blh pakai kat bilik aku... hahaa.. (

Sedih sebenarnya.. sangat sedih.. tapi nak wat camne.. huhuuu...

# Mom sorry again.. Pa, I'm really sorry...

How does it feel?

How does it feel when you love some1 that never love u in return?
How does it feel when people say they be your friend because of symphaty?
How does it feel when you want it so bad but you couldn't get it?
How does it feel when you want it that way but it turn to be d other way around?

Whatever it is..
Just go on with life despite wut happened...

# I miss you.. Mom

I'm sorry Mom

I get back a bit late today. Evryone seems can’t wait to go back so I’ve to cover their job as I went out to UIA this evening n got back around 4.30. Well, I don’t really care.. whut mind me now is the environment in house. I feel like running away again. Demm..

I got back home n I’m so damm tired but whut I got was ……. I’m seriously thought that I gotta get the hell out of the house ASAP!!

But the sucks news I got was, I only need to go to Kontan after Dec 17. Then?? What am I to do till the date?? Mom still rarely talks to me. Do I need to cry everynight bout it. Or shud I just let it be? It’s really wrong when I get back a bit late. It’s really pissed her off. I’m sorry Mom…

Could have this kiss forever....

Aku letak status kat YM cam title entry ni tadi.. dah aku tgh dgr lagu tu.. saja jerla.. Sekalinya ramai lak tanya asal aku jiwang.. Adeh..nak jiwang pun takleh :p

Td eg call, suh g amik cek esok. So perhaps esok aku dapat meluangkan masa g UIA kejap amik cek tu. Then blk sambung keje.. sempat ke..takut jd cam aritu.. haru aku.. huhuuu

Td g keje naik BGX. Dah lama tak drive BGX, sejak aku dah bawa WNK ni.. aku cam lupakan BGX plak.. sian dia. huhuu.. tadi aku pun bermanja2 ngan dia. Dah sengal biasa bawa WNK signal belah kiri.. aku pun bantai bg signal kat belah kiri gak.. aper lagi.. wiper pun bergerak.. dan aku yg kalut ni pun.. cam hampehss je.. hehee

# Aku ingin engkau selalu.. Hadir dan temankan aku.. Di setiap langkah dan meyakini aku.. Kau tercipta untukku

Love

Love is never saying goodbye, but hello
Love is never questioning another motives
Love is admitting when you're wrong
Love is never doing any harm
Love is trusting with all your heart & soul
Love is kind, patient, loyal and true
Love is loving all that one may do
Love is loving ones faults as well as ones good
Love is never having to lie or be sorry
Love is never having to live a lie
Love is holding your heart forever
Love is growing old together
Love is happiness
Love is joy
Love is feeling this pain when i must leave you
Love is eternal
Love is loving you from afar
What a shame it is, you won't let me love all of you.

My Love..

Someone I Love

You're still in my brain

You're causing so much pain

I still can't believe

You used my feelings

For your foolish game

Named love

Held you close in my arms

Felt so nice and warm

I gave you my love

I gave you my heart

I gave you all

I had nothing back except

Pain that's driving me insane

You are still in my heart

My love for you will never die

My thoughts will always be with you

And the pain I feel inside will always

Reminds me of someone I love..

Aku takkan memiliki

Kau di hatiku
S'lalu menjadi pujaanku
Kau di jiwaku
Mengalir di dalam darahku
Yang terdalam
Yang sama pernah kurasakan
Yang terindah
Yang takkan kulupakan

Tapi takkan ku miliki
Semua cinta di dirimu
Karna kau telah memilih
Satu cinta teman baikku
Ku tak ingin
Hancurkan rasa di hatimu
Ku tak ingin
Hancurkan persahabatanku
Kau memulai
Dua cinta yang kau jalani
Dan tak akan
Kuharapkan cintamu

Aku takkan memiliki
Semua cinta di dirimu
Karna kau telah memilih
Satu cinta teman baikku
Semua kan jadi kenangan
Yang tersimpan dalam hidupku
Yang takkan pernah terjadi
Saat cinta seperti dulu

Tapi takkan miliki
Aku takkan memiliki
Tapi takkan miliki
Aku takkan memiliki

# Things will b complicated when we make it that way... but at this moment.. I don't know how to make it simple & easy...

**Cinta Tak Bersyarat**

Tak ada sedikitpun sesalku
Tak bertahan dengan setiaku
Walau di akhir jalan
Ku harus melepaskan dirimu

Ternyata tak mampu kau melupa
Dalamnya cintaku yg hebat
Hingga ada alasan bagimu
Tuk tinggalkan setiamu

Demi nama cinta
Telah kupersembahkan hatiku hanya untukmu
Tlah kujaga kejujuran dalam setiap nafasku
Karna demi cinta
Telah kurelakan kecewaku atas ingkarmu
Sebab kumengerti cinta itu tak mesti memiliki

Andai saja bisa kau pahami
Layaknya arti kasih sejati
Karna cinta yg sungguh
Tiada akan pernah mungkin bersyarat

Ternyata tak mampu kau melupa
Dalamnya cintaku yg hebat

** Andai Ku Tahu **

Andai ku tahu
Kapan tiba ajalku
Ku akan memohon Tuhan
Tolong panjangkan umurku

Andai ku tahu
Kapan tiba masaku
Ku akan memohon Tuhan
Jangan kau ambil nyawaku

Aku takut akan semua dosa dosaku
Aku takut dosa yg terus membayangiku

Andai ku tahu
Malaikat-Mu kan menjemputku
Izinkan aku mengucap kata taubat pada-Mu

Aku takut akan semua dosa dosaku
Aku takut dosa yg terus membayangiku

Ampuni aku dari segala dosa dosaku
Ampuni aku menangis ku bertaubat pada-Mu
Aku manusia yang takut neraka
Namun aku juga tak pantas di surga

Andai ku tahu
Kapan tiba ajalku
Izinkan aku mengucap kata taubat pada-Mu

Aku takut akan semua dosa dosaku
Aku takut dosa yg terus membayangiku

Ampuni aku dari segala dosa dosaku
Ampuni aku menangis ku bertaubat pada-Mu

# Baru nyampe dari Indo, tadi sore jadi kayaknya aku masih tired berat nich. Jd nya crita dia Indo disimpan dulu.. ntar kalo udah agak lega napasnya.. pasti deh diceritain.. paling nggak ya.. cerita lewat foto aja.. :D

Best giler lagu ni dari Ungu.. much better than Pintu Sorganya Gigi.. ihikss

*I couldn't get benda yg orang pesan tu.. tapi my cayang mayang.. abang2 sepupu n kakak2 sepupu yg carikan.. thanks banget dehhh

Hapus aku....

Kutuliskan kesedihan
Semua tak bisa kau ungkapkan
Dan kita kan bicara dengan hatiku

Buang semua puisi
Antara kita berdua
Kau bunuh dia sesuatu
Yang kusebut itu cinta

Reff:
Yakinkan aku Tuhan
Dia bukan milikku
Biarkan waktu waktu
Hapus aku…

Sadarkan aku Tuhan
Dia bukan milikku
Biarkan waktu waktu
Hapus aku…

"dan seterusnya rasa ini selalu terjadi
dan tak pernah berkurang
hatiku hanya untuk dirimu
aku bahagia hanya bila kamu bahagia"

Tanpa Kekasihku

Langit begitu gelap, hujan juga tak kunjung reda
Ku harus menyaksikan cintaku terenggut tak terselamatkan
Ingin ku ulang hari, ingin ku perbaiki
Kau salah,kau kubutuhkan
Beraninya kau pergi dan tak kembali

Dimana letak surga itu
Biar kugantikan tempatmu denganku
Adakah tanda surga itu
Biar kutemukan untuk bersamamu

Kubiarkan senangku menari di udara
Biar semua tahu kematian tak mengakhiri
cinta..

Apalah artinya hidup tanpa kekasihku
Percuma bila aku disini sendiri

Kekasihku, bersamamu
Kekasihku, bersamamu
Kekasihku, bersamamu
Kekasihku, bersamamu
Kekasihku, bersamamu

Cinta...

cinta..kita takkan menghargai jika tak memilikinya..
cinta..kita takkan merasa jika tak memberi..
cinta..kita takkan melihat jika bukan keindahan..
cinta..kita takkan memiliki jika tak diluahkan..
cinta..kita takkan yakin jika kita cemburu..
cinta..cinta takkan hadir jika bukan kerana cinta..

# Eheh.. ter'jiwang' lak petang2 camni.. huhuuu

Joy Enriquez - How Can I Not Love You

Cannot touch, Cannot hold, Cannot be together
Cannot love, Cannot kiss, Cannot love each other
Must be strong and we must let go
Cannot say what our hearts must know

Chorus:
How can I not love you
What do I tell my heart
When do I not want you here in my arms
How does one walks away
From all of the memories
How do I not miss you when you are gone

Cannot trip, Cannot share sweet and tender moments
Cannot feel how we feel, Must pretend it's over
Must be brave and we must go on, Must not say
Wat we no longer long

Chorus:
How can I not love you
What do I tell my heart
When do I not want you here in my arms
How does one walks away
From all of the memories
How do I not miss you when you are gone

How can I not love you

Bridge:
Must be brave and we must be strong
Cannot say what we no longer long

Chorus:
How can I not love you
What do I tell my heart
When do I not want you here in my arms
How does one walks away
From all of the memories
How do I not miss you when you are gone

How can I not love you
When you are gone


# How can i not love you.. when you are gone.. when you are far away from me.... uhukkss.. uhukss...

Sudah...

Salahkah aku
Mencintaimu
Memilikimu
Menyayangimu

Jangan paksakan kita untuk
Slalu bersama
Jangan paksakan kita untuk
Slalu mencinta

Salahkah aku
Mencintaimu
Memilikimu
Menyayangimu

Bila kita harus berpisah, sudah
Biarkan ini semua berakhir, sudah
Cinta memang tak harus milikki iya...

HAPUS AKU

Kutuliskan kesedihan
Semua tak bisa kau ungkapkan
Dan kita kan bicara dengan hatiku

Buang semua puisi
Antara kita berdua
Kau bunuh dia sesuatu
Yang kusebut itu cinta

Reff:
Yakinkan aku Tuhan
Dia bukan milikku
Biarkan waktu waktu
Hapus aku…

Sadarkan aku Tuhan
Dia bukan milikku
Biarkan waktu waktu
Hapus aku…