Seyes.. tensennnn

Esok ada kelas yet hati takmo kompromi..
takleh nk study la ni..
Nak deliver camne esok..
Bengangnya.. asalla bangang sangat cici oiii!!!
Hati belum sekuat itu lg..
Dah sah sah akan terluka lagi..
Ngapa gatai sangat tgk??

Why??

# Nk tenang cam baby tu.. takyah nk pk paper.. huhuuu

My mistake...

Ntah kenapa bodoh sangat nk tgk..
Sudahnya hati rasa terluka lagi..
Salah sendiri sbb ikut hati..
Menyerlahkan kebodohan sendiri..
Sekarang, pedih hati rasa macam nk mati..

Stress sbb keje..
Now stress sbb dia..
Bukan salah dia..
Sbb dia tak buat apa2..
Salah aku yg dah gile..

Sms Mr M, Mr S, Mr I and all others yg ai can think of..
Sume pakat call..
Dah gayut cam beruk pun..
Hati masih tak tenang..
Deymm!!!

Bodoh betul g tgk sapa suruh.. skrg hati dah tak tenteram.. G mam arr!!

# Ke'stress'an sy buat sy cam org giler.. Mind me.. Thank you

Curhat, 29 April 08

Last Sunday..

Ai jumpa derang ni kat KLCC. Sian derang lapar.. so ajak makan kat Chilli's. Tu muka kekenyangan arr tu...

Bila da kenyang, mulala dia buat perangai2 dia yg extreme tu. Ai ngan bro layankan je.. sukeatikola egyan oii...

See.. see.. Time ni derang baru blk amik telur itik.. so bau pun adala ala2 bau itik.. huhuu.. tersiksa aii tau.. :p

My first pic lepas balik dari KK. Ahakss.. muka tak nampak da sunburn nye.. so okla, I can publish my own pic. My bro n me. Nway, he's getting married soon. Wish him all the best!

Ai was supposed to attend Harta Intelek Negara Ekspo on Sunday sbb nk bawa blk brg2. So saja jela g sana. Then met bro Rizal , Eg n Beah. Lunch sekali kat Chilli's. Bro banje.. toche..toche.. ihikss.. (skrg ni sume lelaki2 yg i kenal is my bro ok.. doesn't matter elder bro or younger bro :p, penatla berscandal saja.. so skrg ni kita play safe, bersahabat.. )

Lps makan, Eg n Beah blk kontan, ai ngan bro lepak kat luar.. Lama giler dah tak jumpa. Last time jumpa rasanya time ai hangkut oni n avua g KLCC nk jumpa bro.. nk bincang sal keje. Yeke? rasanya yerla.. time tu bro still single n available lg. Sekalinya tak lama lepas tu, bro bertunang.. Jodoh.. orang kata kalau jodoh sehari pun bleh jadi.. kan??

Lepas sembang2, bro ada hal nk setel kat office n ai ada hal nk wat kat KL Convention Center. Mohd Iffat da tunggu kat sana. This cute guy is actually tgh ngorat2 nurul.. hehe. :p tp takpe since nurul tak dtg aritu, dia dok melayan ai je.. Sibbaik cute.. very I like.. ahaks..

Skrg ni tengah tense gak ni.. Rabu ni kene submit Midterm nye question paper. Masalahnya, my student's performance sgtla teruk. Tanya ngan lecturer2 lain, derang kata takyah pk sal studs yg penting they pay us. Masalahnya, ai tak suka if my students tak serius. They pay mahal2 tp tak paham apa2.. what for... I'm afraid my question tak selevel ngan derang.. too high nnt derang xleh nk jawab.. huhuu...

Esok da selasa..seyess da start rasa stress coz I've 2 hours class on wednesday plak. Deymm!!

Takde mende pun sebenarnya.. lama da tak update.. saja je update.. huhuu

Yo la...

Have a nice day!

Saturday dah...

Biasanya, kalau da jumaat je.. ai mesti stress cam orang giler. Orang giler pun tak sestress ai ni tau.. As usual td ada kelas, B4 class ada date ngan adik yg dtg jejauh dari Kuantan. Quality time kan? Walaupun sekejap.. doesn't matter..

Ok, pasal kelas. Td I gv my students pop quiz. Turn out ramai giler tak dtg, half je yg dtg so wat to do?? Bengang giler gakla.. so I simply bagi assignment, biar derang buat n faham what I thought. Nak wat camne, they are college's students.. byk main.. They don't bother about grades pun. Ai la yg tensen, its about my credibility. Arghh..

Td I called students yg agak lemah n hd heart2heart talk. Rasanya selama ni, ai tak pernahla garang ke aper. I try to be as frenly as possibly.. but trust me impression comes from looks. I do look sombong giler nak mampos kot. huhuu.. Nevermind..

SO bila da tanya2, then I know some of my students are from art background. N yet they are in Pharmacy line. Just imagine camne nk relatekan. They don't hv science basic. It's ok, I can help them with that. Pastu, they said.. sebenarnya ktorg tak paham bila Miss ajar in english. Term byk yg berubah. Can you please deliver in Bahasa?

Lor.. dah almost midsem baru nk bitau. Kekadang, my students ni buat ai rasa cam.. eii aku cekik2 la kang. Hohohoo...tp takperla.. I was instructed to teach in english.. rupa2nya students suka having lecture in bahasa.. takperla nnt kita cuba la. SO now, I know the problems perhaps I can overcome la.. Hopefully.. Arghh giler stress..

For the next 2 weeks, takkan ada kelas dah.. so kene buat make up class. Kene amik cuti time weekdays. Problem gak tuh.. haih.. pastu nk amik cuti lagi coz nk hantar nurul g interview.

Nway, talking about Nurul.. dia dah dishortlistedkan to get sponsorship by IJN to be nurse. I wish she'll get the sponsorship. It doesn't matter apa pun dia amik asalkan dia minat. Wish her all the best!!!

# Esok ada date ngan Bro @KLCC. Closing Harta Intelek Negara, I got to be there.. hampehss tul!! Deymm

Past..

Lately mimpi yg sama sering menghantui aku.. Letih.. Penat.. Serius dah tak larat..
Dikejar-kejar bayangan sendiri.. kalau dulu, waktu2 seperti ini membuatkan aku memikirkan perkara2 negative yg mgkn dihadapi seseorang. Tapi itu dulu, sewaktu rasa hati amat dekat, tika n kala hati berdetak kiranya terjd sesuatu terhadap 'my other half'.. Arghh bullshit tu semua..

When I was busy habiskan baca novel Ayat2 Cinta td, Mutalib ajak g lunch @5pm. Aku da alas perut tgh hari td, so kinda tak lapar sgt n I wasnt dgr sgt apa yg dia ckp. Sekalinya dia call ajak makan sekali. So layan jela. Makan kat food court bawah tu, order Carbonara. Lama tak makan, rindu plak rasanya.. Ermm.. tak brapa best sgt rasa dia sbb ai like it to be a bit spicy ngan addition of pepper tp okla... just nice..

Mulanya nk blk naik lrt je, then Mutalib offer nk hantar blk campus. So aper lg, tak penat nk jalan ngan high heel (maklum je, lama da simpan high heel.. cuma pakai time ada exhibition, conference n meeting). Ermm, dah kuar dari KLCC around 5.30pm, just imagine brapa teruk jammed yg akan ktorg hadapi.Sampai Shah Alam dlm kul 7.30 ye. All the way tu mmg tak hbs2 borak la. Ni sumer Mutalib nye pasal, dia ingatkan aku pasal my past..

My past SUCKSS!! I was the worst person ever.. tp dia bleh bantai gelak, n dia cakap.. ur story full of spices, ada kelakar, ada sedih, ada bodoh, ada bijak, ada benci, marah etc..etc..
As usual, bila citer pasal my past, kinda emotional sket. So, when it comes to personal n love life mcm tak terkeluar sgt citer2 tu. Tp bila ngan dia aku rasa, well I should be proud aku lalui semua tu. Tak semua org lalui apa yg aku lalui.. tak semua org ada peluang tuk kenal manusia2 yg baik dan beruk2 yg jahat. So, lucky me.. just that being so F stupid was my biggest mistakes tp what the heck..

I'm telling people that I'm 29 yet I'm not that old, n ppl said I look younger than my age. Heck, I'm still young just that, malas nk layan all those budak2 hingusan yg baru hbs blaja. If I said my real age, of coursela derang startla nk cucuk2... so kalo tua sangat, kira cam "ala, akak tu da tua sangatla". So terlepas dr masalah.. Tp td tetiba cam 'tersuka' ngan student Mutalib tu. Serius shit! Damn! Budak lagi tuh.. tp dia muda setahun.. what the heck kan? who cares pun :p

We get over things faster than we think
A week, a month, a year, I'll get over you
The sadness dies, the pain forgotten
And sometimes along with the better times
I must remember this
Life goes on without you
I must remember this
Now I'm alone
I must remember this
Life goes on without you
I must remember this
I'll love again
We get over things better than we think
We grieve, we move on, I'll get over you
The anger fades, indifference will rise
And something will fill up the empty space
(chorus)
It's just a matter, a matter of time
You fell out of love, but so will I
It's just a matter of
Must remember this
Life goes on without you
I must remember this
I'll love again

"Ko ni, terlalu lembut.. lembut hati.." Penilaian dari org yg tak kenal aku. Dari seorang yg menjadi pendengar setia aku. Harapan aku, agar dia tak 'terjatuh hati' kat aku plak nnt. Takut aku hilang kawan lagi. Cukupla sekali. Persahabatan tak boleh disulami rasa cinta, kalau tidak persahabatan akan binasa. Hey.. aku bercakap berdasarkan pengalaman ok! :)

Itu dulu, waktu aku masih berharap ada cinta sejati, tp sayang.. cinta sejati hanya dari Allah n untuk Allah sahaja. Aku hambanya yg lupa pada zat dan cintanya.. manusia terkutukla aku..
Allahumagfirlizunnubi waliwadidayya..

Benci betul bila jadi sentimental malam2 macam ni. Semalam baru lepas hangin ngan kawan, hari ni jd sentimental plak. Bersedia dah ke??

Detak hati rasa tak sedap.. rasa macam ada sesuatu yg kurang baik terjadi. Cuma aku tak pasti apa. Aku hanya mampu doakan agar tiada apa yg berlaku. Hopefully, itu hanya getar hati aku sahaja... mungkin permainan syaitan untuk melalaikan aku.. Damn u syaitan!!

Dahla, aku nk tdur..
Esok pagi tatkala bangun, kuharapkan takde lagi perasaan ni.. Benci!!

Aku da nak menempuh hidup baru.. patutnya dah tak rasa semua ni.. HAMPEHSS.. Ni sumer KLCC punya pasal.. siott tul!!

@KLCC gettin bored 2death

Kali ni rs cm BENGANGNYA!! Br hbs bc buku ayat2 cinta.Sskrg dah b6san gle.Nk g shopping duit xda.Any1 nk blanja?Hehe0

I'll be @KLCC

Hari ni kene ganti boss tuk attend exhibition amende ntah. Since one of his products won byk gold so they said ada potential to be marketed. Ntahla, malas nk tau lebih2 sal benda ni kang tambah pening kepala. So nk dijadikan citer terpaksalah ikut kata bos padahal keje ai berlambak lg nak disiapkan.. hampehss tull..

Tak suke nk g klcc ni.. serius tak suke.. bukan aper, last time g sini terserempak ngan exes.. terus takde mood.. hehee.. skrg ni mood tgh baik, better tak dirosakkan mood tu. Plus at the moment I'm running out of cashh (ni alasan sebenarnya..hohoo), camne nk shopping2 nnt? kater dah ada kat klcc kan.. huhuhuu.. benci..benci..

Kla, nk siap2 da..

Have a nice day everyone.. Wish me hv a nice day too k.. :D

Udah stress.. tlg jgn d+ lg donk..

Aku tak paham, n kali ni betul2 tak paham..
Bukan saja2 buat tak paham tp mmg serius shit aku tak paham..

As for me, kalau da ada gf what the heck nk g cari org lain tuk cerita masalah tu..
Dah tu aper guna gf tu? tunggul kayu? or sja je a person tuk diletakkan title gf tu?
Kalau taknak share masalah, taknak cerita problems.. baik takyah bergelar 'couple'
Aku tatau orang lain, but as for me.. kalau da nama bf, I wanted to know everything psal dia..
Share masalah.. so bila tetiba ada benda yg berbaur tak menyenangkan takdela nk timbul salah paham.. and akhirnya bergaduh2 bagai. Bosan tau tak..

Ingat seronok ke gaduh2 ni? Dah tua.. tolongla.. takde masa dah nk gaduh2.. takde maknanya.. Waktu2 skrg ni, salah paham tu.. ellehh sepele.. byk benda penting yg nk dipikirkan yg nk ditangani dari masalah2 salah paham ni.

Dulu yess.. zaman muda belia.. sket2 merajuk.. sket2 marah2.. sket2 takmo call.. sket2 takmo reply sms.. Arghh shitt... NOW? Hell with all those :p
But as Che'nelle ckp.. girls, we must be happy and any guys happen to be in our life, he must add the happiness bukan melenyapkan happiness tu.. OKAY?
So kalo rasa dgn merajuk, dgn marah2 boleh selesaikan masalah.. go ahead. I'm tired. I don't know how to pujuk orang.. serius.. I'm so fcuking serius.. Boleh tanya Mr SAA..

Bila semua orang sibuk nk kawin, sibuk jugak nak kawin.. so pergila kawin.. I mean nikah..

Salah kan, kalau pada dasarnya berhubungan dgn seseorang tp jauh didasar hati menyintai org lain? Salah berat..
So.. paham2 sendirila yer..

Letih..
I'm not ready..
That's it!

Curhat, April 22

Phone trial gik

Trial gne phone rizal.maklum aja,br tau so kinda xcited nk update frm phone br my dear rizal ni.hehe

Bosan

As promised,ai bw adik2 n cozin 2 times 7quare..Diorg 7ibuk main,ai ly

Stress.. ting tong lg ni..

Citer pasal KK mcm da malas nk citer, but pictures tell thousand words, so tgk jela gambar. OK!
As usual bila cuti-cuti, masuk keje balik je mesti byk giler keje nk kene cover. So masuk2 keje aritu sempat tensen yg teramat dasyatl, almaklum saja dah cuti mood pun mcm ala2 cuti lg, tp terus dapat keje gedebuk camtu.. mau tak stress giler akak.

Ke'stress'an tu sampai tahap jerit2 time mandula orang kata. Hehe.. sampai puan ros takut nk ikut g lunch tgk keadaan ai yg rada-rada kurang waras ni. Hohohoo... Bila da hari jumaat, makin stress dibuatnya. Rasa macam da tahap maximumla stress tu sbb bila da jumaat, maknanya sabtu ada class so itu juga bermakna malam tu kene study preparation tuk mengajar esoknya, bermakna juga kene bersengkang mata prepare slide, assignment n tutorial tuk derang.

Pagi jumaat tu dpt msg dr my student, minta kelas di'bring forward' ke session pagi. Bila pk2 ai bleh rehat petang tu, so ai agree jela. Mana nk tau I don't hv much time nak prepare everything in a nite. Maklum aja, dah kata ai ni last minute person.. so everything was to be done that nite. Sudahnya tdo jam 3.30am n bgn jam 5.30am. Siapkan lg lecture notes, gv final touch n done. Pastu terus bersiap tuk ngajar. Time tu ok lg. Rasanya sampai waktu ngajar I was still stable kot. Tp bila da masuk dekat 3 jam ngajar tanpa henti, dgn keadaan kekurangan tdur ni.. rasa macam dh nampak ramai sangat plak student dlm class tu. Time tu mmg da rasa ting tong giler.

My students majoritinya indian. 3 malays n 6/7 chinese. Ada yg mudah tangkap apa yg diajar n ada yg sangat lambat. Tp a good thing about indian, bila derang tak paham.. derang tak malu nk bertanya. N I'm glad that they hv that attitude. Tp my only 3 malays student ni, sangatla pemalu nk bertanya. The old mentality. Penat dah membebel (well, u know how bad if ai membebel kan??hehe), tp masuk tinga kanan kuar tinga kiri. Bila ai start buat quiz or tutorial, main2 saja. Tak paham tp tak pernah nk tanya. If I were fulltime lecturer, tak kisah kot sbb my problem mmg tu saja. Tp sbb I'm part timer n ada byk lg responsibility nk kene tanggung so ni jd mcm satu tekanan gak. (tp tak gak kurus2.. hahaa)

Semalam bg derang quiz, turn out diorang tak paham satu benda pun apa yg ai ajar last lesson. Rasa mcm, ai ni tak pandai mengajar ke?? Pastu bila buat post mortem ngan derang, rupanya my way of delivering things tak kene ngan level derang. Too fast n too simple. Forgot yg they are dip studs, so kene ngajar ala2 budak SPM. Kene all out, full info etc etc..

So smlm I did like what they want, all out. Rasanya 3.5 jam kejap je. Diorang pun da tension kot, tak sabar bila nk habis kelas. Ai lagila pala dah ting tong giler.. Bila habis class terus blk umah, tgk2 ramai plak org kat umah. They were discussion about the wedding. Lg 2 minggu. Mmg tak larat nk join, lantak la nk kata apa pun.. Sampai2 je, salam2 ngn tetamu n terus terbongkang tdo. Huhuuu..

Arini plan nk g Times Square, my coz dari Indo dtg sini so saja nk ajak dia jenjalan. Malam kng nk bw dia g Mines Wonderland plak. Walah.. makin rabak poket aku.. arini je kurang-kurang perlukn 5rat. Bila nk masuk duit ni?? Duit da takde ni.. huhuuu..

Okla, I'm going now..
Have a nice day every1

Stress

Saya sangat stress dgn keadaan wajah saya skrg ni!
Sunburned yg sangat teruk!
Patutnya tak payah pakai sunblock pun aritu..
It getting worst each day..
Mencik!!

Masuk2 keje, bos minta all the data..
I have to compile all data from my subordinates..
Masalahnya lain orang, lainla the arrangement of data..
Last2 saya pusing kepala..

Hari ni moody yg tak diketahui sebab musababnya..
Masih belum punya masa mo uplod pic di KK...
Lagi ga' mood aja..

I miss someone out there..
Tetiba je.. F8CK!!!

# Tu gambar kat KK aritu sket.. Later lepas hbs prepare lecture note ni, ai upload lenlain (kalo sempat siapla kan..)

Have a nice weekend guys..

Yesterday..

It was my first day at work after loooooonnnnngggggggggg holiday..
Thought of having another day off b4 report for work, but boss dah suh datang.
We had a visit from UiTM's Vice Chancellor, Dato' Seri Professor Dr. Ibrahim Abu Shah (ye ke nama dia camni?)
So nak taknak terpaksa gak masuk keje smlm. I was soooooo F tired. Tp what to do..
Muka was terribly burned like grilled fish or burned/overcooked fish or whateverla kan.. but I couldn't expose myself yesterday due to my scary-looking-face :p

The visit was like 15 mins but they hv prepared thing for 2 days.. What a waste kan?? Sibbaik baru ai baru blk so kinda blurr lg la.. hehe

I'm working on the report now so kinda pecah kepala with all the data yg berterabur tu.. fening..

Pic da upload but later baru I'll publish it here.. now, I'm very busy (but still can find time to blog..hehe)

Lecturer notes for this saturday plak.. duhh..

Have a nice day every1..

Just got back..

Arini turn out VC nk turun my lab. Yesterday bos da call suh masuk kerja hari ni.. no excuse. So nak taknak,arini kene keje gak.. penat ooo...

Later citer sal KK..
With picture of course.. hehe

Till then.. bubye...

Salam dari KK

Hye..

It's been three days in KK. I'm kinda enjoying it very much.. Day to day, activities packed.. Yesterday, went to Kundasang for Mt. Kinabalu park n Poring Hotspring with the canopy walk (it almost killing me.. hahaha). We spent the whole day today at 3 islands n spent sometimes at Pulau Gaya.. Merasa hidup as orang laut bah..

Apart of the sad n tense story, we had fun.. but I don't think 5 days is enough.. hehe.. I need more time.. huhuu..

Catch u guys later..

Tired.. 5 hours snorkling.. huhu.. I'm look like a grill prawn.. hehe..

Have a nice day everyone!!

OT

Ni, first step.. amik darah tuk study mende ntah..

Then, my task tuk kuarkan organ2 yg dikehendaki spt testis, kidney, lung, heart n spleen.

Actually, time ni ada ramai pelawat nk tgk the process.. Kinda nervous gak.. hahaa :p

My lab mates.. Yg lelaki tu my assistant. Very good person. Tp sorry, dah berpunya.. hehe

Last few days, ktorg operate Cik Ti after 6 months TA supplementation. Ni toxicity study, so on the said day semua pakat puasa sebab takut muntah belilah lepas operasi operate Cik Ti tersebut. Ada 20 ekor semuanya. Mula2 ambil darah dari vein utama, pastu keluarkan organ yg berkaitan tuk buat slide n for studyla. It is not my project so tak paham sangat the process but my task was to get all the desired organs n kawan sorang lg, weight the organ b4 kept in formalin.

Time keluarkan organ tu bagai, memang tak terpk pasal benda lain. Dalam pala otak, nk siapkan mende tu secepat mungkin je. Sebab, pening pala ngan bau ether and bau tikus n bau darah. Serius, jgn mimpi nk g makan ayam lepas operate Cik Ti tu, gerenti muntahbelilah dibuatnya. I've tried. Tobat, takmo dah.. Mau taknya terbayang2 je Cik Ti tu digoreng, mmg cam ayam goreng.. huhuuu... (mual2 perut.. erkk)

It's a nature of research. Kadang2 ada gak kawan yg fight for animal's right dok argue pasai guna animal to study toxicity. Ermm bukan takmo guna tissue culture the thing is, kita nk tgk the effect on organ itself bila consume naturally. Kalau bg dose kat tissue culture, 100% the drugs ada dlm media.. so kinda susahla.. ntahla tatau sangat pasal toxicity ni.. Tanya pada yg pakar.. Bukan bidang aii ok..

So project ni expected finish next month. Then, aku akan dapat satu tekanan dugaan tuk handle satu big project. Liza another project. Maknanya the two of us akan jd coordinator for 2 big projects. Dummm!!! jatuh cam nangka busuk.. I really need a break!!

Have a nice day everyone!!

I'm Awaaaaaaaaaayyy

So, I won't be around till tuesday..
Went for holiday lorr..

Nway, my boss yg tak bg cuti tu siap bagi duit poket lg tuk anak buah dia ni.. Hehe.. lumayan buat belanja.. :D

Tatau nk packing aper masuk beg ni.. macam malas je nk packing..
Dibe2 teringat malam nk ke Bandung.. huuhuu..

# Bilik cam tongkang pecah la skrg ni.. Mana mau tdo daa...

Aperkah??

Rasanya macam nk pengsan dah..
Penat yg teramat..
Sebab tu I need a loooooooooooooooooong holiday..
Mama pun da tegur..
"Kalau iya pun nk kumpul duit tuk kawin, ingat2la sket..badan tu bukan kuat mana. Kang sakit, takde guna da duit2 tu sumer"
Hohohoo.. betul ke tuk kawin?? Cam tak caya je..
Yer ke nk kawin..
Aper2lah..
Tgk jela nnt, ada jodoh kawinla.. takde jodoh.. APERKAH??
hehee..

Nak siapkan assignment tuk student b4 aku bg 2 weeks off. Aku g holiday derang pun cuti sama.. so kenela tinggalkan assignment kat derang. Nak sambung blk..

Nite

Hidup

Hidup memang umpama roda..

Td bercerita dgn teman lama, tanpa disedari mengalir airmata. Cerita tentang topic yang sama, perihal yg sama. Kalau boleh aku mengeluarkan kata2 kesat, memang rasanya akan ku caruti orang2 yang terlibat. Mujur saja, aku berdekatan dgn kedua ibubapaku.

Dulu, aku yang mengalaminya. Sekarang temanku, manakala aku ditempat kawan2 yg serba salah dahulunya. Kadang2 ada perkara dalam hidup yg tak mampu kita selesaikan sendiri, ada perkara yg kita tak mampu masuk campur, ada perkara yg kita tak patut masuk campur. Biarkan mereka selesaikan dgn cara mereka sendiri. Tapi, sewaktu aku hampir gila kerna cinta.. tak pernah ku fikirkan rasional kawan2 tidak mengkhabarkan berita buruk terlebih dahulu, walaupun mereka sedar dan mengetahui apa yg berlaku. Aku menyalahkan sepenuhkan kawan2 tersebut yg bagi ku terlibat sama dalam mengkhianati perhubungan kami sebagai kawan kononnya.

Tp sejak kebelakangan ini, aku hidup di dalam keadaan serba salah. Perlukah aku interfere dlm hubungan mereka atau aku hanya perlu mendiamkan diri. Kata Mama, jgn libatkan diri dalam masalah. Tp sanggupkah aku lihat kawan sendiri dikhianati, ditipu hidup, diperlekehkan?? Bagi aku, kehidupan aku skrg adalah lebih bermakna tanpa kehadiran org2 yg hanya mengambil kesempatan tanpa memikirkan hati dan perasaan. Kata Mama lg, yg sudah jadikan iktibar, jangan diulang kesilapan yg sama. Mampukan sahabatku itu menerima tekanan yg maha dasyat ini? mampukah aku melihat sahabat sendiri terluka walau hakikatnya memang itu yg akan berlaku. Cepat atau lambat, iya tetap akan terjadi..

Namun sahabat,
Hanya satu..
Ini adalah hikmah yg paling bermakna sekiranya perhubungan itu diputuskan. Tiada nyawa yg akan menyokong kiranya hati menginginkan perhubungan diteruskan. Hanya akan menambah duka di hati. Lupakan sahaja semuanya dan mulakan langkah baru demi mencapai kebahagiaan hidup baru.

Maafkan aku sahabat,
Andai tak dapat ku khabarkan kepadamu..
Kerna perihal perhubungan ada keputusan dua hati..
Aku tak berhak mengadili kerna kalian lebih mengetahui..
Tapi satu pintaku, setiap yg berlaku ada hikmahnya..
Tabah dan hadapi semua ini dengan hati yang terbuka..


Kata kawan menyampaikan berita..
"Kau dikatakan macam sundal, bitch, playgirl malah direndahkan maruah kau"
Siapa yg kenal aku? Kenal aku sedalamnya? Hanya "mereka". Siapa yg akan bersuara? Yg dikenali oleh temanku yg satu ini. Tak perlu aku namakan. Cukup ku kirimkan ucapan jutaan terima kasih. Masih tidak puas menghukum aku?? Masih byk dendam nestapa tersisa buatku?? :)) Tak perlu baling batu sembunyi tangan, aku sedar siapa aku.. Tak perlu cakap2 belakang.. aku tahu mana tahapku.. Tak perlu dihumbankan segala penghinaan.. aku sudah ckup merasa terhina.. mengenalimu, mempercayaimu, menyayangimu adalah penghinaan maha dasyat dalam hidup ini. Jadi kata2mu itu semua bukanla apa2 bagiku. Terlalu byk yg aku terima, terlalu banyak yg aku dengar.. tidak memberi kesan walau sebesar zarah pun dalam diri ini.

Sekarang kita hidup dengan kehidupan masing2. Belum pernah aku mengganggu kehidupanmu. Tidak pernah aku tanyakan perihal kehidupanmu, kisah cintamu bila mana aku merasakan itu semua hanyalah sampah yg akan mengotorkan minda dan hatiku. Kata mereka, GO TO HELL with them.

Walau sehina manapun seseorang itu, masih ada tempat disisi Allah sekiranya mereka bertaubat. Siapa kau untuk menghakimi aku?? Terlalu hinakah aku hingga kau lemparkan tuduhan2 seperti itu? Siapa kau untuk menghina aku?? Get a life ok!

I've mom to share my problems with..
N to be honest I want all of 'mereka' to get the hell out of my life. DOn't mention their names, anything related to them.

Now, you can simply GET LOST..
N to those who simply breaks girl's heart out there... FUCK YOU

# Believe in Karma, WHAT YOU GIVE, YOU GET BACK!

A very long day..

I'm working on saturday.. Yeay... it's been a while.. but today is the worst day ever.. huhuu..
Early in d morning, drop by the UiTM to settle some of unsettled business left yesterday. Then, got the notes and lecturer notes for evening class ready.

Went to Puan Sri's house coz I've got some things to do with the officer at the college and I know none of them. So, I was in d need of her help. Reached the college around 2, start class @2.30pm and end it @4pm. Covered 4 chapters in 2 hours time. huhuu..

After class then I realize I didnt take my lunch.. Resulting headache till now.. duhh..

It's been a while I'm not teaching so I kinda having a problem in delivering lecture. Perhaps I can improve next time.

Fening..

Have a nice weekend..

Expected to be unexpected...

OK..
I'm still pissed off coz I haven't got approval for 5 days break.. Hell ya, I'm pissed off..
But later.. later..

******************

One side is my friend, the other side also my friend. Both are my friend. But to let my own fren hurts my other friend is just not right. But yet, I've no right to interfere in their problem. Gosh, how
I wish I can help but nothing I can do. I'm really in the situation where, I'm afraid things will get worst.

Anyway, everyone might get a chance to feel betrayed, to be hurt, to be broken hearted..
but, how I wish that my friends would never come across such things. Especially when I know how bad it will be.. I've been there.. It was terrible and painful and awful.. Never wish of it. I almost lost my mind back then, luckily I got bunch of great friends and a wonderful parents. Thanks to them!

So please.. please.. please.. my dear friends..
If you are bisexual, do tell your girlfriends or boyfriends.
I don;t know how about others, but I can't tolerate gay or lesbo..I'm sorry.. no offense k
If say, my other half betray me (who knows kan??but u better b loyal!).. I won't mind much if I was beaten by a girl coz its human nature afterall, guys always looking for a better one. But, if he cheated over a guy..it is really unforgiven. FULLSTOP!!

Euwww....

***********************

Lagi 5 hari je tuk buat keputusan. Samada nk lari terus atau nk ckp betul2. If betul2 lari without proper notice mau tunggang terbalik research team aku by the time blk dari cuti nanti. Mau kene tengking, kene herdik ngan big boss yg manjang je PMS tu. (I'll decide on tuesday, nk g ke tak.. huhuuu)

Td Miss Thallie came over. Ajak aku bincang sal project cosmetic. Dia nk blk Surabaya this May. Dia ajak aku. huhuuu... aku ckp, u tell boss, if he say ok then I'll definitely go. Bila dia bitau, bos kata, NO..NO..NO.. FULLSTOP!

Dia memang dengki ngan aku. Dia takleh cuti tu masalah diala. Aku nye duit habis tuk bercuti je, tu masalah akula..tensen giler aku dibuatnya. Tapi mmg dah rasa cam nk buat pedajal je skrg ni. Geram.. geram..

Camne nk g bali nnti ni.. Benci betul, sumer plan tunggang langgang.. Deymmm!!

::BENGANG MODE::

DISCLAIMER: Weh, suka atila grammer ke language aku berterabur..NI bukan kamus dewan. Aku tulis ikut suka ati akula..

Pagi yg terang...

Hari ni mcm mls nk g keje..
But Mom da masakkan mee goreng tuk anaknya breakfast b4 keje..
Rasa mcm nk buat dajal arini pun ada gak..
Malas nk masuk keje..
Biar tonggang langgang staff2 aku..
Padan muka..
Sapa suh tak luluskan cuti..
WTF!!!!!!!!!!

Pagi terang pun hati aku gelap lg ni..
HUhuuuu

Malas

Ada benda nk ditulis..
Tp malas..
Ngantuk..
N malas..
Tp yg pasti, malas adalah sebab utama..
N bengang adalah antara sebab2nya..
Arghh laterla..

# Cuti tak lepas.. Rasa cam nk terjun je dr tgkt soploh tu ke tgkt 7 td.. Damnnn!!!
( Tgkla, aku cuti sendri.. baru tau rasa.. cilakak tul! )

Special Dedication 2 EG..

SPECIAL DEDICATION TO NOR IZYAN HASSAN
Happy Birthday Dear..
Since I'm not around so there will be no pressy.. but no worries..
I'll have these bunch of cakes for you..
To menyemarakkan lagi lemak2 di badan anda..
Don't forget to get in touch when u back to KL..
I'll hv a birthday treat special for you. hehe.. (aku lupa umur ko brapa ehh?? 27/28?? ahakss)

Nice one kan?? Tp takut tak cukup plak.. so aku bg yg ceklat plak..
Ni amik ko.. hehhe

Tak cukup gak.. ni ada lagi...

N the last one.. ada lg satu tp malas nk upload.. hehe.. lets get the real one soon.. :D

Sorry ekk, I tdo awal.. ada meeting esok.. So, wish pun terawal.. hehe..
Take care..

April Fool.. ada ke lagi?? hehe