Merdeka ??

Apsal ntah, tak rasa cam merdeka pun arini.. Biasanya area my house ni penuh ngan all the lampu lip-lap, hanging bendera n bunyi fireworks.. but today.. senyap sunyi, gelap gelita.. Perhaps sbb skrg ppl dont really bother pasal merdeka bila mana jiwa n diri tak rasa merdeka mana.. kan? kan?
As for me, since 4 years ago.. my merdeka day always celebrated in my own way.. of last 3 years, tears came out for a stupid reason but today at the 4th year, still had tears in my eyes.. but for totally different reason!

My mom is sick, so I hope everyone can pray for My Mom's wellness.. At the moment, she can neither walk nor talk, can't really eat or else she will throw it out. She getting worst since gotten back from Jakarta. I'm kinda worried but as long I'm at home with her.. I think it should be okay for me.. Been to clinic n hospital couple of times.. yet there's no improvement.. Dr said, it was just a symptom of tireness.. What the??

It was supposed to be a family dinner tonight and its my turn for the treat but Mom couldnt walk, not even stand.. so I bought KFC (as Pizza Hut was crowded with ppl) bcoz my lil bro wanna eat Zinger. Brought it back n have dinner in my parent's room. The dinner wasn't that nice as seeing my own mom lying on the bed helplessly.

Ramadhan is coming n yet I couldn't imagine having Ramadhan with Mom in such condition.

Please Pray for My Mom's wellness.. Thank You..
.

Jakarta re-cap..

Malas nk citer panjang2.. lets the pictures tell the story.. hehe

My aunty n her grandchild, Nayla..

Cozins..

B4 naik Halilintar.. cam naik roller coaster je..

Yg aku tak brani naik.. TORNADO.. huhu.. serem..

Di rumah miring yg menyebabkan ktorg pun jd miring.. huuuuhuu

Mom tercinta..

Next to me is my cozin who is currently working in Thailand. Last time he was in Vietnam n purposely get back to see his cozin.. isn't it cute?? :p

The bro, Bang Depp

Di entrancenya DUFAN (aka. DUnia FANtasi)

Lagi antri nunggu kora-kora.. ala cam sampan terbang tu.. sempat gakla terbang gak jantung ku.. hehee

When she really enjoying her holiday...

I'm at Jakarta @ the moment..
Just got back from Dufan, Anchol. Picture to be uploaded later..
Hmm.. really had a great time here.. at least no to think about other think.. really glad about it.. huhuuu..

My flight was retime early this tuesday, so I called the person in charge to change the time. i don't want to have early morning flight. prefer the evening one, or at least night.. but what to do.. so just change to the evening flight.. should be okay I guess.. hehe..

Erm.. not a really good vacation but at least i really enjoy it. I didn't buy anything.. there's lot of unexpected things happened.. huhuu.. now my finance is in the bad shape.. owh.. that is really bad.. really2 bad.. waa...

That's it for now.. but my next target is Jogja.. no matter what.. b4 getting married.. (kapan sih mo meritnya? sampai pake2 due segala.. hahaaa)

Have a nice day everyone..

When her life isn't that well.. n her boss is suckss...

It's been a while no updates.. huhuu..
Been busy lately..
Still there's lot to do n yet hv no time to do it..
Need to submit the final exam question by tomorow n I haven't finish yet..
Hv to submit the midterm result but I need to recheck some question again..
Need to trace back the measurement of the suckssboss.
Its like millions of reading... crazy old senile guy.. Damn him!!.. huh!!
I wanna break. I just ran away.. I don't care..
Once I get back, I'll again concentrate on my fucking project..
Now I'm regretting this.. damn!

When the BadBoy celebrating his birthday...

Bassl celebrating his birthday today... August 16, Happy Birthday BadBoy!!
He went to our house last nite to have tea n stay for almost 3 hours. Gosh.. I was so tired but we need to entertain guest. huhuu.. He went back around 3 am. Date in the middle of the night. Hohohoo...

No birthday party coz the fiancee is not around.. Pity you BadBoy!!

My colleague and I went to hv dinner at Summer Steamboat last nite. Nice dinner though, it has been a while didnt hv such gathering..

I was pretty busy for the past 2 weeks and for the next 2 weeks. Just submitted final exam result of Mahsa Students n now I've to start marking the midterm of the MSU students. 2 of my students failed the Biostat paper. I'm sad indeed. Is it my fault that these students failed?

Just now, I went to MSU to get the midterm paper. So I need to spend this whole weekend to mark their paper. The hv to prepare final question set, lecture notes n so many things.. Gosh!!!
I've to make sure I finish everything in this week. as I'm off to Jakarta again.. huhuuu...

Now, please excuse me.. There's a lot of things to do.. Arghh.. another dinner date with Bassl the BadBoy!!

Have a nice weekend everyone!!

When she says YES and her heart says NO

He's goin to Denmark tomorow morning with a morning flight of course. I won't be sending him to airport. He said no.. & I dont want too..

Went out last nite, he was late n I get mad. He asked me what would I want as for his punishment..being a 'bad' girl, I was jokingly said a beautiful pair of shoes and a nice handbag. He drove to Jusco n he bought me 2 pair of shoes.. hehe.. I said, it must be from Denmark.. He smile n said, wait for another 2 weeks.. hahaa.. well done for pretending as I'm enjoying his company while actually I don't really enjoy it..

Perhaps, the fact that I can get lotz of stuffs is more likely to be me.. Bad girl.. Sorry ..

Masters project is getting harder n even difficult n i started to hate it.. started to feel not like it.. n now I'm regretting myself doing this stupid decision.. hell with masters hell with study.. hell with all this research!! I need a break.. a long good break.. I'm going out of country for a week.. just to find my innerself.. hehee.. :p (mind me, I'm kinda losing my mind now!!)

When there is no shine in her heart...

Last week went not very well. So many things happened and I don't hv time to give a damn about it. There was the International Carnival at Sunway College and I attended it with few friends as my housemate insisted to go. I met Bassl after 2 weeks not seing him. We were very busy lately..

He's putting on weight n so do me.. hehe.. being very busy doesnt mean u'll get slimmer.. Last time, when I first move into this kondo.. I always think about how am I going to eat coz I'm very lazy. I don't like to cook but now, almost everynight everyone inviting me to have dinner at their house.. hehe.. Now I get use to Iranian food. My housemate is a good cook.

Spent time together for the whole night. He always by our side.. Not to leave even in a single minute.. hehee.. teasing each other is a must for both me n him. Once got back, we asked to he bus driver to be dropped at Hakeem Restaurant n we (me n some Iranian friends) stay there until 2. Then back to Kondo. Bassl requested 'chi' or tea so I prepared some n we sit n talk at the part until 4am. I was really dizzy n sleepy but he cannot stop himself from talking...

Golnaz came n join us. Now he said, we can only hv time after midnite but I dont think I can stand.. once in a while is ok.. but not everyday..

Erm.. I'm sleepy.. Need to sleep... later I sambung..

Decision that has to be made....

Walau betapa sukarnya buat keputusan..
Harus digagahi jua agar tak menyesal kemudian hari..
Hidup ini tak mudah.. at least for me..

Dah few days tak blk rumah..
Just stay kat kondo though during weekend..
Papa dah start risau..
Byk benda nk buat, byk hal yg difikirkan..
Now, I've decided to do it..

I'm gonna be moneyless, won't hv money to shop..
But it's okay as long as I don't hv to listen ppl scream, shout and mad at me as if I'm the 'cullee buttach'..
Papa agreed even he advised me to do this..

Some ppl knew it, some advised me to rethink about it..
Now, I've made my mind..
Let me do it..
Terhutang budi bukan perkara yg baik.. In fact.. sangat tak baik..
So I dah taknak terhutang budi lagi dah..
Thanks alot..

Let me hv my own way..
N YOU..
Just GHT!!!

When Cici is under stress...

Gadget kah?? Habis 600 just for this computer thingy.. huhuu, 8GB thumbdrive tu just RM80. For me da cheap da tu.. Pastu 160GB ext. hd, I bought for 190. 2GB td is for 25 (yea, this one is e

I've got a good bargain on 2GB XD card.. just RM105.. For my Olympus Digicam (tu card lama eh)

Just now, went to Jusco Bukit Raja n bought all of this.. It's sale.. I can't stop myself from try n buy.. huhuu.. Now, I don't have money.. huhuuu

Nak beli a great Voir pair of shoes, tp takde saiz so I took this Primavera.. just RM32,90 ok.. what a great price.. originally 109,90. Idakla keje mak nk beli mahal2 camtu kan.. pastu lepas brapa byk sale.. I bought this one.. merasa gak pakai kasut mahal walaupun belinya takle mahal sangat.. ekekeke...

Now, I hve to put some in my locker, the rest at the shoes rack.. The one in the locker has been transferred to the shoes rack.. huhuu.. siann...

Now, I'm don't hv money.. huhuu..
Spent RM230 for the shoes, RM109 for jeans and blouse and now I don't have money left.. sedeyy... Tp puas hati sbb dah shopping.. My roommate kata, I'm crazy.. Yea.. I am..

I was so stress so shopping help me relieve... bestnya... more money.. please come... hahahaa

Owh, kene transfer insurance money kat uncle plak.. some more.. duit lagi.. aduh!!

So, see.. how bad n crazy I can be if I get stressed all over.. Niat td nk g Jusco just to get towel.. tp towel tak terbeli.. ai CUMA beli LIMA pasang kasut..
I'm really crazy.. huhuuu

Now, I feel ok.. tak stress dah.. yeay..
Nak tdo dah..
Nite

1.50am

Things that make me laugh... while I'm stress...

Urrmm.. kirain mau nulis pake english tdnya taunya lupa... gue udah janjian ma abangku yg ganteng, agar dia bisa baca.. agar dia bisa ketawa juga membaca lelucon2 dari adeknya yg 'jelita kaleeee' ini. Hehee... nikmati ya bang.. tau aja kalau di tgh laut itu ga' ada hiburan.. hehee..

Tdnya sih, lagi nge-beresin email2 lama2 yg mau di transfer the folder2 tertentu biar lebih kemas, biar lebih teratur inboxnya.. ya maklum aja..email udah tua.. lain deh mah orang yg baru punya email.. :p (pokoknya siapa yg nge-jahilin gue harus nerima balasannya :D )

Ada 2 email yg bkin gue penasaran aja membacanya soalnya dari org yg ga' pernah walau sedikit pun gue ini ya bisa bikin org ga' karuan.. aduh pusing mikir translationnya dlm bahasa indo.. ntar aja dehh.. (bang, dah dulu.. nnt ci ceritain lain..soalnya pusing mau nyari words nya)

Ok, well, my cozin who currently working offshore wanted me to email him everyday as he's got nothing to do so he wants me to tell him everything about me so that he can read. Hard to send email everyday as I don't hv time to do so many things.. ;)

Lately I'm in a deep stress. Really deep.. everysingle part of me are screaming to be out of this stress.. yet I'm still figuring it out on how to bring myself out of this misery. When I was sorting/managing my email, I saw unfamiliar email though the name of the sender is very familiar.. I open it n I read it.. well.. it was sad though if I read it back then.. but today when I reread it, it is soooooo fu**ing funny.. hahahaa... I love you dear... very dearly.. but still I dissapointed with you n I can't bare to dissapoint again.. hehee..

One thing.. when u love some1, don't change ur habit just bcoz of your love ones but change your habit bcoz ur own will.. otherwise, you'll regret.. Things will never be better if we change ourselves bcoz of others... coz we never know what gonna happen in the future..

For those yg pernah kene tengking, kene herdik by me.. I'm sorry.. especially for those yg pernah having "special relationship" with me.. ahakss.. If you can't earn respect from me as ur gf, better off just walk away... I'm not good..

Tp email td terlalu lucu untuk dipertontonkan disini.. But I miss old time.. ahahahaa

Who were there at my worst days back then.....

I met these two guys yesterday. They came to see me.. Thank you.. Thank you.. At least not all my friends ignoring my wellbeing :p. It was on Hatta's, last nite dinner. Thank you a lot again. Each time, I wanna hv my money out, there always some1 who willing to pay.. ahakss..

Sitting together for hours reminds me the old days when we were working in the same lab. Hatta is still the same old person. None of him change a bit. Still the same with his high ambition and all. Hehee..

Last 2 nites,had chat with Mike. Talking about a friend's wedding they are about to attend. Ask me if I would like to join. I declined their offer as I was sulking over not being invited (yea.. being childish.. whatever). He said, he didn't get the invitation either but the other friend who is now an oilngasfella insist to go.. Well, he's getting rich n rich each day yehh.. :p
Said they were planning to go on Friday evening.

All I can say to the Newly wed couple, CONGRATS!!
Mike sms'ed me yesterday. He didnt go as he doesnt get the card. What a reasonable excuse ehh..
Owh, i dont wanna talk about it actually.. but something that mike's doing recently catch my interest.. hehe..
Writing a script of his own life.. Don't you think it is interesting? I do find it really interesting as you can change it along the way. As if, we are creating our own fate. Ermm.. for time being, dont hv time to write a script for my own film, where I'll be the main cast. Hohohooo..

I told him once "I don't hv time for commitment and I kinda worry coz I'm getting old. In few months time, I'll b getting 27."
He replied "No worries,the time will come when you hv time for commitment but the commitment is no longer there for you."
Yea, understood.. Arghh now I realized how old I am..

I almost cried yesterday. I almost throw away the laptop and yell at my cozin. I had enough of his screams n shouts over me. I was out of my control. But I manage to control my anger. But turns out, it affected me. I feel tears are all over.. I know its hard to control the anger but hell I manage to control it. But the price I've to pay, being a tearful person. Doesn't matter. Just be patience for another 7 months.. Then get the hell out of the place..

Owh can't wait!!!