Showing posts with label Love. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Love. Show all posts

Thursday, January 21, 2010

Life is so unexpected 6

B4 anything.. plz wish me luck ok.. Got 2nd interview with pharmaceutical company. & I really hope I can get the job. Pray for me ppl..hehee

Actually lotz of thing nk story mory with u guys but malas nk naip neh.
Tapi this morning Mama ask me to help with anak terbiar my aunty tuh.. the father taknak responsible unless the mother get back together with him. The mother doesn't want reconcile, takut kene dera lagi.

I mean like, what kind of father would rather see his own blood uneducated bcome illiterate?? COme on, you are not a kid la.. use some brain. Btw, his reason is that the kid is not Chaniago's (minang style of hereditary is passed by mother side). So, since the father is Chaniago's and the mother is Sikumbang? (not sure bout this).. he said the kids is not belong to his clan. WTF??

Tolongla hey big guy out there.. korang nk bercerai berai.. go ahead just jgn babitkan anak camni.
Even anjing pun sayangkan anak.. (ni ayat the wife). Pehtu the husband calling my Dad suh ajar aunty nye adik beradik (this aunty is mom's cozin). Alasan, marah sbb the wife calling him bapak anjing. The wife ckp dia cuma ckp yg bold statement tu je. Org tua ni.. kalo da buat keputusan tak gune akal.. mmg bodoh!!

Seyes, I cam tak caya.. dlu this couple is the most romantic couple la. Even, mama pun selalu jeles ngan derang. Tak sangka kan?? Mcm tak percaya pun ada..

Futnot: Doa' si dia.. 'InsyaAllah, semoga jodoh kita panjang. Amin.' I hanya mampu terkedu.. Am I ready?? Really??

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

Will you be my girl??

I spent the whole day at Putrajaya. Trying to get another 6 months VISA for granny. Thank God I knew Z from the last visit. So this time around he helped me a lot. Actually, I didn't bother to tell him I'm at the office but then when the application get some problem, I still need his help. One sms, and he came as a knight in shining armor.. hahaa..

He came to the counter, get all the application forms and all the documents, sent it directly to the boss. And gentlemanly asking Mom, granny and me for lunch. Mom being so sporting suggested he bring me for lunch.. hehe.. Thank you Mama..

We had lunch at Taman Warisan and he bought roti john for bringing home. Erm.. amik hati katanya.. Somehow, we had great time together. Lol..

When I reach home, a call from Z..
"Will you be my girl?"
Erkk.. I'm speechless. Honestly, We get to know each other less than a month. I'm not ready for this yet. Plus tell you what, I'm too fakin ol for this lovey dovey thingy ok!!.. hahaha

I'm blushing.. Goshh...

Futnot: Am I ready for another love??

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

He's just not into you..

I just closed Yazi's blog tab!
Trust me, I wrote the title first b4 I even thinkin to check on her blog.
Deymnn!!! I'm a lil bit late hon..
hehehe.. whateverla, kinda we hv the same thing in mind..
If only.. If only..
Ahakss... (btw, I wonder who the hell is your new 'Abu Hurairah'?) hahaa

Well.. I'm still in the denial state. yeay.. pity me..
A hell a lot of courage needed..
Yet, I'm still there.. holding the memories..
Shit!!

He's just not into you..
Can't u understand that??
This evening after a hell of work done..
After few days not be able to get ol due to business...
After few days not be able to check my email..
I received something..
I got something..
And bushhhhh...
I hurt myself without even realizing it..
Damn it.. why is it hard for me to understand???
He's just not into you!!!

Hans Isaac, can't you be more available for me???
hahahaa...

A lot of thing to share yet I'm really not in the mood..
Maybe later.. when I can feel the excitement!!
Btw, I'm working on the rat still..
So I'm so fucking stink..


Hola... Me ames..
Let me hold on it..
Need no worries..
As it only takes me one hour to love you..
Yet it takes me forever to get over you..
May you in the best condition of yours...

Monday, March 16, 2009

Badan ketul-ketul and six pack..

Chris Evan - What a hot stuff..

Chad Murray - One Tree Hill.. Sbb dia gak aku layan citer tu.. huuuhuu..

Ni tuk cuci mata yer.. muaahahhaa...

Papa Paul Walker.. huhuu.. hotzzz..

Aku mmg suka kat Dr Chase ni since the first time aku tgk dia kat House. Regret la dia called off the wedding the Jen Marrison tu. Padahal da sama2 cantik.. Aii lurvee..


Hari ni aku demam. Demam sebab tgh malam td aku tulis entry cakap aku benci ngan boss. Memang nyampah sbb dia suka bagi aku keje banyak2. Keje dia. Patutnya nnt kalo project PhD dia da siap.. takyah letak nama dia, tampal nama aku. Senang2 aku da dapat PhD sbb lebih 50% keje dia dulu aku buat. Sebab dia takmo nampak cam aku buat so dia upah orang2 baru ulang balik sumer keje aku. Bijak tak? Cerdik tak? Ulang balik keje tu sampai da 4-5 kali kot. Ermm lantak la..

Tapi sebab aku tensen, sebab aku stress, badan2 aku sakit2 sebab terpaksa duduk sebilik ngan Cik Ti the whole day, nak ditakdirkan aku demam. Sakit kepala macam nak pecah kepala. Bukan.. bukan macam migrain yg aku selalu kene tu. Sakit kepala ni macam bila aku baring je rasa macam kepala aku tu da nak pecah. Sakit giler. Dah 2 hari. Ubat biasa aku makan da takde, td suh my bro g cari ubat tu. Tapi da takde. Aku da telan panadol actifast 4 biji since pagi still tak hilang lg sakit kepala. Lepas makan panadol td, aku bantai tdo berselubung ngan selimut tebal, tutup kipas bagi badan berpeluh so fever aku blh pecah. So, lbh kurang kul 1 aku bangun ngan badan basah lencun. Maknanya fever da pecah. Tinggal sakit kepala and sakit perut je. Errkk aku tak citer aku sakit perut ehh. Sakit perut sbb hari 1st bulan mengambang. Dah lama aku tak layan sakit owang ppuan ni. Tp sbb aku demam kot, dia datang in package.

Sebab da terlalu lama tdo, aku tak larat nk tdo lagi. Aku dok tgk tv. Tak bley nk layan. So aku browse net. Aku dok layan video clip Amr Diab dari tgh hari td. Sampai la ni. Pastu browse gambar2 Dr Chase (House). Ermm tiba2 aku rasa mcm berminat ngan org badan berketul2 ni. Ni sume penangan Samuel Rizal semalam. Arghh.. kene rajin g gym pasni. Bukan nk work outla.. korang ingat aku rajin nk work out.. owh puhliss.. aku nk cari candidate yg berbadan chantekk..
p/s: yang, u kene rajin g gym blk.. bagi badan ketul2 sket, ada six pack. Huhuuu.. mesti sexy u.. aii like..

Ingat2 balik, aku tak pernah couple ngan org yg badan berketul. Yg ada six pack jauh sekali. Tp yg ada 2 pack kat kat depan tu adala. 1 tuk bahagian atas, 1 lagi tu perut yg menonjol kedepan. Ngalahkan ppuan ngandung pun ada. Tp tu dulu.. time sayang, so tak kisahla kan..:p maybe sbb tu gak skrg aku tertarik ngan manusia2 yg badan berketul2.. (aku letak tangan kat dahi... sah masih deman lagi.. so maafkan kata2 mengarut aku ni k)

Since aku cuti arini, so aku tatau nk wat aper. Mama takut aku kene denggi so td Mama masak sup ketam. Kalo org suspect denggi, adalah baik kalo dimasakkan sup ketam. So minum air dia byk2 k. So, nk dijadikan citer ketam tu tak fresh da.. so skrg aku menanggung akibatnya. Aku allergy seafood especially yg tak fresh. Dahla demam baru nk kebah, kepala macam nak meletup, perut ni memulas tak habis2 dapat plak lagi satu gatal2 kat muka n belakang badan aku. So satu combination yg sangat sempurna.

Ok, berbalik kepala badan ketak ngan six pack. Dah kata berkenan ngan org berbadan ketak wif six pack. Aku pun gatal contact kawan aku yg rajin ke gym. Citer ngan dia kegilaan aku. Tiba2 dia ckp, 'hati2 sket yg org yg badan2 ketak2 ni yang. Nampak cam lelaki tulen tp tak semestinya derang suka kat ppuan.'

Cisss.. merosakkan mood aku sungguh. So for those yg rasa badan dia ketak2 wif six pack.. jom kita kuar.. hahhaa.. nk gak rasa kuar ngan org yg badan ketak2 ni. Ada rasa bangga ke eh?? maklumla jalan ngan org yg berbadan sasa. Rasa selamat kah??

Dulu aku pk, kalo jalan ngan orang hensem mesti rasa bangga giler. So bla aku jalan ngan org2 hensem ni mula2 je cam best. Pastu trus rasa tak best sbb org dok tgk je kan. Bukan tgk aku.. tgk org sblh aku. Ciss.. tak beshh.. so biarla jalan ngan org yg berwajah bese2 je. rasa secure. Tp still aku nk rasa jalan ngan org badan sasa n ketak2 ni.

# Sebenarnya aku jeles giler ngan S. Amani peluk2 si Samuel Rizal dalam movie SAYANG tu. Cisss.. sangat menggugat keimanan gue..

p/s: Yang, cepatla build ur body tu.. hahaa... aii takmo 1 pack yg ngalahkan pregnant lady tu. okies.. huhuu

** Maafkan penulis atas kegilaan entry kali ni. Maklumla tgh tak brapa sihat. BUkan badan je.. ngan kepala2 hotak sekali weng.. Sowwy..

Saturday, October 20, 2007

An update

Salam Aidilfitri..

My brother.. Tgk.. betapa keciknya aku.. huhu..

See again, Im the shortest among my sisters..

Too many stories, too little time, too much to tell, to lazy to type.. and the moral of the story.. write when u feel free to.. hehe..

Raya was really tiring for me n I can't imagine how the open house will be plus the open house will be gather with kenduri for mom n dad's kenduri kesyukuran. The date hasn't been chosen yet but for sure not next week.. The parents will be attending Kursus Haji Perdana for the last time before they fly to Mecca.

No more cerita pasal raya. Just too many things n everything tangled in my mind.. susah nk huraikan satu2 (in fact I'm really malas... :p)

Had a girl day out with Yazi yesterday. It's been a while tak pernah hv leasure time for myself.. so smlm kinda having a good time la.. Spending all money left for me to survive (huhuu) but its worth it.. Me just likey.. (plus, I got my 500 bonus including half month gaji already..) so mak da kaya blk.. haha. :p

OK.. done with the GREAT part..

The notsogreat part plak..

Well, when 2 girls meet.. the story must be about guys.. hohohooo..
I wish I will nvr ever talk about that particular person with anyone.. not even say his name.. I was hurt.. I dunno what I've done wrong to be treated this way.. If I ever done him bad.. shouldn't appropriate that I be informed?? but nay.. nya treated me very bad, but still I wish he has all the possible reliable reasons for it.

Zi,
Sorry.. each time we were talking about them .. its hurt me.. sorta a knife stab my heart over n over.. I feel pain even till now.. They don't deserve the respect.. Let them be what they want.. I was being real about karma thingy.. but I do wish they hv a good life.. after all they really enjoying their life..

I was being honest.. to think some1 who hurts my feeling deserve respect n can be treated as fren was the biggest mistake ever. But it doesn't matter coz I know one fine day, I'll take all this as a great experience in my life journey.

To start a new relationship with some1 who reflects the ex, is very wrong. I did it once n thats it.. If I ever wanna start a new r/ship, it just bcoz i like that person as he is not bcos he remind me of sum1.

N for a fren who used to be my bestfren which then just tossed me aside when he got a new gf, I'm sorry that we can't be like we used to be coz i know who I'am to u now.. I'm just a goodfren when u r in interval period.. when u dun hv gf, when u just broke up with ur gf.. that was when I'm needed as ur fren.. It's just over.. I'm just ur fren.. :) just a fren who no longer can discuss her problem with u.. a fren who u needs to hang out with or hv fun wth.. I'm just get enof of all this..

Enough said.. I wish I don't hv to know anything about any of them... They can just get the hell out of my life.. :(

Hv a nice day every1..

Thursday, September 13, 2007

Sayang...

I've been knowing few guys in my life. In fact I've had special relationship with few guys. I'm not saying I know guy's habit very much but more or less I started to be open minded n try to accept as what it is.

When I wasn't really exposed to the real life.. to the types of guy we hv out there.. i swore to myself that I would never ever accept a betrayal especially when it happened to me. Being betrayed by my love one. But now, the swore it just not applicable nowadays.. Most of guys are betrayal.. so what to do?? One day, u will still gonna marry a betrayal.. huhuuhuu

I was so miserable back then n I started to do stupid things. Then I learn few things about guys. Not all guys are the same but all are so n so..

I used to be negative thinker.. when my bf called me 'sayang', I accused him calling me sayang coz he mite worry saying the wrong name as he may has so many girls in his life. But that doesn't bother me. As long as he happy go ahead..

But now, my kinda thought is no longer the same. I had few ppl called me sayang at times. Which some of them dun really mean it. Just for the sake of trying to cheer me up. Like hell.. do I look like I need u to call me sayang just to make me happy??

I wonder, why izzit so simple for u guys out there to claim u love the gurls tho deep inside u dun hv the feeling. How easy for u to make gurl trust u n at the same time, u have some1 else and at the end pretending it is all the gurl's fault. I just don't understand.. how could u love 2 person at one time? I really dun understand. I came across this type of guy throughout my love life. So should I say, my love life is sucks?

Na.. my lovelife was great. yea it WAS great. When I love some1 I really do. Perhaps sometimes, I don't know to show the love. But I do love... Perhaps sometimes, I show so much love.. but ppl take it as hatred.

Now, I dun understand how could these ppls call me 'sayang' when they actually already hv a girlfren? What would the gurl feels if she knows about it? It just came to me.. I've met the family. I'm welcomed to the family. I was trying so hard to be welcomed.. but when I thought the family love me, the guys just throw the shit out of my face. Well, it happened twice. So I dun bother to gv a damn about it anymore.

It doesnt matter if he is my x or he is my bf or he is my enemy.. as long as he loves me n really wants me.. he should know what to do. Dun give lame excuses coz I dun need those.

To all my Xs, I've never wanted to see you guys miserable. In fact to know ur life is miserable break my heart into pieces. I've never wish bad things. So if ever happened please never put the blame on me. I've made mistakes in the relationship n I'm really sorry... so really2 sorry. Hurt to know from ppl that I was blamed for whatever it is..

To my bfs, take care of ur gurls carefully. Nvr hurt them by having affairs with other gurls.

To my gfs, I would never suggest u to trust guys 100%. But love can turn ur life upside down.

I tot X's can be fren.. but the fact, not all X can be fren.. So take care n hv a nice day...

Sittin up here all alone,
Need some time so i'm on my own,
remanissin coz i'm missin u
don't understand it,
situation is not my miss,
wozn't supposed to be like this,
dermat time hurry up be quick ummm,
tell me

y did last night, have to happen
y did u have to creep with her,
now it's too late, to say i'm sorry
and i can't avoid the hurt,
my heart is breakin,

(CHORUS)

X-Boyfriend,
that's wot u r 2 me and
u think you're so safe
but you're gonna miss this
but you're gonna miss this
coz u know i found out you're creepin
X-Boyfriend,
don't wanna have 2 c u again,
u think you're so safe
but you're gonna miss this
coz u know i found out you're creepin

Sweet talker
so kool i thought u meant those things u sed,
all those promises u made to me you're messin wid my head,
still i'll, get by, can't be a fool never be a fool never no more...
(RAP)
I told u b4 i don't try 2 play the rock,
but creepin on me is where the rough stops,
i used 2 give u praise man luv n all that now i'm takin it back coz u aint all that
now it's about time for a bran new choice,
so i'm movin on up from x-boy 2 next-boy
n this time wen u see me luk good
know wot ur missin understood!

# I just couldn't sleep to think about this.. Do I look that bad??

Thursday, June 14, 2007

Rain Rain Go Away

Smlm blk rumah ngan mata bengkak. Even pg ni sblh mata still lg bengkak. Touch up skit ngan eyeliner n eyeshadow.. tak nampak sangat.

So this morning kinda not really in d mood.. so start up life with not-so-good-mood. Had to finish off da survey oceanography thingy. Hohoho.. just couldn't believe I jump from Food Tech to Marine Science.. wakakakaa.. hell great Suci!! (just to make myself happy) :)

I was kene marah this evening by a great great great fren of mine. The best fren ever.. well, its quite sometimes tak ingat pasal hiM.. smlm tiba2 je pun.. teringat kat him..tu pun sebab gatal baca email lelama tu..hehe.. its hard to forget 4 yrs relationship. Lagi2 first love. It's damn hell hurt u know..

Sedangkan lelaki pun blh jd biol putus cinta.. lg la pulak pompuan.. ada gak yg bercinta setahun lebih bila putus jd tak betul.. bukanla giler just that he didn't walk on the rite path la.. senang citer.. lenglong je hidup..

Not saying I'm still in the rite path.. aku pun da jauh terpesong.. but still I can stand n walk still in the rite manner. Hohohoo... Tp da almost 2 years da ni.. any1 nk teman aku celebrate 2 yrs break off celebration.. hehe.. this year lg meriah.. 50yrs Malaysia merdeka.. yup exactly on the August 31.

Tonite mood kinda ok.. Thanks again to the best fren ever... Love u so so muchh..

So my great great great fren.. thanks 4 d advice.. U'll always my best fren ever.. Love u so much!!!

Sunday, June 03, 2007

Life is still a life..

Life, no matter how hard.. live on..
Learnt something today, when u were not in ur habitat, get to know the rules n regulation of the new habitat.
That is rule of life..
It is so simple but yet, ppl always forget.
I did that mistake which I unintentionally forgot..
I'm sorry..
I forgot that I'm no longer belong to d community..
I forgot the rule of life..


Do u know how great it feels to talk with the person u used to love? I kinda miss to talk with him rite now.. hehee..

"The height of pain in life is to sit near the person u love d most .....
but you never told here how much you love her !!!!! "


#CInta tak harus memiliki..

Bagi sesetengah orang, terminologi “Cinta itu tak harus memiliki” adalah kata-kata bagi orang yang telah kalah dan bagi kaum yang cintanya ditolak. Yeah, suka atau tidak, itu memang milik orang yang telah mengalami kasih tak sampai. Tapi, kali ini, marilah kita merenungkan terminologi itu dengan agak sedikit dewasa (halah.. sok bijak.. sok dewasa).

Apakah benar, rasa sayang dan cinta itu harus memiliki? Apakah untuk menyayangi orang yang kita cintai, maka kita harus menjadi kekasihnya? Jika perasaan ketika menjadi kekasih, sewaktu masih dalam waktu perkenalan dengan perasaan ketika kita disakiti kerana cinta ditolak berbeza, itu adalah kasih sayang TIPU. Rasa sayang itu hanyalah diadakan agar kita mendapatkan balasan sayang juga. Dan secara hukum, itu bisa dikategorikan sebagai penipuan terencana (halah, sok serius pulah).

Cinta dan sayang yang ideal tentunya adalah ikhlas. Cinta adalah memberi dan berkorban tanpa mengharapkan balas apapun dari sang kekasih. Pengorbanan, tentu saja bukan hanya pengorbanan waktu, tenaga, dan material, namun seringkali yang terasa sangat sakit adalah korban perasaan. Bayangkan, mampukah engkau tersenyum bahagia di saat sang kekasih memperkenalkan kekasihnya kepadamu, menjabat tangannya dengan hangat dan berkata, “Assalamu’alaikum warahmatullah…“, semoga rahmat Allah tetap ada padamu! Mampukah engkau merasa bahagia melihatnya berbahagia bersama orang pilihannya?

Ah, tentu saja hal itu amat sulit dilakukan. Kita hanyalah manusia biasa yang punya cita2 dan motivasi. Apapun yang kita lakukan, tentu ada upah meskipun sekecil pasir. Jika tak ada upah, lalu apa motivasi kita melakukan itu? Hanya karena sayang? Yakin? Apakah benar kita tidak mengharapkan untuk kembali kepada kita suatu hari nanti? Apakah benar kita tidak mengharapkan untuk mendapatkan senyum manisnya? Karena senyum manis itulah yang rasanya bisa mengobati luka-luka meskipun sebentar….

Namun demikian, aku tetap yakin bahwa cinta yang ikhlas itu tetap ada. Parameternya, jika kamu tetap menyayanginya, tetap baik padanya, tetap membantunya ketika ia memerlukan pertolongan, itu artinya kamu bisa dikatakan telah ikhlas. Lepas dari berapa besar korban perasaan yang kamu derita. Terlepas berapa lebar luka yang terkoyak di hatimu. Namun jika engkau telah tersenyum tatkala melihat orang yang kau cintai itu berbahagia, aku yakin, itulah cinta tanpa balasan itu.

Nah, setelah ini, akan muncul pertanyaan, apakah dengan kita tetap menyayanginya, itu berarti dia tetap ada di hati? Dan itu artinya tidak adil untuk seorang yang baru masuk ke dalam kehidupan? Karena cinta kepadanya akan terbagi dengan cinta masa lalu?

Monday, May 21, 2007

Cium..


Ciuman di Dahi

Selalu juga kita saksikan seorang lelak mencium pasangan wanitanya di dahi. Apakah tandanya? Jika anda pernah dihadiahkan sebuah kucupan di dahi itu tandanya si dia begitu kasih terhadap anda. Dan kasihnya begitu kudus. Anda dapat berasakan getaran kasihnya pada anda begitu syahdu.


Ciuman Sayang
Jika pasangan anda mengucup anda di pipi, itu tandanya si dia sayang pada anda. Malah jika anda sedang marah dan dia tiba2 mencium pipi anda, itu maknanya dia tetap sayang pada anda walaupun apa yang terjadi. Malah ciuman sayang di pipi sering dihadiahkan oleh sang suami kepada isteri dalam suasana gurau senda dan ceria. Begitu juga apabila suami baru pulang dari kerja atau berjalan jauh, satu ciuman di pipi menandakan dia sayangkan anda, rindukan anda dan cintanya pada anda terus bersemi.

# Tetiba je entry ni eh.. sebab aku baru hbs tgk citer 'Satu Kecupan'. Jadi ingat blk all the memory.. saat2 romantis gitu... :p


Monday, May 14, 2007

Live your life to the fullest..

I miss my ma.. Love ya Ma..

1. Happy Mother's Day

Selamat Hari Ibu to all mom out there.. termasuk yg bakal2 menjadi ibu.. It was yesterday tapi since aku baru dapat nk update today.. tu pun kira okla yer..
Called Mom early in the morning.. tried both home n hp but nobody pick up the phone. The second trial was around 10 0'clock in the morning when again left me dissapointed. Around 11.. then I remembered Mom n Dad went for Kursus haji.. they got the call for their second Hajj this year.. So I called mom again @ 1pm. Wish Mom Happy Mother's Day.. U'r the greatest Mom in the world Mama..
It's pissed me off to know Im the last child to wish Mom.. yet I'm her first child.. but nvm.. i said I called since early morning.. I LOVE YOU MOM!!

Hard to do..

2. It's hard to turn ppl down

I used to like some1 and that sum1 turned me down.. it seems so easy for him to do so. So I think, it should be easy for me to reject some1. :D
But to be honest with.. I think to handle rejection is the hardest part. N to reject is another story.. I tot, it would be easy for me to handle rejection n to reject but now I realized.. its not that easy.. its so fuckin difficult.. its hard to live knowing that u hurt ppl..its hard to understand u broke som1's heart.. its hurt me so damn much!!
I'm sorry that I hurt you.. If only I can turn back time.. If only that never happen.. If only and only if.. I wish this is all dream.. I wanna wake up tomorrow n this is all a nightmare..

I wanna be by ur side as ur best buddy ever..

I miss my spongy so much.. huwaaaa

3. Complicated

I wanna go home!! Huwaaaa... Bosan kat sini taktau nk wat per.. plus rasa cam nk blk umah.. Rindu ngan spongy yg tertinggal kat DJC. Minta2la takde bau2 yg tak diingini nanti kat spongy aku.. Last nite teringin kueteow mali..
Things happened yesterday yg buat aku agak down giler.. damn!!

LIVE YOUR LIFE TO THE FULLEST SUCI!!

Njoying life k!!
4. List to do..

Hopefully aku dapat setelkan segala perkara yg aku nk buat b4 I turn 30.. hehee
-Scuba diving license
-Naik g puncak Mount Kinabalu sampai dapat sijil berwarna (bak kata Ros)
-G backpackers yg betul2 nyer.. yg giler budget.. :D
-water rafting
-sailing
- n the list go on..

Friday, May 11, 2007

Enjoy your life to the fullest...

Got nothing to do today. Just sitting like a stupid dumb at henry's place. Then watching frens playing SAIDINA.. then again sitting here doing nothing. Trying to make myself not so boring.. just read some blog sites which hv been neglected for like an ages.. hehe.. ada updates.. ingatkan mmg nk biarkan bersawang.. :p

Hmm.. so many things happened lately.. dari sekecil2 masalah sampaila ke sebesar2 masalah. Well, hidup kalo takde masalah tak rasala manis masin kehidupan kan?? Even me pun facing so many problems tapi its all depends on how we handling it.. Macam me.. ermm i always treat or face problems with tears.. haha.. skit2 nangis.. skit2 nangis.. as I think.. cry can at least lessen the burden.. hehe.. Ada gak org yg handle the probs with emotion yg totally different.. from orang yg tak reti marah to some1 yg kepala hangin or panas baran... dan mungkn juga dari org yg happy go lucky to som1 yg pendiam giler..

Aku in contact wif current gf of Mr Syamirza n also the ex gf. Some said, asal nk cari masalah lagi.. takyah amik tau hal derang da.. jgn buat serabut kepala.. aku takde niat paper pun baik nga derang.. it just that, derang tgur aku n aku layan je.. bagi aku takde maknanya nk bergaduh2.. lagipun benda2 yg da lepas watpe nk serabutkan kepala lg. Right?? Well, kadang2 org boleh bg bad impression kat kita sebab dengar cerita dari orang lain.. thats whut I learnt in life.. Now, though some of the habit or Ms Dayang tu aku tak suka sangat.. but she's a good buddy.. psycho.. ermm that one aku takleh nk komen.. She's getting married n I'm invited to the reception kat Promenade this coming August.. nk gi.. tapi airasia nyer tix.. mak aihhh.. rabak poket makkk nyahh oiii..

Asal get involve with Mr Syamirza nyer life lg?? Damn!! Aku da tak involve pe pun.. cuma awek dia tu jer yg sibuk2 nak chat ngan aku.. nk delete id aku dari ym Mr Syamirza.. Nak delete.. delete jerla.. In fact da lama aku suh mmt tu delete id aku dari list dia.. tapi dia yg degil.. skrg ni kan da susah asik gaduh ngan gf jer.. padahal bukan aku ada kacau dia pun.. Aihh takde kejenye la aku nk kacau dia.. Aku tertengok status awek mamat tu tadi. - "Syarien"- Aku rasa cam nk tergelak guling2 pun ada.. hehe.. dulu ngan 1st awek dia - "Syadilla"- pastu ngan aku.. "Syamelia".. ermm pastu ngan dayang.. aper ehh aku lupa.. tapi all i can say... sumer yg ada gabung2 nama tu.. tak lama mana la.. :p
Apsal hati ni degil sangat.. susah nk pujuk hati ni supaya akur je.. tp mmg da jenis degil nk mampos. Bak kata Yazi.. sayang orang yg sayang kat kita.. jgn harap org yg dah takde.. jgn harap org yg takde perasaan kat kita.. Ingatkan snang.. susah rupa2nya.. So all i can do is.. enjoy my life to the fullest.. selagi ada kesempatan.. selagi masih bernyawa.. nikmati alam ciptaan Allah ni dengan sebaiknya..

Things always happened with a reason... aku hanya perlu belajar mensyukuri tiap sesuatu perkara yg telah terjadi..

Im sorry coz I love you.. Im sorry coz Im thinkin of you.. Im sorry coz I can't hv you..

Thursday, April 26, 2007

What?

Part 1

What would you feel when suddenly u feel like some ppl wanted to know about ur life.. whats goin on with your life.. wutcha doin.. who's ur current partner.. it's fine if you're celebrities but as layman like me??

Im getting sick with all such questions guys.. especially question smells similar with these one..
"Who r u seeing currently?" or " Are u dating anyone?" or "Is it true u n him urmm.. u know.."

Hello.. wake up!! Its my life.. its my fuckin life so up to me what am I doing or what am I heading to..perghh ni betul2 liya..aka..liar ni.. :p

Part 2

N How would u feel when suddenly one certain sum1 know about u.. more than u know about urself.. ermm.. kinda pelik gak when this certain ppl bleh plak telling ppl about me which I've no idea mana dia dapat berita2 pelik tu..

Nah.. I just come back from visiting a fren.. then otw tu.. a fren of mine called n ktorg bergayut spjg2 jalan tu.. No.. its not about him.. its about what he told me.. Takpe.. later kita citer..

Part 3

Izzit fair to say I love you when u dun feel it at all?? Let say just to jaga hati or just wanna say it.
Heart is a complex organ.. yet its the most complicated one.. Till now, I still dun understand my heart..

Heart is not to be understood.. Only do what your heart tells you (Princess Diana)..

**************************************************

OK.. lets start one by one..
Tapi mata da ngantuk.. otak pun da penat..
tangan da malas..

OKla.. just secebis peringatan..bukan amaran.. not trying to be man coz I know I'm a gurl ehh silap I'm a cute gurl.. :p

Perlu ke aku nk buat annoucement about myself?? Mind your own business la k.

Sriyes tak sangka arr jadi sampai macam ni skali. Aku ingat tak kacau orang, takdela org nk kacau aku. Tapi lain plak jadinya.

Disclaimer:: Im still single and available k.. Kenyataan aku da bertunang or kawin or kejadah haram semua itu adalah fitnah semata2..

Pastu ngan sapa aku nk berkawan, bertunang atau kawin da ditetapkan kat luh mahfuz.. aku hanya akan menjalani je nanti.. so tunggu n lihat jerla.. bleh??

I know Im getting older.. in fact aku da suku abad da pun.. tapi jodoh pertemuan ajal maut semua tu ditangan Allah.. He knows best.. OK!!



Tuesday, April 24, 2007

rentetan...

Morning.

Bibik: Neng, mo makan apa ye?
Aku : Bik, buatkan bubur kosong. Lapar.
Bibik: Ya neng.

Aku sambung tdo blk sampai bibik kejutkan bangun tuk makan.
Makan 2-3 suap.. pastu muntah kat lantai blk tdo tu.. bau muntah buat aku nk muntah lg n lg..

"Bik!.. Bik!.. Bibik!!!"
"Ya neng. Aduh neng udah muntah lg ni neng. Bentar bibik bersihin."

Bibik da bersihkan blk aku, sembur air freshener. Aku makin loya.. Bila nk sihat ni.. huhuu..

Tak lama lepas tu, mama blk.
"Ci dah makan?" Aku angguk.
"Ubat dah makan?" angguk lagi.
"Ada muntah? Ada ciritbirit lg?" angguk gak.. Ma, sakit perut.. pening kepala.. huhuuu..

Tgh hari, bibik hantar nasi bubur lg. Kali ni ada sayur ada ayam. Blom makan da rasa nk muntah. Takmo bik.. thanks.. Petang skit, rasa cam da ada tenaga. bangun tdo..cuci muka then tersadai tak toilet.. habis tenaga tu blk.. uwaaa..

Kul 5.30pm, bibik gerak tanya if aku bleh amik jamil kat skul. Tgk luar hari hujan. Takde sapa kat umah.. aku pun kata ok kot.. terus amik kunci kete n terus g skul jamil. Jamil nek kete dia tegur "Akak tak pakai tudung?" aku pun cam ha?? mamai sungguh.. singgah kedai beli lg 2 botol 100+, then beli asam utk hlgkan loya (bijak tak?? ahahaa) then blk..

Sampai rumah, bibik tanya lg nk makan ape.. aku ckp teringin nk makan laksa.. haih ntah apa saja yg aku teringin nk makan ni.. mlm aku try gak telan nasi n ayam BERSAMBAL (yummy). As the result, aku almost tertdo kat dalam toilet. huhuuu.. degil sangat!!

Pagi2 mama kejut tanya nk makan apa bekfes.. aku ckp tak nk makan.. nanti muntah blk. Mama call papa. Cakap ngan papa..
"Makan apa ni sampai teruk camni? Dah brapa hari ni?"
"Tatau makan aper.. ish ish ish.." last2 aku tak bercakap.. sibuk nangis.. pastu for the past 10minutes, cuma dgr papa pujuk anak yayang dia ni berenti nangis.. ngeh ngeh ngeh.. nk wat camne??
Flite papa delay esok. So hari ni papa takde kat sinila. Esok prob baru papa sampai.

Pagi ni mama masakkan bubur nasi n sup tulang. Makan byk gakla.. pastu masuk blk aku rasa loya2 cam nk muntah blk. last2 aku makan asam boi.. ehehe.. bijak2...

Sekarang aku nk tdo.. baru lepas makan ubat mata pun rasa cam takmo terbukak je.. so izinkan beta beradu barang seketika..

OPTIMIS-AB THREE

Tak Perlu malu dan kecil hati apalagi frustasi
Terlampau keji, bila terlintas hendak membunuh diri

Kegagalan itu hal biasa dalam hidup ini
Setiap orang pasti punya satu masalah dan masa lalu---> setujuuuuh dan setubuuh banget daaah :p

Anggap derita sbagai cobaan dan satu pengalaman
Yang mesti dapat kita hadapi dengan hati yang lapang

Kegagalan itu hal biasa dalam hidup ini
Setiap orang pasti punya satu masalah dan masa lalu

Temaaan, hidup ini hanya satu kali (bersyukurlah temaaaaan)
Temaaan, untuk apa kita menyiksa diri
Hadapilah semua kenyataan yang ada
Serta raihlah cita2 hidup bahagiaaaa :)

Saturday, April 07, 2007

A moment to remember..

I've watched this movie. I missed when it was aired on TV but a fren of mine has the movie so finally i manage to watch it. Try to dl but always failed..huhhuu..

Nice sad movie. A friend said, 'A walk to remember' much better. A bit sad, but 'A moment to remember' it's unexplainable why some gurls cry watching this movie..huhuuu

We watched the movie together which end up, my fren fall into deep sleep while I was watching the movie sobbing all the way. Sampai bengkak2 mata..huhuu.. It's not that the movie is so sad.. it just hmm.. how should i put it.. senang citer camni la.. do u think pure love is still exist in this world?? of course ada gak kot.. but less than a little.. :p

I cried bcoz of the husband's love, its so pure, eternal. Doesn't matter if the wife dun remember him.. he loves n cares about her..

Ladies, get this straight: guys like Choi Chol-Soo (the husband) DO NOT exist in real life. You'd have a better chance of finding Bigfoot than a sensitive, loving, and yet utterly righteous dude like Choi Chol-Soo. Hmm.. guess I'll never come across any.. But I've met my dear just to know he left me forever.. :D

********************************************

Another 20 days.. counting days to celebrate his supposed to be 27th Birthday.. I'm still counting babe.. I'll get u the 'kain batik' u asked me for from Bandung.. We r supposed to celebrate ur b'day babe.. Damn!!!! I miss you so much.. Oh ya, ur mom called me to tell that they r moving this morning.. I wish I can see her but u know I'm not that strong. I'll see Lata b4 fly off to Bandung.. All of us miss you babe.. Wish we can hang out like we used to. Lata always hide her tears when talk about u babe.. I know how close u guys..

My life getting complicated babe.. I dunno what to do.. I need you by my side to help me out. But though u r no longer around, at the presence of pian n haikal n lata.. I feel ur presence.. Stucked btw dreams n hopes..

It doesn't matter babe..
Oh why is it so sad? The feeling that I have now is even sadder than the feeling that I had when I broken-hearted. It doesn’t feel good at all, babe…

Wish you ok over there babe.. I'm always sent you my prayers.. U take care babe.. Dun worry about me..I'm ok n I feel better.. I got my old fren back.. I'm happy 4 it. Don't u happy 4 me 2? Smile for me, will ya?

Miss you so much babe..

******************************************

Nak jumpa muzamm.. lama tak jumpa dia.. rindu la.. hahaa... esok kene amik sakit baki mini thesis tu... adehh..

Saturday, March 31, 2007

Fight..

Well, masalah yg aku senri cari so aku kene setelkan professionally.. huhuu
Sapa suh kan cari hal ngan bf orng.. huhuu.. bukan salah aku pun.. kalo bertepuk sblh tangan takkan berbunyi tul tak?? Adehh... aku pun bukan betul2 seyes pun.. saja suka2.. huhuuu..

Erm.. takde paper tp gaduh cam couple.. hahaa.. tak tepon mrajuk ehh... ahakss.. lawakla.. kekadang rasa cam life ni cam aper je.. Anyway, aku pun takmo kaco rumahtangga org lelama.. kang buatnya aku sangkut betul2 naya je.. ermm cam dah nk sampai je tahap tu.. huwaaaa...

Pagi td, konon2 nk mrajuk arr sebab smlm tak call.. wakakaaa.. tapi tak dan nk mrajuk tgh2 kene pujuk tu, kantoi ngan awek dia...bengong tul.. dah tau awek ada dekat p tepon aku watpe ntah.. sengal!!

Hahaa.. aku kene sound ngan awek dia.. Rasa cam seronok je kene sound.. giler takde perasaan aku nih...(erkk aku tak dgr pun apa minah tu ckp sebab aku campak tepon kat atas katil n aku p cuci kain..) hahaaa..

Pehtu, aku layan men sms blk, n aku dok dl2 lagu.. sekalinya jumpa lg ni.. n aku tujukan lagu ni khas 4 him.. :D Lets call it a day dear.. (jgn lukakan hati lain kerna satu hati hati ini mgkn akan dilukai)

# Kekusutan jiwa buat aku sakit jiwa... ermm bare with my entry.. i mite not in rational mode :D

Cinta maafkan diriku
Yang telah membuat hatimu terluka
Karena keadaan ini
Cintaku harus memilih
Mengertilah...
Dengarkanlah hati

Kadang awan menghitam
Kadang langit tak berbintang
Kadang sesuatu yang tak ingin terjadi
Tapi terjadi...

Kadang kita tak sadari
Kenyataan mengingkari
Mengertilah cintamu dan cintaku
Harus berakhir...

Mungkin ini yang terbaik
Tuk kita berdua mengakhiri semua
Karena cinta yang terjalin
Lukai cinta yang lain

Mengertilah...
Kau bukan milikku

Meski berat ku melepaskanmu
Karena hatiku juga untukmu
Ku harus merelakanmu

Kadang sesuatu yang tak ingin terjadi...
Tapi terjadi...
Kadang kita tak sadari...
Kenyataan mengingkari...

Mengertilah cintamu dan cintaku
Harus berakhir...

Wednesday, March 21, 2007

mEmOrY VClip

Jumpa blk gambar2 time tgh bertungkus lumus siapkan thesis.. Arghh sweet memories time blaja.. :D

I was cleaning some unnecessary stuffs from my lpc. I came across few files which meant a lot to me back then but no longer important nowadays. Its sorta vclips taken during ‘masa kesengalan’ not so long time ago.. hehe.. so watch it for the last time n deleted everything.. the things bcome unnecessary when it meant nothing to me.. uhuhu..

There are lots of file.. the total vclip took about almost 2G.. gilak arrhh.. including vclip taken using cameraphone. Erm.. memory semalam..it shouldn’t be here in this lpc anymore.. hehee.. I dun hv CD burner so I dun see the ‘kepentingan’ 4 burning such unnecessary files.. :p

As I told Mike, buatnya aku masuk AF, ada org nk sabotaj.. tak pasal2 je all the vclip exposed to the net.. hahaa.. glamer mak kejap nyah.. :p

Well, tipula if waktu tgk all the vid I dun feel anything.. of coursela ada rasa ermm.. rougeberry skit.. :p na la.. just miss those moments.. phuuhh.. I still hv heart.. I still can missing ppl, I still feel hurt.. I’m just being ignorance.. that’s all..

Maafkan aku duhai kasih… Izinkan ku pergi…

Well, citer lama shouldn’t be brought up lg.. Aku relakan segalanya.... :)
Have a nice long life..
Take care..

Monday, March 12, 2007

Kini Ku Bahagia..

Aritu tgh2 dl2 lagu dari multiply.. came across one song from Audy.. Aku pun dl la.. mana tau best ke... then..lepas dengar lagu2 tu.. aku suka.. hahaha... it's my fav song rite now..

Saat ku berpisah dengannya
Duniaku kini berwarna
Takkan pernah ada lagi cerita bersamanya

Mungkin dulu ku tak mengerti
Mungkin juga terlalu dini
Dia yang pernah berjanji
Tlah berdusta

Dan aku tak kuasa.. jiwaku pun tersiksa
Haruskah ku korbankan cinta
Tapi ku terlena..nikmati indah cinta
Kukira tuk slamanya

Dan kini.. aku pun tlah bebas
Sepi ku pun tlah sirna
Tanpa harus slalu pikirkannya
Dan aku.. kini telah bahagia lakukan yang kusuka
Tanpa harus cemaskannya

Semua telah berubah
Hidupku kan ceria
Tanpa ada lagi airmata
Diri ini tlah bisa
Melupakan semua.. sampai nanti kutemukan cinta

# "I hope, akula orang yg ko maksudkan tu.." - sudah2 la tu.. aku da tak larat nk layan perangai2 yg buat aku rasa loya n nk muntah.. should I say.. sume pun sama je.. sucks as a hell..
* Too tired with student's reports.. aku rasa cam nk muntah da tgk report yg ntah2 paper ntah tu.. Aku tatau derang paham ke tak ape yg aku dok membebel kat depan tu.. Arghhh!!

Friday, March 09, 2007

Invisible war...


Tepat 30 days..
FInally...
I tot there'll be no words till the end..
Thanks anyway..

Hectic day..
Got lotz of things to do..

Benda lama takyah bring up blk..
I'm ok..
I'm over it already pun..
Tak perlu bangkitkan blk..
It's ok with me..

I'm kewl what :p




Invisible war, seems we're waging an invisible war
Strained manoeuvres, keeping silent score
In this invisible war
Every day I seem to lose you more
Both wishing that it was like before
In this invisible war

Talk about a fine line between love and hate
We've lost more than our direction of late
Talk about a fine line between lovers and friends
We've never been lovers, now we're not even friends

In this invisible war, seems we're waging an invisible war
Every day I seem to lose you more
In this invisible war

Wounded deeply, the scar is here to stay
Opening up at little things I do and say
You always want things to be as before
So I make you angry and you bleed a little more

In this invisible war, seems we're waging an invisible war
Every day I seem to lose you more
In this invisible war

Wanna run away
I still love you
Gotta go away
I always love you
Gotta be away
Time heals all wounds

#Better fren than enemy... Lovers are meant to be enemy.. :p Izzit??