Life is so unexpected 3

I called my coz since we haven't meet since Raya.. since raya?? duhh lama giler tak jumpa! I was at her home that time. She said, she's having this futsol tournament with Puteri UMNO and won't be back till evening. So I guess I have to face the boredom till these 3 moms finish their discussion. Then my aunt said about her elder daughter. 'She seems to be broken hearted and since then get herself busy.' We were being informed that the guy's family will come over for engagement. So we got ready couple of week earlier. You've no idea how excited working on this wedding stuffs.. lol

Last minute, the guy call and tell us that the grandpa is admitted to ICU. So the family asked to be postponed on the coming weekend. So again, we just pack up everything and cooked whatever raw material n hv party ourselves.. The coming week, again they cannot come. The guy called and gv another reason.. again ask if they can postponed again. So after 3 times, the guy's mother called and keep apologizing. OKla, so we start the whole new thing again. But this time around, my aunt ask them to make sure they can make it. It embarrassing to cancel and call again the family so many times. It's not like everybody free every weekend.. At the end, they guy n family just didn't come. How hard for me to accept this, it is even harder for coz to face it. I didn't really ask her on what happened after that, but I learn from my aunt that, she call the guy n said, 'That's it!'. So it just over.. just like that..

Hmm.. when I thought, I had very bad experience.. the truth is there is a lot out there who had worst situation. Thank Allah. Perhaps HE knows that I can't handle pressure up to that extend so HE gv me a little test.

Oh ya, it was Sunday rite so AJL was on the way that night. End up with the 24th Juara Lagu won by Aizat with Pergi. Giler menusuk jiwa dan raga lagu ni.. Berdiri bulu romaku.. huhuu..
That nite, had quite a late nite. Almost 1am baru tdo. Baru je nak terlelap phone bunyi. Actually, only one person yg gile call at unreasonable time. So I was so lazy nk buka mata, just ignore je. But the phone keep singing.. Haiyoo..

Dalam keadaan mamai n agak marah, I picked up the phone.
'Ci....', Lin was on the line ngan sore serak2 basah cm baru lepas nangis.
'Lin, whats up? Thought u r F******.'
Well, I've to listen to her cry for about half an hour before she can actually speak. My junior schoolmate. We were close bcoz Mom n her mom is friend. So we still keep in touch time to time. I envy her for REAL. Her fiancee is HOT and handsome. The wedding they planned thoroughly and it almost like dreams come true. It is more like fairy tales. From the bottom of my heart, I envy her very much. I know, I would never be able to hv such a great wedding.

She's been working since after high school. The money she saved were used for wedding preparation. The wedding is in this coming march. After what happened to both of my coz, I can't think anything alike. So I was thinking perhaps something bad happened, accident, death, or something..

'Ci, Wan..' she said between sobs. Me, being Me I can't think of anything but something bad, real bad.
' Kenapa ngan Wan? Ko ok ke?'. Me worried if Wan having accident, parah or worst come to worst mati ke??
'Dia ckp aku da tak attractive. Dia nk cancel the wedding'. WTF???!! OK, I didn't say it out loud but thats too much.. That is too fuckin much!!
OK,

Seriusly I don't know what is going on. Tp the reason given were irrational. Unacceptable. Dengar dia nangis camtu, rasa cam nk start engine kete n reach her in no time. Tp I was at home. Parents will be worried aku kuar pagi2 buta camtu. Lucky me if I even get permission.

Another wedding to be canceled. In one day 2 weddings was canceled. 2 hearts were broken while more hearts bleeding. Lepas sesi luahan perasaan, aku duduk and menung sampai pagi. Berfikir katanya, tp otak blank. Teringat kes Nouq, itu pun rasanya da tak blh nk masuk kat akal fikiran org waras. Tp that happened. This is exactly the same situation. Only that, the guy yg decide to cancel the wedding. At least Nouq is still lucky, she hasn't really into wedding prep.

I was wondering, how on earth guy can decide to marry some1 just becoz the girl turn him on. When the attraction of the lady is no longer there, the lady no longer turn him on, he no longer have this hard-on while being with her/see her, he decided they cannot get married. And he said that, when the attraction is no longer there it's mean that love vanish too. Is that how you measure your love??That is so lame excuse. COrny!

I tot, we get marry bcoz of love. bcoz of we are ready for commitment. What kind of stupid reason of getting married is that? I tot, any guy will get hard-on when being with any girl. (erkk.. salah ke?? ) Say, watching movie.. boy n girl.. holding hands, her head on his shoulder etc etc. This should turn any guys on. Or am I wrong? Gotta ask few guys on this matter. Later..

Back then, I always questioned why my ex chose to tell me the truth. Why he had to tell me that he had affair n in fact slept with those girls, ladies, and aunties. Why hadn't he keep that to himself so that I don't feel so much pain. Now, I realize the great side of his action. If say, he didn't tell me the truth.. I should hv still waiting for him n blaming myself for not being very good to him. Actually, I did blame myself for quite sometimes. Until some1 hit my head and make me realize how stupid I was. BUt again, I'm still stupid. Lol..

It's a good thing Wan confront Lin before marriage. Kalo lepas da jadi suami, then si suami ngaku yg dia ada nafsu kat lelaki gak? Ok fine, that can be another story. After 2 years engagement, Wan ngaku yg sblm ni dia gay. Ok. Then he met Lin and dia pk hidup dia mcm berubah. He attracted to Lin. He thinks he can change. So come the engagement, wedding n all. After 2 years, he fought all the lust over guys. But then he realized it so hard nk berubah. So he decide to being honest with Lin. Turn out, he is interested to both male n female. FUCK!!!! giler gampang..
gile tamak..

Di sekeliling aku ok. Disekeliling aku je. Just in my circle.
Kata kawan aku.. Sejahat2 N&N, ada lagi org yg lebih jahat Ci. Yeah rite.

Futnot: Kenapa aku mesti kenal orang2 camni ehh?? Nantila sambung lg.. pening palaku!